Category: Excel Humor

Maybe an important scientist in an 80s movie could work on finding a cure for conditional formatting — or jolt the old, dead version back to life.

• How did people work before Starbucks and Excel?!?
• It actually annoys me just how OCD I get when it comes to spreadsheet layouts. Not enough to stop the OCD though.
• I just used a spreadsheet and it was easy and not at all a chore.
• I love making spreadsheets pretty. There are too many ugly Excel docs in this world.
• I am going to set Excel on fire. Why oh why will conditional formatting not work? Bring back old excel you knew where you were with that
• How can a senior not know abt pivot table? It’s like an essential for our profession!!
• I unlocked an achievement this week: Excel Pivot Table Master!
• just another day in this loveless marriage with Microsoft Excel
• whenever i work in excel i pretend to myself i’m a very important scientist in an 80s movie
• Why is excel set to hide grid lines when you print by default? Waste of paper. If I didn’t want gridlines I wouldn’t be using a spreadsheet
• Feeling empowered! VS volunteer Dale & I just battled a giant spreadsheet that was deemed "impossible" to convert into Excel/labels…& won!
• Today I made an Excel worksheet to keep track of my money, and realised I don’t have a whole lot of it. Fun exercise!
• You don’t need expensive estimating software. You need to learn to harness the almighty Pivot Table. #innerdorkrevealed
• Can I get that in a spreadsheet? Sure, just hold my shoe box with my elephant in it.
• Opening up an excel spreadsheet is like pulling open the curtains in your hotel room to look out onto a brick wall.
• who is "another user" and why do they have my content spreadsheet locked!?
• Yes. I spent time putting cond. formatting, data validation etc. into the spreadsheet to help me procrastinate – I mean focus …

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Tips and Tutorials

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Whether you’re helping your baby, your spouse, or your mom, family time always goes better with Excel.

• Ok time to PANIC!.. Ive lost the main spreadsheet for reporting.. can everyone check their desks, drawers, etc in case they have it? kkthnx
• I need to learn excel. It’s super complicated and hard to use, but super useful at work! Are there courses at NUS?
• staring at a spreadsheet wondering the best way to play with the data…wonder if a lie down will help
• I draft all my tweets in a large Microsoft Excel spreadsheet so it looks like I’m doing important work.
• Tryin 2 help my mom wit a spreadsheet on excel..she has NO patience wit these things [email protected] imma jus do it for her so she don’t irritate me
• Finally leaving work, if only I knew enough about excel I could’ve been home many hours ago
• Hey Excel is messin with me too. Lets wait for him round the corner after work tomorrow and kick his ass.
• Great, been staring at green excel columns for long enough that I’m seeing purple columns everywhere else I look
• The cleaner has just cleaned my desk whilst I was sat at it. She entered random characters into my spreadsheet as she wiped the keyboard.
• Trying to fix my wife’s spreadsheet and NOTHING stays fixed!
• I’m making an invoice in Excel. it’s as exciting as it sounds.
• Victory – managed to get an excel spreadsheet to save AND keep its formatting AND formulae. My logic and Excel’s usually mismatch.
• The teacher would be like ‘Open excel and complete the spreadsheet at [web address]’, didn’t tell us how. So we didn’t.
• Because I am some kind of manager, I would lilke to do {thing} using a spreadsheet. This is true for almost all known values of thing.
• Family BBQ this weekend; email chain a mile long; family of CPA’s–an Excel spreadsheet to list all the food planned was inevitable.
• Dahlia and I will be working on baby’s first spreadsheet today. Gotta learn Excel at some point.
• Surely I’m not the only who counts down the days to a vacation with a spreadsheet.

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Related Links:

• Excel Data Entry Tips
• Excel Tips and Tutorials

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Who knew that spreadsheets could help you meet new friends, or at least be accosted by strangers on the street?

• Just learned how to make charts in Excel. Slightly weirded out by the fact that I now have a job that requires this.
• Creating a spreadsheet of possible short fiction markets. Not a nerd. Shut up.
• Microsoft Excel is pretty much the best thing ever, except when it’s being a pain in the ass. Which is freaking ALWAYS
• I, um, only discovered the "countif" function in Excel last week. Half a statistical PhD! Might have finished it if I’d known.
• Staring into the abyss of an Excel spreadsheet. I’m damn sure it’s staring back at me, and winning.
• I’m making a spreadsheet to make sure I watch Buffy and Angel in air date order.
• I reckon I will soon be talking in excel formulas.. 🙁
• Microsoft got it right with Excel. I hate supporting Microsoft. I hate Bill Gates. No one should have that kind of money. But I love Excel.
• just saw a man on K street wearing my "i love spreadsheets" t-shirt. obv i stopped him and we bonded over our mutual love of excel.
• Spent 5 minutes of "making spreadsheet" time on scratching mosquito bites. Smh
• Happiness is discovering a new Excel trick that just saved me lots of time…absolute cell ref. OK, maybe that’s "duh" but I’m happy 🙂
• When in doubt, make another spreadsheet.
• I think my screen hates Excel.. It starts buzzing every time I open a spreadsheet… Seriously! #Weird
• I keep track of all the jobs I apply for on a spreadsheet. I named the first tab of 80+ applied to, FAIL and started a new tab called Take 2
• No job should ever be described as an ‘exciting opportunity’ if it involves Excel.
• you know you don’t need guns to take down the government. Just a simple worm that uninstalls Excel. Ha

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Data Entry Tips
• Excel Tips and Tutorials

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It’s a holiday here in Canada, so I’ll keep this short. Otherwise, I might "loose" my mind! That could be dangerous.

• Budgeting for our wedding. Have a tab in spreadsheet called ‘Budget’ and one called ‘Actual’. Let’s see how this goes…
• So at 4:51pm my boss gives me an Excel assignment to formulate. Keep in mind it’s Friday & I was suppose to be in my car at 5:01pm.
• Tried to do some "real work" with Apple’s Numbers spreadsheet. Uh yeah. Stick to the fun and creative stuff, Apple. Back to Excel in Vmware.
• Swimming complete, train tickets bought, chickens cleaned. Now for freetime spreadsheet fun
• On the plus side, one of them is keeping me amused by using a calculator to add together the numbers from her Excel spreadsheet. Classic.
• agreed. All of the cool kids organize via spreadsheet. I’d loose my mind without mine.
• Why oh why did I decide to spend my life looking at Excel sheets?
• Wow. I just got a freight calculating spreadsheet that I made for my old boss over 8yrs ago. I left 3yrs ago, and they still use it.
• I’m setting up an excel spreadsheet. Twitching already #notgoodwithnumbers
• I LOVE MICROSOFT EXCEL!! I could be on here all day and make up a billion spread sheets and schedules…I should be the new Walrus Boy… :/
• The type of bike ride where I remember I live in a thriving metropolis not an excel spreadsheet.
• Trying to work on Excel and have one of my kid’s songs stuck in my head… aaaargh
• I want a snarky excel chart where the categories are "times religion has said world will end soon" and "times the world has ended"
• All the gas I bought in July has HST but the spreadsheet to get my $ back from my employer calculates automatically the GST.
• Excel spreadsheet: almost as horrifying as blank word doc.

