{"id":2893,"date":"2016-09-16T00:02:00","date_gmt":"2016-09-16T04:02:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/exceltheatre.com\/blog\/?p=2893"},"modified":"2016-09-15T15:31:40","modified_gmt":"2016-09-15T19:31:40","slug":"excel-twitter-20160916","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/exceltheatre.com\/blog\/archives\/2016\/09\/16\/excel-twitter-20160916\/","title":{"rendered":"Excel Twitter 20160916"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>With all the seductive whispering, X-rated workbooks, disturbing dreams and nerdgasms, this week\u2019s collection of tweets might not be suitable for children. If you\u2019re underage, or a sensitive type, perhaps you should play Pokeman Go instead.<\/p>\n<p><!--more--><\/p>\n<h3>This Week\u2019s Tweets \u2013 Plain Text<\/h3>\n<p>Here are the tweets in plain text. The embedded tweets are below.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>I want you to whisper &#8216;pivot table&#8217; in my ear.<\/li>\n<li>excel as a hammer&#8230; hitting nails one worksheet at a time<\/li>\n<li>I just made my first pivot table. I will never make another, if I can avoid it. I will commit serious crimes to avoid having to do so.<\/li>\n<li>The proportion of times when Excel has tried to help me that were actually helpful asymptotes to 0 as t -&gt; infinity<\/li>\n<li>I just made an excel chart of my classes EVERYONE SHOULD DO THIS<\/li>\n<li>Few things more painful in life than working through an excel worksheet as a class<\/li>\n<li>Is there anything more annoying than that stupid yellow enable edit thing when you go to open up Word or Excel documents?!?!<\/li>\n<li>You must be 18 to use this workbook. It&#8217;s rated X for #Excel. O_o<\/li>\n<li>I saved the workbook I&#8217;ve been working on for nearly three hours and excel crashed seconds later. Living life on the absolute edge today<\/li>\n<li>Am I the only one that would LOVE a Pokemon Go to Excel export? I want to track and chart my candy types!<\/li>\n<li>Every pivot table I set up requires three attempts to get it to do what I want. This is supposedly a skill I&#8217;ve had for ~7 years<\/li>\n<li>I&#8217;m the Data King. An Excel formatting wizard. The Pivot Table Prince. All bow before my spreadsheet prowess<\/li>\n<li>This morning I used the neologism &#8220;nerd-gasm&#8221; after solving the problem of there being no n-roots in excel. I&#8217;m both proud and ashamed.<\/li>\n<li>I dreamt about excel functions last night. needless to say, i should work less.<\/li>\n<li>Excel is fine. You&#8217;re the problem.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/exceltheatre.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/09\/twitter20160916b.png\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" style=\"background-image: none; padding-top: 0px; padding-left: 0px; display: inline; padding-right: 0px; border: 0px;\" title=\"Whisper Pivot Table in my ear http:\/\/exceltheatre.com\/blog\/\" src=\"https:\/\/exceltheatre.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/09\/twitter20160916b_thumb.png\" alt=\"Whisper Pivot Table in my ear http:\/\/exceltheatre.com\/blog\/\" width=\"456\" height=\"228\" border=\"0\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<h3>This Week\u2019s Tweets \u2013 Embedded<\/h3>\n<p>Here are the embedded tweets. The tweets in plain text are above.<\/p>\n<p>___<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-lang=\"en\">\n<p dir=\"ltr\" lang=\"en\">I want you to whisper &#8216;pivot table&#8217; in my ear.<\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Tareq + the machine (@TareqAmeer) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/TareqAmeer\/status\/775652591803957248\">September 13, 2016<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<p>___<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-lang=\"en\">\n<p dir=\"ltr\" lang=\"en\">excel as a hammer&#8230; hitting nails one worksheet at a time<\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Nathan Fisher (@natbobc) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/natbobc\/status\/775996747088797696\">September 14, 2016<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<p>___<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-lang=\"en\">\n<p dir=\"ltr\" lang=\"en\">I just made my first pivot table. I will never make another, if I can avoid it. I will commit serious crimes to avoid having to do so.<\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Marcus Kernohan (@mkernohan) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/mkernohan\/status\/776100208614707200\">September 14, 2016<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<p>___<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-lang=\"en\" data-conversation=\"none\">\n<p dir=\"ltr\" lang=\"en\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/stupid_runner\">@stupid_runner<\/a> The proportion of times when Excel has tried to help me that were actually helpful asymptotes to 0 as t -&gt; infinity<\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Colin Angus (@VictimOfMaths) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/VictimOfMaths\/status\/774231653879320576\">September 9, 