- I hate Psysc 241. Statistics is such a waste of my time. All we do is put numbers into excel. And make graphs. #pointless
- When in doubt, add a pivot table. You will look and feel smarter. #excel #plotthedata
- I really need to read a good book. Think I forgot how. Academia might kill my love of the printed word. Or maybe Excel will. #adminoverkill
- Work is feeling a bit like groundhogday lately. I blame Excel.
- No, I love Excel, but am mired in backwards compatibility problems.
- Gorgeous gf just told me to "stop putting jokes in the spreadsheet". Probably sums up our relationship quite well.
- I’m so happy to see u tweet about excel and not some exotic fun work !
- You know you’re serious when you get the old Microsoft Excel out. Gonna make me some graphs.
- I’m always amazed at work that people who "can’t do computers" knock out these complicated excel sheets without a second thought
- I hate Excel. I need a spreadsheet tutor. Any volunteers? Nope, didn’t think so.
- Eww. Coworker just tickled my elbow b/c I helped him w/ Excel. This isn’t a TV work environment where we act bizarrely close! No touching!
- One year worth of text messages in one spreadsheet. obsessive or thorough?
- The Excel sheets I spent forever and a day creating crashed. That’s fantastic. I love having to do my homework twice.
- Trying to make an Excel spreadsheet for 20mins, boss goes "just ask someone to send you the one that’s already made"
- A guy walked past me in Victoria Station and said ‘I love Excel spreadsheets’ Well good for you, hope for your sake that was sarcasm.
- You know it’s a slow day at work when you are considering an Excel spreadsheet on possibilities of what we can have for dinner…
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Excel can help you look after Grandma, stop your heart, and learn how magnets work. What other program can do all that?
Would you put your resumé into Excel, or put Excel into your resumé? And what colours would you use – the background could be important!
Yes, that fan sound is frightening, knowing that Excel could crash at any time. Make a pivot table, and you’ll feel beastly again.
Should you learn C? Relearn VB? Or will you just stick with Excel? Whatever you decide, bring on the coffee.
If you’re providing Excel help at the local bar, don’t drink too much! You’ll end up putting in faulty VLOOKUPs, or getting into a crash (and not the Excel kind).
Is that the icy-cold grip of Excel you’re feeling, or just a winter storm headed your way? 
If you can’t figure out how to make an Excel chart, don’t get out the tack hammer. Just watch a few YouTube videos and eat some Doritos.
When you’re up to workbook 209, and Excel is giving you chest pains, it’s time to leave. But if you learn a few fancy formulas, tomorrow might be easier.
Remember – an extra $ in your Excel VBA code could cost you extra dollars! On the other hand, buying Excel for Dummies could save you some money, as long as you don’t try to make a 3-D chart like the one on the cover.
If you’re struggling with Excel, a tasty Cinnabon might help prevent a hissy fit – and it would taste better than nibbling on your fingernails.
Are you a chronic Save button pusher? That’s a good thing – you never know when a lynx might attack your Excel file.
Any movie that features Excel must be good, right? Even if that unattractive Brad Pitt is co-starring with our favourite dashing spreadsheet.
Does it really matter if the Excel chart is green or purple? Maybe it matters to a dinosaur – and Kermit the Frog would definitely prefer green.
While you wait for the guys in the long white jackets to arrive, you can clean up your workbooks by deleting the unused tabs. Try to avoid eye contact with all the nerdy people around you.
If you’re too tired to work today, just open an Excel file, so you look organized, and your boss will be impressed. Or, just spend the day staring at a lava lamp.
Merry Christmas! I hope Excel is helping you keep the names straight on your greeting cards to the neighbours!