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Wedding Planner
• Excel Tips and Tutorials

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Is there any proof that a man invented pivot tables? Or just an assumption?

• There are about 73 different graph and chart types in Excel and I think the Powerpoint I’m reading contains all of them. #deathbypowerpoint
• What would u do if u lost a grant for $900k bc you forgot to fill in one worksheet of 12 excel workbooks consisting of over 200 worksheets
• Cranky as hell and being forced to work on Excel balance sheets. 🙂
• If this excel spreadsheet was a ukelele I’d smash it over the head of whoever password protected it.
• Hey, my 220MB .xls spreadsheet keeps crashing my Excel! Fix it! O_O <facepalm>
• … Excuse me. I need to go scream into something soft and thick. The last hour’s worth of work has been gobbled by Excel …
• Oh can I just say, I really hate it when people bring their babies into work. It’s not fun for anybody involved. Babies don’t like Excel.
• hahaa sometimes I do crazy dances if I solved a tricky Excel problem 😛
• Just said the words "I love Excel and pretty spreadsheets." If I start mentioning acronyms like ROI or KPI, someone come smack me.
• I have a big excel sheet w/ a gazillion functions in it and my head just formed a huge knot… 🙁
• Earned my Excel "Junior Ninja" badge yesterday. Now I want to VLOOKUP everything and put it into a Pivot Table.
• I made my first pretty Excel spreadsheet; work is getting to me.
• A simple, "Let’s spend a weekend in the Poconos." has turned itself into an Excel spreadsheet comparing HomeAway rentals. I love my wife.
• God bless the man that invented Excel pivot tables …
• This English major has spent way too much time with Excel this week. We need to break up but our codependency issues are off the chart.

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel VLOOKUP Function

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From now on, each of my Excel files will be referred to as "a ripping piece of awesome".

• My dyslexic tendencies are kind of pesky, considering I work on excel and with numbers all day.
• Just built an Excel worksheet to calculate time-lapse movie values. Very cool, if I do say so myself. #fb
• Why does every version of Word and Excel get less user friendly?!? I don’t want my graph made out of bubbles!!!
• My work PC is gonig to drive me to drink. It shouldn’t take ten seconds to bold a row in Excel.
• EXCEL FINGER CRAAAMP! OWWW! This spreadsheet is going to be a ripping piece of awesome, though, so it’s totally worth it.
• We have an excel file at work that many people need to update and it’s constantly being used when I need it! So annoying! Get a database!
• Spent ages trying to work out why Excel thought 15+16+17 totalled 47. (I’d set my columns too narrow, and it had rounded 16.5 and 15.5)
• How did people do mind numbing Excel charts before iPods and iced green tea?
• A chart about Norw-Den-English trade from 1786, from the first modern chart book. If only excel had this elegance. http://bit.ly/9n6IOt
• I’m an excel spreadsheet genius! Didn’t think I’d ever say that! Or even need to, for that matter!
• I think I need to reevaluate my life. I find Excel to be very relaxing. I came into work in a horrible mood, now I’m in a very zen place.
• It’s a specific kind of person that gets overly excited when a big spreadsheet finally begins to work right. What’s happening to me?
• One of the template options when you open Excel is "21st Century Donut Chart".Really disappointed this had nothing to do w/ actual donuts.

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel SUM Functions
• Excel Tips and Tutorials

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Do you think the people from the first two tweets work in the same office?

• not really feelin this work thing today. who on twitter tryna see me in EXCEL Battleship?!?! lol.
• Why is it that I always ends up doing other peoples Excel work. 🙁
• So you have to colour-code a spreadsheet. What’s the first colour you go for? … That’s right. Bubble gum pink.
• I can pivot-table 65k lines of data in my mac with 5 key strokes, this PC I couldnt even find the "Save As".
• Making Excel spreadsheets look pretty and making sure formulas work properly since this morning.
• #overheard "Dude, Excel ROCKS! I love it you can do so much with the filters". // HA! Office nerd.
• Well, that spreadsheet destroyed the part of my brain I wanted to hold on to….
• Aah, my eyes! This spreadsheet colouring seems to be the worst of the 1960s depicted via the medium of artificially coloured vomit
• LOVE IT when I find an error in one excel-generated graph that causes me to have to redo 15 slides.
• My coworker is talking to his spreadsheet and singing it songs. Sad what you have to do to make Excel work.
• I wish there was a cross between Excel and Word. Excel spreadsheet but Word abilities within the cell… That would be sweet!
• Literally, this is how a problem is explained that I’m needed to help with. "I can’t make it go ‘bzzzzz’ around the cell [in Excel]." #FML
• my boss today: ‘so the client is wondering why his excel file doesn’t light up like a Christmas tree and do an automatic song and dance?’
• Just overheard someone in the office refer to a spreadsheet as a "spreado". If I ever use that particular piece of posh slang, shoot me.
• Trying to think of how to create a spreadsheet that will accomplish today’s tasks…I think excel is my adult security blanket.
• I love waking up with a solution to a problem, knowing my subconscious has been working on it in my sleep. Today it was about a spreadsheet.
• You’re teaching a 4-year-old to write code?"Well certainly I don’t want him out there, you know, learning Excel macros ON THE STREET!

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel VBA

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Wow, how big is that person’s monitor? I can only see 975 full cells on mine (at 100%), and my eyes are sore at the end of the day.

• I think I just installed 100TB of microsoft products in order to be able to spend a couple of hours reviewing a spreadsheet.
• @keithlaw Baseball is played on a field, not a spreadsheet, Keith. <== my impression of a dinosaur
• excel, you are killiing meee!!! When I say that I don’t want borders on the chart, that doens’t mean you can leave a bottom border!!!!!!
• Note to self: when calculations within program take massive amounts of time, blame MS Excel interop first and foremost
• After making fun of colleague’s lack of skill w/Excel, the file he sends me on last day of work is corrupted. He gets the last laugh.
• my new monitor allows me to see 2,470 cells in Excel at once.. spreadsheet heaven..
• Then the most common thing heard is "Dave, you know computers. Can you help me with this – I dunno how to use excel"
• So the database I’ve spent the whole day working on was actually meant to be a spreadsheet. Copy and paste, my life is in your hands
• And now the accounts. Excel hates me more than the dog does, so this should be…fun. *Headdesk!*
• I know a state agency that keeps their entire database in an excel spreadsheet backed up on a flash drive. #stuffofnightmares
• Excel 2007 is stupid!!! I want my chart wizard back!
• I love Excel/Spreadsheets it’s just like Lego (my childhood favorite) because I’m a spreadsheet monkey & can build anything in Excel! #fb
• he’s not joking about the spreadsheet. 100% nerd. But 100% AWESOME!!
• definitely couldn’t do a job that normally involves this much excel spreadsheet action

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Data Entry Tips
• Excel Tips and Tutorials

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Uh-oh! I use Excel for work, and for leisure, and I think pivot tables are cool. Maybe it’s time for a nap.