2016<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<p>___<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-lang=\"en\" data-cards=\"hidden\">\n<p dir=\"ltr\" lang=\"en\">I just made an excel chart of my classes EVERYONE SHOULD DO THIS <a href=\"https:\/\/t.co\/8se1Aoz5Rb\">pic.twitter.com\/8se1Aoz5Rb<\/a><\/p>\n<p>\u2014 \u00af\\_(\u30c4)_\/\u00af (@yodizzler) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/yodizzler\/status\/775941819326607360\">September 14, 2016<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<p>___<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-lang=\"en\">\n<p dir=\"ltr\" lang=\"en\">Few things more painful in life than working through an excel worksheet as a class<\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Ammie \u2728 (@AmmieLevi) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/AmmieLevi\/status\/776413534443962368\">September 15, 2016<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<p>___<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-lang=\"en\">\n<p dir=\"ltr\" lang=\"en\">Is there anything more annoying than that stupid yellow enable edit thing when you go to open up Word or Excel documents?!?!<\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Jennifer Young (@PGJenny) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/PGJenny\/status\/773687413994434561\">September 8, 2016<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<p>___<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-lang=\"en\" data-conversation=\"none\">\n<p dir=\"ltr\" lang=\"en\">You must be 18 to use this workbook. It&#8217;s rated X for <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/Excel?src=hash\">#Excel<\/a>. O_o<\/p>\n<p>\u2014 science_goddess (@science_goddess) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/science_goddess\/status\/773664876304535552\">September 7, 2016<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<p>___<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-lang=\"en\">\n<p dir=\"ltr\" lang=\"en\">I saved the workbook I&#8217;ve been working on for nearly three hours and excel crashed seconds later. Living life on the absolute edge today<\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Casey Gamble (@caseyjgamble) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/caseyjgamble\/status\/775297347534282752\">September 12, 2016<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<p>___<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-lang=\"en\">\n<p dir=\"ltr\" lang=\"en\">Am I the only one that would LOVE a Pokemon Go to Excel export? I want to track and chart my candy types!<\/p>\n<p>\u2014 \/Fay-lee-nuh\/ (@Felienne) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/Felienne\/status\/774547953621032961\">September 10, 2016<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<p>___<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-lang=\"en\">\n<p dir=\"ltr\" lang=\"en\">Every pivot table I set up requires three attempts to get it to do what I want. This is supposedly a skill I&#8217;ve had for ~7 years<\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Sean Connolly (@vaguity) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/vaguity\/status\/775738210316083200\">September 13, 2016<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<p>___<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-lang=\"en\">\n<p dir=\"ltr\" lang=\"en\">I&#8217;m the Data King. An Excel formatting wizard. The Pivot Table Prince. All bow before my spreadsheet prowess<\/p>\n<p>\u2014 M[]KE (@alldayledet) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/alldayledet\/status\/776124605169709056\">September 14, 2016<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<p>___<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-lang=\"en\">\n<p dir=\"ltr\" lang=\"en\">This morning I used the neologism &#8220;nerd-gasm&#8221; after solving the problem of there being no n-roots in excel. I&#8217;m both proud and ashamed.<\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Trivia Tom (@maydont) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/maydont\/status\/776328322292805632\">September 15, 2016<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<p>___<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-lang=\"en\">\n<p dir=\"ltr\" lang=\"en\">I dreamt about excel functions last night. needless to say, i should work less.<\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Jenna Tanenbaum (@urbanfitopia) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/urbanfitopia\/status\/776447406330224640\">September 15, 2016<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<p>___<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-lang=\"en\" data-conversation=\"none\">\n<p dir=\"ltr\" lang=\"en\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/chrisriggins6\">@chrisriggins6<\/a> Excel is fine. You&#8217;re the problem.<\/p>\n<p>\u2014 JA Clark (@JAClark_13) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/JAClark_13\/status\/774360085644447744\">September 9, 2016<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<p>___<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/exceltheatre.