Excel Humor

Excel Twitters 20090221

ByDebra Dalgleish

Excel can cure you, or make you sick. It can ruin your social life, or help you find a celebrity match. Candy, fish, beer and movies – Excel can help with almost anything. Just remember, hotties hate Excel, and a geek is cheaper than a book.

Excellent Medicine

  • Suffering from Excel myopia. This is a well known medical condition.
  • is feeling better than this morning. I’m sure an afternoon of excel will change that.
  • A weekend packed with awesome plans became a weekend packed with herbal tea and taxes. Hoping Excel will kill my stomach bug’s will to live.

Purgatory

  • Excel was defiantly designed by the peeps who run Purgatory. One does not know hell till one succumbs to Access 😛
  • I’m with you. There are certainly times when I would rather watch “Baby Einstein” videos than look at Excel spreadsheets.
  • I just got out of an Excel/WinXP support question by telling them “I’m a Mac user”. It was as if I had said “I know less than you.”

Eye Candy

  • I find Gant charts very left brain… and I don’t know what my brain is but neither it nor Excel ‘think’ like me 😉
  • Collecting bags of M&Ms for an Excel workshop for elementary teachers this afternoon. Charting number of each color, graphing, then eating!

Excel is Divine

  • Parents out there I cannot stress this enough, if you teach your kids nothing else teach them Excel! Most important tool in business
  • Best tool besides Undo in Excel? Format Painter…followed by Paste Special and Paste Special/Transpose
  • Being able to do simple things in Excel around the office allows me to stay indispensable, which is nice.
  • I have three bibles…the Holy, Access and Excel. Seriously, the software “Bible” series by Wiley has never failed me. Check them out.

Something Fishy

  • I’m afraid the excel teacher guy is going to spontaneously combust. His pivot table excitement level seems dangerously high.
  • My favorite sushi restaurant has online menus in Excel! I love them even more now that I can make a pivot table of all the rolls.
  • Just used Google docs to make a Fish and Chip order list spreadsheet …. with a PIVOT TABLE!

Social Life

  • hoping that no hotties find out that I’m spending my long weekend learning about Excel macros. hotties HATE excel.
  • I’m updating my Excel to Twitter add-in, but no blog posts planned this weekend
  • someone @microsoft saw my twitter complaint about excel and posted something at getsatisfaction http://tinyurl.com/cm29p6

Tea and Taxes

  • Holy crap, dorkiness achieved. Massive excel spreadsheet of all my movies and tv shows complete with algorithms for rand # generator ranges
  • creating an excel spreadsheet of girlfriends of all my celebrity crushes so I can narrow what they have in common and modify accordingly.
  • Have my virtual assistant from india copying all of my ratings from Ratebeer to an excel document. Next step – get it into @97bottles.

Clueless VBA

  • has sold out and joined a VBA forum. These geeks know their stuff and cheaper than a book
  • I write code like a moron sometimes….VBA needs an infinite loop breaker of some kind too just for people like me when I do something dumb.
  • Holy Hell if you haven’t had to deal with Excel dates in your code, feel lucky!
  • Think I should have tested my clueless vba on one or two records, not all 146…

_____________

Similar Posts