• It is absolutely inexcusable when someone makes an error on an important Excel spreadsheet. Unless, of course, that someone is me… 😉
• The main problem with making coffee with Excel is that the fluid dynamic simulation takes up too many CPU cycles.
• I am about to start to swearing … Going to take my nicely formatted excel spreadsheet and bugger it up in google docs so we can share it
• so i spend the day working out what was wrong with my spreadsheet & now that i’ve got it i’ve a whole new set of problems. haha! grrrreat.
• I say I hate numbers but then I start bashing them into excel & what they tell me is *so* empowering that I realise that I really LOVE them.
• Wow. I just downloaded the Afghan war on excel, blow by blow. Yes, a spreadsheet. http://bit.ly/aVVDDZ (Via Guardian) It’s a Groundswell
• Someone described business school to me as making charts in Excel and presenting them. Thought that was pretty funny.
• Think this may officially be the most absurd spreadsheet I’ve ever written, and it’s still going to get worse. It’s bloody awesome though!
• excel 2007 pie of pie charts are the bane of my existence right now
• They finally gave me Excel 2007 at work. I guess I’ll get 2010 in 3 years?
• Excel for work, Excel for leisure. I wonder where I am heading.
• Honestly is minor math and excel work really that difficult? I’m starting to think for some people it is.
• billing reports = evil on a spreadsheet ugh
• I should just not think about the lottery. Whenever I do, I somehow end up making a spreadsheet.
• Was going to start updating an investments spreadsheet, but figure a nap is really a better use of my time.
• I never wanted to be the type of person that looked at a pivot table off a giant data cube and said ‘cooool!’

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Tips and Tutorials

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Maybe it’s the 11-year-old who’s taking his time to finish that spreadsheet. If it’s someone else, I hope the boss doesn’t read Twitter!

• taking my time doing this Excel spreadsheet for my boss. i coulda finished it in 5mins, but ill give it to her in 30 *shrugs*
• Showed 11yr old step-son how to use Excel. He’s been making a spreadsheet of ATL restaurants for us. #childlabor
• we named excel @ work Lecxe, like a fancy Lexi. & we tell the excel go to guy that Lecxe is a bitch when it something doesnt work right.
• Excel question: Anyone know how to make excel dispense beer? That would be really helpful about now.
• life decisions in excel spreadsheet format. My world’s have collided!
• Time to build a stronger relationship w/ excel spreadsheet. I can smell monday already
• the only words I like in conjunction with ‘spread’ are ‘chocolate’ and ‘bed’… none of this ‘sheet’ business. Excel confuses me!
• Rule #1 – the critically important Excel spreadsheet you are looking for on you computer will never be found, ever; it’s lost, forever dude
• Examining the hidden Excel data in a telco’s PPT chart, I found far more data than they intended to release. If only I could read Russian.
• was spending a perfectly wasteful saturday. At some point a blank spreadsheet got involved, now its 14Mb and i have a stiff neck. damn!
• Fighting the urge to bypass Excel and make pretty charts in Illustrator 🙂
• Time to make a sexy spreadsheet about how much money college loans will cost me. Spoiler: Too much.
• It might just be me, patsy cline, and this very large excel file for the rest of the night.
• I would look at your spreadsheet but have just discovered I dont have excel
• You know you work a lot in Excel when you have a Book5 and a Book100 open simultaneously.
• A summary pivot table?! There goes my weekend.

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Tips and Tutorials

MacGyver it into Excel. I like that, and we’ve probably all done it, without knowing what to call it!

• Fixed the first Excel problem of the day – a nested IF that the user claimed was misbehaving.
• No matter how hard I look at this spreadsheet, the numbers aren’t going to change. **sighs**
• How could I have not written down what the colors on my spreadsheet mean? 6 months later and I can’t remember. #fail
• Constructing an excel spreadsheet of what i want to see at Edinburgh next month. Makes it look like i’m doing work
• I Win T Shirt –>>"I love Macros” t-shirts" ; ) http://blogs.msdn.com/b/excel/
• you can call me Chart Master: Keeper of Excel.
• Awwww I’ve just discovered a flaw in my mega spreadsheet, after I’ve made multiple copies for different scenarios…. sigh….
• right…..this spreadsheet won’t build itself you know………….which is a shame cause my VBA macro is called "self_building_spreadsheet"
• Things I really need to work on: VBA in Excel and using API’s – both for reporting and data manipulation… so much, so little time.. 😐
• Is the such a thing as Excelitis. An aversion to Excel which prevents you going to work if it uses Excel?
• I still prefer not to handle large amounts of data in Excel, but I have to grudgingly admit that pivot tables do lessen the pain.
• Just worked out I spend R1200 more than I earn EVERY month. Filled it all out on a spreadsheet and am STILL confused as to how it happens.
• Yeah a little bit. That would be great. I could try to Macgyver it into Excel. Hopefully it will work 🙂
• I’m pretty sure a spreadsheet just wrecked my day.
• Excel ’03 punishes me for saving often by destroying my undo history.

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel VBA

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Have you ever been distracted from Excel by your fried bee hoon? No, it’s not caused by sitting on a deck chair that’s been baking in the sun, when you take your laptop outside to work.

• I click on an internal webpage link on who to contact in another department… and it DOWNLOADS AN EXCEL SPREADSHEET. Really? REALLY?! #FAIL
• Starting to think setting off code to double loop 300k cells in Excel was a bad idea on my netbook (sips coffee)
• Typing gym workouts into an Excel document. My holidays from work are WILD so far.
• My fried beehoon is distracting me from my excel :<
• i am now known as the excel wizard, this is good and bad, awesome to be known for something sucks cause i now get more work haha
• Why does no one go on dragons den with an excel spreadsheet and a set of financial projections.
• when they ask me to do an Excel spreadsheet at work I be thinkin you want a GOOD one or like just an informative one??
• Still working. Just wondering whether to re-do the spreadsheet I accidently didn’t save earlier today or pack up for the evening.
• Oh yes, I also screwed up explaining how pivot tables work. I hope they don’t think I was exaggerating my Excel expertise.
• New computer monitor at work. I can now see all of columns from A to Z in excel without scrolling. Today is a special day.
• Does being given more Excel spreadsheet tasks mean you are moving up in an organization? #doom
• Is it too geeky to use a spreadsheet to choose a diamond ring to propose?
• Me thinks me need another coffee, got some excel vba code to try to sort written by someone else!!!!

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel VBA

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A pie chart wrapped in a donut chart? Is that the Excel version of a KFC Double Down?