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/09\/twitter20160916a.png\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" style=\"background-image: none; padding-top: 0px; padding-left: 0px; display: inline; padding-right: 0px; border: 0px;\" title=\"Whisper Pivot Table in my ear http:\/\/exceltheatre.com\/blog\/\" src=\"https:\/\/exceltheatre.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/09\/twitter20160916a_thumb.png\" alt=\"Whisper Pivot Table in my ear http:\/\/exceltheatre.com\/blog\/\" width=\"456\" height=\"457\" border=\"0\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<h3>Get Weekly Excel News By Email<\/h3>\n<p>To get Excel news and tips by email, add your name for the Contextures Excel newsletter.<\/p>\n<div class=\"AW-Form-1834975337\"><\/div>\n<p><script type=\"text\/javascript\">(function(d, s, id) {\n\tvar js, fjs = d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0];\n\tif (d.getElementById(id)) return;\n\tjs = d.createElement(s); js.id = id;\n\tjs.src = \"\/\/forms.aweber.com\/form\/37\/1834975337.js\";\n\tfjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js, fjs);\n\t}(document, \"script\", \"aweber-wjs-z22n761cb\"));\n<\/script><\/p>\n<p>_____________________<\/p>\n<h3>This Week\u2019s Tweets By<\/h3>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/TareqAmeer\/status\/775652591803957248\">Tareq + the machine<\/a>, <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/natbobc\/status\/775996747088797696\">Nathan Fisher<\/a>, <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/mkernohan\/status\/776100208614707200\">Marcus Kernohan<\/a>, <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/VictimOfMaths\/status\/774231653879320576\">Colin Angus<\/a>, <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/yodizzler\/status\/775941819326607360\">\u00af\\_(\u30c4)_\/\u00af<\/a>, <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/AmmieLevi\/status\/776413534443962368\">Ammie \u2728<\/a>, <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/PGJenny\/status\/773687413994434561\">Jennifer Young<\/a>, <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/science_goddess\/status\/773664876304535552\">science_goddess<\/a>, <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/caseyjgamble\/status\/775297347534282752\">Casey Gamble<\/a>, <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/Felienne\/status\/774547953621032961\">\/Fay-lee-nuh\/<\/a>, <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/vaguity\/status\/775738210316083200\">Sean Connolly<\/a>, <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/alldayledet\/status\/776124605169709056\">M[]KE<\/a>, <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/maydont\/status\/776328322292805632\">Trivia Tom<\/a>, <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/urbanfitopia\/status\/776447406330224640\">Jenna Tanenbaum<\/a>, <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/JAClark_13\/status\/774360085644447744\">JA Clark<\/a><\/p>\n<p>_____________________<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"border-radius: 2px; text-indent: 20px; width: auto; padding: 0px 4px 0px 0px; text-align: center; font: bold 11px\/20px 'Helvetica Neue',Helvetica,sans-serif; color: #ffffff; background: #bd081c  no-repeat scroll 3px 50% \/ 14px 14px; position: absolute; opacity: 1; z-index: 8675309; display: none; cursor: pointer;\">Save<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>With all the seductive whispering, X-rated workbooks, disturbing dreams and nerdgasms, this week\u2019s collection of tweets might not be suitable for children. If you\u2019re underage, or a sensitive type, perhaps you should play Pokeman Go instead.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":2891,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[16],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2893","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-excel-humor"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/exceltheatre.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2893","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/exceltheatre.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/exceltheatre.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/exceltheatre.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/exceltheatre.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2893"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/exceltheatre.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2893\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2897,"href":"https:\/\/exceltheatre.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2893\/revisions\/2897"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/exceltheatre.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2891"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/exceltheatre.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2893"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/exceltheatre.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2893"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/exceltheatre.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2893"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}