• Person says: "reformat" I think: "computers. reinstall OS." Coworker thinks: "Excel spreadsheet. Move data round." #perspective
• Everyone at my workplace is crazy for Excel & spreadsheets. Everyone.
• today I learnt how to do pivot tables in Excel. what have I become
• I just looked up how to use division in an Excel cell. I now feel completely stupid.
• I just want everyone to know I got my ass handed to me by a excel spreadsheet! I forgot so much in 10 years I’d like to blame booze and time
• long day superceded by fountain show at the bellagio, and potentially le cirque? worse places to wrangle with excel i suppose.
• Just spent pretty much the entire day cleaning a huge, messy spreadsheet for data upload.. Just been emailed a ‘new’ version to use. *anger*
• my parents made a spreadsheet n all of it is adding in the thousands smh.. N it’s mainly food
• Excel help: How do I make a pie chart with a donut chart around it showing subdivisions within each slice?
• I’m going to have to climb back into the wrong end of an Excel spreadsheet again soon. I don’t think there is a right end.
• Plus side of my work desktop hosing today. Finally got rid of a stupid excel bug that’s plagued me for the past 4 years #repairedbyaccident
• This budget spreadsheet is kicking my ass. Note to self: comprehend math better.
• There are people in this old world who think in spreadsheet. Sadly, I’m not one.

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Tips and Tutorials

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Yelling, cursing, and True Blood. That’s how we work with Excel — sorry Mom.

• La Boss: Here is disc with 10,000 records of data. Give it to me in a spreadsheet. Me: Wuuuuuuuuhhhh.
• Be still my beating chart. It seems that since my PhD I have *entirely* forgotten how to draw a graph in Excel. #headhurty
• you know what’s wrong with our relationship? Check my excel spreadsheet. -anonymous
• If MS Excel is the most popular and powerful spreadsheet software in the world then why is it so counter intuitive? Answers on a postcard.
• Workin on this budgeting spreadsheet for this Grad class.. I had no clue I was spending this much money.. smh, sorry Mom
• friend of mine has a spreadsheet with every concert he’s ever been to. impressive. i can’t even remember what i saw last night.
• have shouted and problem has progressed, excel now working but still no mail! Will shout some more!
• One hour’s worth of Microsoft Excel work swirling down the "Microsoft Excel (not responding)" drain. Save first, apply fancy format later.
• I love cursing Excel for not working correctly only to find that I was the one doing it wrong. #usererror
• My computer in work is gettin update from excel 03 to 07, don’t like it, it’s hard to use! I like simple! SIMPLE I SAY!!
• I need to pick the brains of a spreadsheet guru (this makes me sound like a creepy stalker, argh!)
• True Blood and Excel Spreadsheets. I just love preparing for meetings.
• Someone please teach me how to work Microsoft excel. Please?
• I’m delighted – small miracles but I just created an Excel Formula which will save me about 1 day of work! 1hr to create! Yes!
• Just created an Excel file that will save 20 people 2+ hours / month. My work here is done!
• Tomorrow involves reverse engineering a rather archaic excel spreadsheet; much fun to be had.
• I love creating simple games in Excel that I can share with co-workers. Just don’t tell my boss.

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel VBA
• Excel Tips and Tutorials

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Spreadsheet coma? I’ve had that. Usually caused by ingesting large quantities of Excel.

• My mouse wheel doesn’t work in Excel. My job duties are primarily concerned w/ data analysis. No witty hashtag; it’d simply be expletives.
• Excel VBA is my paintbrush, these General Ledger spreadsheets are my canvas, and Kaskade is my muse. Time for the artist to work…
• yup, at Google almost all projects are managed with just a Google spreadsheet. 😉
• My husband is the awesomest person ever. And I’m not just saying that b/c I exploited his love of Excel for my own personal project. #fb
• I declare the Pivot Table to be the most awesome thing EVER.
• Cannot internet today. I haz a spreadsheet coma. #Mondays
• I LOVE lists; just made an Excel spreadsheet w/ everything needed for camping for the week, & it’s all color coded. My #OCD at it’s finest!
• nothing like a wendy’s spicy chicken sandwich to counter a long day of spreadsheet editing.
• I keep a spreadsheet of the number of days w/out smoking. Sometimes not wanting to mess that up is the only thing that saves me.
• I just calculated that it takes 142000 ants to cover 1 km but excel was naughty and gave me wrong calculations it seems. 🙂
• I appear to have a one-track mind today. This is what Spreadsheets do to me. Don’t let Excel happen to you… or someone you love #justsayno
• I hope I didn’t look stupid lying my ass off about my excel skills…only to find out I had to take a skill assessment test >.<
• The shorter route to "Paste as a value" in Excel 2010 is the best thing in Office 2010 so far!!!
• I wish I could turn this excel workbook into a glass plate and smash it against the wall
• #Excel 2007 file size: 63 MB. Same file saved as csv file? 8 MB. Gotta love Excels efficiency and space saving there.
• Gantt Charts look sexier when created in MS Excel. Gantt Chart in MS Project is like vermiform appendix in human body – useless!
• My kids leave in 48 hours for vacation. I’m dealing with this by ingesting large quantities of microsoft excel.
• I hate spreadsheets and have one to do now. You’re either a spreadsheet kind of person or not and I’m soooo not.
• Have spent most of my day making a spreadsheet of HR pages on intranet. Most of which are out of date or irrelevant.

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Tips and Tutorials

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Organization or procrastination? Who hasn’t asked that question?

• Boo, lost my stolen wifi at work. Looks like its excel spreadsheet time for me. #needinternetnow
• Hubby brought home fazolis. To bribe me to double check an accounting spreadsheet for him. Still way easier than cooking.
• I either need someone to come over and decode this spreadsheet for me… or I need more coffee. *crickets* Ok… more coffee it is then. BRB
• If you just sit at work staring at a spreadsheet, doing nothing, no one will question what youre doing. This is me for the nxt 3 hours.
• Just wasted a whole tree printing an excel workbook that wasn’t formatted properly 🙁
• OpenHeatMap "Turn your spreadsheet into a map" http://www.openheatmap.com/
• Playing Russian roulette with MS Excel. How long to wait for it to respond before it shreds my afternoon’s work (again)?
• Sent an email back to legal: I need help understanding this excel spreadsheet in order to meet your deadline. Monday will be interesting!
• Sometimes fixing a complex Excel spreadsheet is like de-bugging code – one damn little ‘ throws everything off….
• coffee, powerpoint, spreadsheet, repeat.
• I’m going cross eyed from staring at excel sheets and endless numbers. How do people work in auditing?
• Computer is worse than foreign language. i guess so . I don’t need Excel to live. just for work. or i might be needless 4 me ever
• All right, I’m making an Excel spreadsheet for all my projects. One for editing, one for writing. Organization or procrastinating?

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Related Links:

• Excel VBA
• Excel Tips and Tutorials

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Dr. Who villains and boozy Excel work — it must be the weekend!

• 14 years of programming experience and I’m tasked with building an excel spreadsheet …sheesh. #mindnumbing
• Excellent graph! -> Every Doctor Who villain since 1963 – as a spreadsheet and visualized guardian.co.uk http://bit.ly/doL5qn #doctorwho
• Just an FYI. Excel files > 100 MB generally don’t work well.
• Just discovered how to make Pivot Tables in Excel. A whole new world of data analysis lies before me. 🙂
• There was a well dressed businessman on the tube updating an Excel spreadsheet on his laptop and swigging from a full sized bottle of wine
• Ok I’m pretty sure i’ve exhausted pivot tables and consolidating data on Excel….
• Excel is enough to drive anyone to drink, particularly if it’s the out of date 2003 version I am forced to use at work! Lol
• I think I just made my first genuine (as in useful) pie chart. So thats’ what Excel is for!
• The opposite of love is not hate. It’s indifference. I indifference you Excel. Macros are stupid. Throw rocks at them.
• Best nights sleep ever! Feel fantastic today! Shame I am stuck in front of an excel spreadsheet 🙁
• I don’t need a wizard with Excel for what I am trying to do at work right now. I think I need an actual wizard. #MerlinWhereAreYou
• I am having trouble tearing my eyes away from this Doctor Who villains spreadsheet. Oh random lists and statistics I love you so.

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Tips and Tutorials

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Stupidification? Do you really need Excel to help with that? I’m not surprised by that "Booze" category though.

• Killer feature in #Office2010 ? Excel Slicers! Not for everyone but brilliant for ppl that use pivot tables.
• Forms should not be created in Excel. Trying to enter this data is one of the more annoying things I have done in a long time.
• While you’re on FarmVille, I’m working on an Excel spreadsheet. On the whole, I think I get the better part of the bargain.
• OH in meeting: "Can you please create that Excel workbook in Word so it shows up when I look at the network drive within Word?" *Head/Desk*
• I *heart* Excel. I just love being able to do stuff with it that makes everyone at work impressed 🙂
• Excel has two roles: (1) spreadsheet, and (2) a highly efficient software design stupidification process.
• Stupid Excel. It could have at least told me that I’d missed that all-important ^2
• So, I’m doing an excel spreadsheet for my monthly finances, and I literally have a row labeled "Booze" under expenses…
• Should be out running, but need to work. Exercise beaten by Excel. This is why I’m fat but good at pivot tables…
• I’m a creative person… I created a spreadsheet today.
• Somehow I’ve been granted the title ‘Excel Chart King’ therefore any charts that need doing they come to me …
• I was only fiddling around with an excel spreadsheet then the next thing I notice and it’s 4:45pm. the last I looked at the clock was lunch
• Now hiring an #excel genius to help me edit a 2900 line workbook. I pay in cookies and milk!
• Cake and Excel Macros. It’s a love-hate kind of thing
• When working on a spreadsheet periodically click the save button. Nothing worse than doing a whole spreadsheet and then losing it. #advice
• you couldn’t even keep a song on the charts if your parents were made of Microsoft excel #NickiRunsBillboard

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Tips and Tutorials

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You must have to be young, to be "gangster". I can barely see the Excel sheet when it’s zoomed to 80%.

• OH: we have a google spreadsheet to keep track of who is the biggest jerk in the office. 1 point for a jerk out burst.
• So, Microsoft, my hard-won pivot table in Excel 2007 won’t refresh You want me to create the table anew each day? I scoff. Waste of a week!
• actually managed to fix someone else’s excel problem today! OMG!!!
• I am growing weary of creating Excel column charts. Am starting to add strange colors and fills to entertain myself.
• has to admit. There is something very #gangster abt working #spreadsheet at 50% scale. Very #gangster
• Giddy with joy at discovering Excel’s "manual calculation" option. Ahhhhhhh….. Control over monstrous recalcuating times.
• I think business colleges should host Excel spreadsheet/workbook etiquette courses instead of dining…
• And huzzah! after a month of waiting, i finally got my dual monitor set up at work! now i can have excel on one screen and code on the other
• Room full of people just "ooohed" over learning the concatenate function in Excel. I love it.
• Temping at an office. Spent whole day on Excel spreadsheet and now see entire world in formatted grids. Medical term: Excel Format Disorder
• I guess I shouldn’t be surprised that "10" comes before "9" in Excel. We are not all comp sci nerds that count 00, 01, 02, 03…
• As close as I’ll ever be to operating in the Stone Age. Tables and charts in Word. Come on – Excel is on your computer for a reason people!!
• At this time of night, when in Dublin, I should not be sitting in front of an excel spreadsheet…!
• my boss asked me for help cause he broke the excel file i made yesterday and i fixed in 10 sec! feel like a superwoman now
• I hate when I have this awesome idea to do something in Excel and I can’t get it to work. Grrrrrrr!
• My co-worker doesn’t "know" how to use Excel so she wants me to create a spreadsheet for her…cute..but no…we aren’t on the same payroll.
• Needs to get on with design work today, I’m not sure I have my creative head on though. Someone get me a spreadsheet pronto.
• Was going nuta trying to find an Excel Worksheet I was working on last night, when I realized "last night" means home laptop, not work’s.

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Tips and Tutorials

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A better solution for preventing sharing nightmares? Don’t create shared workbooks. The end.

• Spreadsheet modeling has evolved into a medium for managerial Machiavellis – Michael Schrage
• haha… Next time don’t write that you have advanced excel skills in your resume…
• Dear Microsoft, your chart feature of Excel o’s awful. Please hire some Apple designers to fix your terrible product.
• Information presented in a smart way using pictures and images makes ur excel generated pie chart looks like doodles #infographic
• this spreadsheet i’m crafting is making my brain hurt, but if i stop now for lunch, it’ll be way too tough to get back in gear afterwards…
• Watching @hardlyaverage wrangle a spreadsheet into submission. She’s just shouted "yes!" so I assume she won!
• How’s my afternoon going? Broke pivot table. Fixed pivot table. The end.
• Omg!! I am not that fluent with IF statements in Excel and my boss wants me to add formulas to this spreadsheet… #FML
• Is it wrong that I’m super excited about getting an updated version of Excel at work? Sometimes it’s the little things.
• love it how i asked for an Excel spreadsheet from a coworker, and the document i got was titled "suck it.xlsx" #workplacehumor
• Just lost power at work. Thank God I had just saved the massive Excel file I was working on!
• a peanut butter sandwich and a total surrender from any more excel work was just the ticket for tonight…
• Getting my Excel-fu on and putting those rows to work. Second day of holiday being spent at work…
• Stop Excel abuse! This could have easily been included in the email body. http://yfrog.com/j4e1laj
• no, it’s still not possible to sensibly cram three dimensions of data into a 2d Excel spreadsheet no matter how many times you ask.
• Idea for MS Excel: "Are you still working?" nags when workbook not used for 10 mins to prevent sharing nightmare #mswish #excel
• I’ve now spent twice as much time making a spreadsheet for the teas in my cupboard than doing my homework for today. Priorities FTW.
• I dont think I actually miss excel, I miss the feeling of being invincible when I code it to do what I want….and it works.

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Tips and Tutorials

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If a master chef doesn’t like pivot tables, maybe he should just stick to pie charts. And remember, even though the football is over, football will be starting soon.

• trying to modify an existing Excel pivot table is making me stabby
• This morning I need cheerleading… and very strong coffee!! Transferring a year’s worth of accounts onto spreadsheet…
• I’m back! the spreadsheet didnt kill me!!not that interested in the football. am just about to start a spreadsheet to plan the budget on some home improvements. exciting huh?!
• In the future, Excel will have a "Like" button in the corner of every cell, and your boss will conduct your annual review over Bebo chat
• making an Excel spreadsheet schedule of my 2nd year of grad school. looks like sleep isn’t even an option anymore. awesome.
• This spreadsheet is good….but it would be better if it were in pink and purple. Fix this AT ONCE.
• How hard can be it be to change the legend string in an Excel chart? Well very hard, in fact impossible 🙁
• Just got this year’s Football Helmet Schedule .xls spreadsheet. Bit of a tease, considering game 1 is still a billion days away…
• Oh, that heading in this spreadsheet says "tucking". I thought it said something else.
• Practically incensed that Excel won’t do something as simple as make a pie chart with all the tiny values grouped into an "other" slice.
• I didn’t do so hot on my most recent spreadsheet quiz. I argue the quiz was poorly written and too focused on minor details.
• Production meeting imminent. There are pie-charts and excel tables. No coffee. If I’m not tweeting again in 30 minutes call homicide.
• i’m dozing off ): had to expand my excel sheet to 200% so that my eyes can stay open longer!
• Did johnno just slag off Excel? Obviously he’s never used pivot tables #masterchef
• Thank God I remember how to use excel for charts… I almost died trying to make a surface chart on my own lol
• Learning how to do pivot tables in Excel – THAT’s how interesting this game is #worldcup

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Tips and Tutorials

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It’s fine to have VLOOKUP and INDIRECT in the same Excel workbook. Not so sure about Metallica.

• Friends are mocking me for my color-coding, spreadsheet obsession. Is it wrong to be organized? :p
• My table-/chart-making utility for Excel gets a link on the Aific website: http://ow.ly/29yh8 Lots of other interesting software there.
• Had a scare that all the data I’ve been adding to a spreadsheet for a year was gone. Went back to list opened it again…all there!
• When I went upstairs Riley was listening to kids music in iTunes. When I came back he was listening to Metallica creating an Excel doc.
• overheard in my office, "ugh… my Excel spreadsheet always thinks I’m joking!"
• Sometimes it takes a lot of hidden calculating columns in Excel to make one visible cell. That’s one powerful cell.
• just made an ‘improvement’ to a spreadsheet and realized i made it worse – mb it’s snooze time
• Satan and the Spreadsheet: http://www.j-paine.org/blog/jocelyns_cartoons/2010/06/no-earthly-power.html (cartoon).
• Arrived home to discover that 11-yr-old, instructed to pack for upcoming trip, has made a tracking spreadsheet for the effort. #soproud #fb
• I just wasted about half an hour figuring out a spreadsheet that will tell me how behind I am. NICE. :p
• Niece just sent me an excel spreadsheet of all the sf books she owns. Are we related or what?
• It can’t be me cause I do not touch those cells in the spreadsheet. How the formulas disappeared. "?"
• Is it odd that I’m excited to be home from work so I can finally play with Microsoft Excel? #NerdTweet
• You should be a food critic. Get out of the Excel spreadsheets & take some journalism classes. Eat all over the world!
• Note to self: MS Project and Excel are easier to work with after midnight with alcohol by my side
• Great tutorial on beginner excel modeling http://www.solver.com/invcenter.htm , #portfolio , #excel
• Sweet. I just overwrote today’s results file with a blank spreadsheet. So professional of me right?
• I’m using both VLOOKUP and INDIRECT in this Excel workbook. I’m not sure how I feel about that.

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel VLOOKUP Function
• Excel Tips and Tutorials

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Have you run into that Firefox problem, when trying to download from the Microsoft site? I can’t count the times it’s happened to me!

• What a day! 9am to 5pm in one place….all I saw were slides and excel sheets!
• It’s the one skill I kept from those days. Did you know you can add drop shadows to Excel charts?
• tried to download an excel template from Microsoft, foolishly forgetting that I was using Firefox, so of course download didn’t work
• Why there isn’t any single universal programming language!!! Took almost 12 hours to migrate one code snippet from Excel VBA to SQL Server..
• If u work in a stupid office u should know how to use stupid excel, I don’t care how old you are or what u do.
• Working on data visuals ("cartoons," as my boss calls it), i.e. charts & graphs, for a presentation. My unfamiliarity w/ Excel is astounding
• Dear menu writers: prices like 24.0 don’t impress me. They make me think you don’t know how to work Excel.
• Exactly!! We can’t afford something super intense like Visio, but I am getting tired of trying to force Excel to do stuff like this
• Damn. Friends are using Google to figure out the math quiz excel sheet I sent. STUPID CHEATERS! 😛
• Why do the Excel default colours make my spreadsheet look like Blanche’s house in The Golden Girls?
• am I a nerd for enjoying building Pivot Tables in Excel?
• My dad gets Excel jumping through hoops. Me? I get it raising its eyebrow and notifying me that I’m stupid. *Sobs!*
• Microsoft Excel: the methodical way to analyse your enemies.

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel VBA

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It must be the heat — Excel is making people cry, laugh, eat, pull teeth, and even talk to their parents. Now that’s a powerful program!

• Sometimes I believe most that "I’m a poet" when I am working on a spreadsheet.
• I’m having a high noon style standoff with an Excel spreadsheet full of numbers and dollar signs and names. The spreadsheet’s winning.
• This is getting ridiculous. I have to compose a frigging spreadsheet to present to my parents comparing the places to buying an iMac!
• I’d very much like to leave work soon, but Excel doesn’t want to make the graphs I want to see. #ihatespreadsheets
• Thank you internets for answering my Excel formula question before any of the finance gurus at work could.
• ‘Tick tock, on the clock, But the party don’t stop, no’: why does working on Excel trigger R&B tracks in my head? P-diddy Pivot tables!
• Shouldn’t Excel be called ‘Number’? Stupid inconsistent MS nomenclature
• Excel is SO 2007 with it’s pie charts & graphs… time to step up to "infographics"!! Lookin good!http://bit.ly/bWa5yR
• Seriously…that was really easy. Making a chart in excel? Why did that make me cry before?
• New Post Strange flashing of windows icons – Bug in Excel 2010? http://is.gd/djP12
• Reading and editing Excel charts makes me hungry!
• <sigh> you’d think with Excel as the BI front end tool ala power pivot it would play nicer with SSIS by now
• I’ve turned into an Excel whiz who derives a twisted pleasure from creating pretty charts and graphs. Pretty tragic.
• I had a macro running in Excel and everything was fine and then all the sudden it decided it hates me and doesn’t want to work anymore.
• Two and one quarter hours of work left…oh how I can look so involved w/ Excel for that amount of time 🙂
• If by "spreadsheet" you mean MS Excel, then I’m totally with you. I’d rather pull one of my own teeth than work in Excel.
• Ah, sweet granola bar that hiding in my desk drawer…you’re the processed sugar bomb that will get me through this excel spreadsheet!
• He can’t even check if an Excel spreadsheet is accurate. Personally, I blame the education system.
• that’s nothing, I just got index and match to work instead of vlookup in excel… I clapped and laughed

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• PowerPivot for Excel 2010
• Excel VLOOKUP Function

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Do Mac users do any work? Are Google charts better than Excel charts? Is Excel really old-school? So many questions, and it’s too hot to think!

• Everyday without fail Excel crashes everything MS Office related on my work computer. Awesome.
• US Postal Service proposing new rates. Click the "stamp" to download an Excel spreadsheet (21 tabs of info!) http://ht.ly/27Qub
• Note to fiances everywhere – don’t call your bride and quietly say you think you may have messed up our guest list spreadsheet
• I do love excel. Even devising formulas. I dunno, doesn’t seem like math that way.
• Pivot table on 146MB Excel file. Why not?
• working on some excel charts, would love to know if they can ever be fun? hints, tips, ideas welcome…#excel
• Just received Excel spreadsheet from sis for mom’s retirement party this weekend. Six, count ’em, SIX, different worksheet tabs.
• Just remembered how annoying Excel is for analysis work. Calculating cells … 5% ARGH!
• Just recieved the infamous excel spreadsheet laying out all events going on for #Stampede…hmm should’ve taken the week off!! #yyc
• Notice how people with macs inflight never do any work – they mess around with photos, watch movies but never open a spreadsheet or a doc.
• Google docs are new and improved – charts are so much better than excel!
• I’m old school – excel spreadsheet for me. #TechnologicalDinosaur.
• The spreadsheet I’ve created is 176 columns and 48 rows. I’ve created a monster. I’m going to have excel nightmares tonight. #fb
• Thanks to everyones inability to use excel, I’m still "hard at work" fixing a spreadsheet that took me 5 minutes to repair.
• took 5mins to open an excel file…and i forgot i need to work on that file..i closed it! and i close it again.. =.= 2times! how smart!
• I can’t believe this mac didn’t save my spreadsheet even though I saved it at least 7 times on monday. I just don’t get macs!
• Couldn’t figure out why Excel was acting stupid… turns out February 30th is not a real date. You out smarted me this time Excel….
• I HATE EXCEL SPREADSHEETS. WHY DOES MY BOSS INSIST THAT EVERYTHING HAS TO BE IN AN EXCEL SPREADSHEET EVEN IF IT ADDS NOTHING?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
• Work computer just took 5 minutes to open Excel. This will be a loooong day.

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Tips and Tutorials

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Yesterday, it was back to work after the holiday weekend, and there was a bit of whining and moaning in the Excel tweets. And I was on mega-fire too, but it was due to the soaring temperatures, not my Excel report-making skills.

• Today I learnt how to combine 2 charts together in excel http://bit.ly/cpigbm
• sigh. the worst commute days are when I forget my laptop. 4 hours of staring at some bald guy reading a excel spreadsheet: engage!
• I’d like to know why my boss is constitutionally incapable of formatting an Excel file correctly. He’s on a Mac, I’m on a Mac.
• Why would you send out a spreadsheet all colourful like a rainbow when we aren’t allowed to print it out in colour? DUMBASS!
• I have a new 5-year plan! I love it! Its exciting! Its colour-coded on Excel, coz being a control freak is cool
• We’ve just had a ‘Yes Minister’ moment: "can I please have a spreadsheet showing all the spreadsheets we have." Shakes head and sighs.
• I can’t remember how to do a pivot table on a pc. Guess that’s a sign I need to get a new mac for home.
• Awesome day. Just closed an Excel file after an hour of work without saving it. THINK BEFORE YOU PRESS "NO"!
• Wait, is a pivot table just Excel-speak for "group by" ?
• Yes, I think I just worked 14 hours on a holiday! It’s okay, though, I was on excel-spreadsheet-report-making-mega-fire!
• i hate microsoft. Trying to create a chart from data in excel is like trying to get George Lucas to stop ruining his movies.
• can’t i have another holiday day? i don’t wanna get up early and spend the morning with a spreadsheet.
• Ali is wearing an excel chart showing her affection levels for each of the guys. #bachelorette
• I’m so into statistics. I used to keep an excel spreadsheet of all my clothes, including belts and socks and accessories with a ton of info
• I use my Outlook calendar combined with an Excel spreadsheet. Not cute, but serviceable
• Work & Expression: A LONG ROW TO HOE (tarefa difícil e demorada) Ex: Working with Excel sheets are always LONG ROW TO HOE #ingles
• excel i love you, but you’re bringing me down…

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Tips and Tutorials

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"There’s no crying in spreadsheets!" Well, I think that’s what Tom Hanks said in "A League of Their Own." Anyway, a frozen computer would be very refreshing on a hot day like this.

• Microsoft XL: "I’ve assumed you’d like to print your simple 2 column spreadsheet sprayed randomly over 8 empty pages of A4. Is that OK?"
• Read my latest post about the product of a messy night between Andy Warhol and Microsoft Excel http://bit.ly/bEfwxW
• ah just finished the spreadsheet with 15 minutes to spare! (:
• Hmm it seems that accidentally pasting a 5mb spreadsheet table into an email is a good way to freeze a computer… #gah
• Back to my desk. Earphone installed. Winamp played. Spreadsheet opened. On your mark, get set, Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
• I never thought I would see the day when it would be more efficient and useful to edit a 5000 line spreadsheet online than in a local app.
• Managing to procrastinate by using Format Cells in Excel to tidy up my messy spreadsheet. What is wrong with my brain today?
• The new MBA spends more time prototyping (photoshop, omnigraffle, etc) than modeling (excel). canvas > spreadsheet
• Every chapter in my spreadsheet textbk so far has given instructions on how to open Excel. You’ve got problems if you can’t do that by Ch 5.
• First time I do some hard core excel spreadsheets work in a long time…my fingers are rusty!
• thank goodness for the internets… my work is making excel cry, so I can kill time here while it’s calculating cells 😛
• Mother in law just got her own computer. Wants to buy Excel to keep a log of her digital photos. 😉
• It is not supposed to, but hacking into my old excel pivot table reports actually feels refreshing and productive.
• I think when I told my boss I don’t know how to use Excel, she thought i meant "I’m totally pro and can do whatever it is you want me to"

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Tips and Tutorials

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Not too many Excel tweets on the weekend, probably because of the July 4th holiday. A few people were stuck behind a spreadsheet though, and I hope they got outside eventually.

• YES, I’M AT HOME ON A SATURDAY NIGHT MAKING A SPREADSHEET. WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO ABOUT IT.
• You have work in the morning and Excel spreadsheets and word documents is no way to live in the 20 days of UK summer
• Given that a CA’s work is 90% centred on MS-Excel, the introduction of Indian-style coma’s for numbers in the 2010 version is epic stuff.
• I’m sure there’s someone who’d love to do this spreadsheet for me…
• Making a spreadsheet to track cals/carbs/etc. because intense exercise + winging the diet hasn’t been working as well as I’d hoped.
• Anxious… mainly because I don’t know how to use excel. :s
• Its still better than my boss. I fire up Calculator, he fires up Excel and types ‘=2+2’ 😛
• math problem: Rachel+ 9 hrs of work + unmotivated +Facebook(Twitter) = stacks of invoices & an excel spreadsheet done at home tonight. Oops
• I wish excel would let me ctrl + click a cell to de-select it.
• In this internship, the hours go by SO SLOWLY becuz I do nothing except working on excel spreadsheet. FML
• it’s not official until it’s in Excel format

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Related Links:

• Excel Tips and Tutorials
• Excel Weight Loss Tracker

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Hope you’re enjoying the holiday weekend — the perfect time to play Excel Battleship or Spreadsheet Monopoly!
Continue reading “Excel Twitter 20100703”

If you use Excel to create your knitting patterns, you might wish that Excel used Perl instead of VBA. And I don’t know about you, but I figure that kid is up to no good! Who voluntarily extends their school day?

• The Excel spreadsheet I need to print for a meeting in 10 minutes time is 134 pages … Ah.
• I built my running spreadsheet to calculate how many beers I can have that night 😉 #runforbeernotlife
• today will hopefully be a day of challenges like computer stuff. or intricate excel solutions. I love those.
• *stunned* The kid just called and voluntarily extended his school day. On top of that, he signed himself up to take an Excel class. 🙂
• Just had a crazy idea: a type chart that displays how effective an attack will be against all 493 Pokemon. If you need me, I’ll be in Excel.
• I ONLY HAVE 24 HOURS TO SAVE THE WORLD!… actually i only have 24 hours to finish a spreadsheet and a powerpoint but same thing
• Quite possibly may deserve a medal for over the phone talking my Dad through logging into his email, opening a spreadsheet & printing it.
• I love excel, colored charts, and fun fonts almost as much as I love office supplies. I’m a total work nerd…lol
• oh, i finished my spreadsheet . It’s a thing of beauty (as long as the profit line is accurate)…Best just double check it…again…
• Have spent the last couple of hours doing inventory on my yarn stash. Am now going to put all the details into a spreadsheet.
• wooo #brewers on the radio and i just dominated an excel problem…today is looking up. #nerd & #baseball
• There has to be a way for me to skip all the excel + chart work here at the office. I.hate.numbers.
• oh dear god…my colleague has no idea how to use Excel told him to split the sheet..he’s like whaat? omg what did u do..now i have 2tables
• If only Excel used Perl as its scripting language…
• u know u’ve been working 4 too long when u find making an excel spreadsheet easier than writing on paper #WhateverHappened2MyLife #Work
• Never copy and paste a love song youtube video instead an excel sheet into an email for work…oops…
• Pressing <ctrl>+Z in Excel 2010 causes application freeze. Not a good spreadsheet day.
• See I love using Excel. I’m all about the data, and excel helps because I hate the math associated with it.

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel VBA
• Excel Tips and Tutorials

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Happy Canada Day! Not too many Excel related tweets yesterday, so I guess everyone is out celebrating.

• more work in excel 2010. ribbon is starting to grow on me. downgraded from eye cancel to conjunctivitis. the rest of program is very spiffy
• Really great way to add a quick comparison chart to a worksheet seen on techrepublic blog >>http://bit.ly/bQI9fb #Excel
• Love excel for those things. It’s how I make estimates for custom stationery.
• an afternoon of brand finance charts!! How does this happen, I only actually wanted to be the designer at the start!! Excel here I come! xx
• You can link Work Items in TFS to Excel! Great, now you have 2 problems. You can also use SharePoint for project management! 3 problems!
• #Apple is looking for an Antenna Engineer, problem solving skills and excel required http://bit.ly/bWpxv4 #Fail
• I wanted to do chart from excel injury stats & team told me to back off – they were doing the charts – ownership/engagement!
• Hey, any excel wizards out there wanna help me with a nasty problem?
• Russian spy ring: details of the allegations, as a spreadsheet http://bit.ly/bq0nS0
• Have you seen this town map laid out in Excel? http://cartastrophe.wordpress.com/2009/07/03/the-town-spreadsheet/
• The demand for my Excel work comes in spurts. This week is a big one.
• having an Excel spreadsheet breakdown today. New version v old version compatability issues. Fed up 🙁 I need my own personal IT guy
• Today Excel and Matlab didn’t want me to do any work. So I didn’t.

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Data Entry Tips
• Excel Tips and Tutorials

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Yikes! Where did June go? It must have disappeared while I was working on my spreadsheet face and box plots.

• Can’t sleep; working on a spreadsheet. Not to be lame, but it’s kind of a work of art.. Yeah, that was lame.
• Anyone know of a better method for adding a benchmark line in Excel, or is this the best? http://bit.ly/cNeJll
• So today I resign, tomorrow I attend an excel course at work. I’ll certainly be putting my improved excel skills to work.. somewhere else.
• I’ve got "All Along the Watchtower" in my ears and Microsoft Excel loaded. Pumped up to tackle this spreadsheet! 😀
• Someone needs to invent an dropdown list for the sheets in an excel worksheet.
• Excel, I love you but you’re bringing me down. #naturaldisasters
• But when I jumped up extra hyped after that goal I may have given myself away. Maybe they think I just really love Excel.
• As delightful as this spreadsheet is, I should probably be getting some sleep.
• excel spreadsheet, a decent stopwatch, google earth to work out distance and thats it for me.
• I’m going to cut my wrist with a pivot table and hope the blood congeals into the chart I’ve been trying to create for 2 hours. #ih8excel
• Just because you can do pivot tables, doesn’t mean you need to use them for everything you do in Excel and create an 8mb doc!
• Been practicing my pivot table skills so I can teach a friend all I know (shouldn’t take too long!). 😉
• Adam found "Awesome quick formatting of chart elements in Excel 2010" http://is.gd/d8lZ4 Almost as good as 2003’s tearaway palettes.
• puzzeling over how to get top 5 and bottom 5 in the same pivot table with rank or choose or something anything! #Excel
• Oh no! Just been told I have "spreadsheet face". The wind better not change, or I’m done for…
• I am printing my expenses spreadsheet. The printer thinks it has 61682 pages. I bloody hope not; I’ve only got a ream.
• I think Excel should be able to make box plots without resorting to crazy work arounds.
• Geekish I know, but I’m loving Pivot Slicers in Excel right now, and don’t even get me started on PowerPivot!

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Tips and Tutorials

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I’ve felt those white walls caving in some days too.

• man this excel sheet is cramping my slacker style. how does this thing even work? turning out worse than my paperclip vending machine hook.
• ohh big boss is making a scene here. poor colleagues….guess i better switch to my "screensaver" aka the excel sheet. naooooo!
• Staring at an Excel spreadsheet. In the office alone for 8 hours. No one to talk to. The white walls are caving in.
• is listening to the storm while working on some excel reports for work. Hope the electricity doesn’t go out! Hitting save repeatedly…
• Psyching myself up to return to "spreadsheet world" tomorrow, envious of the travel bloggers I met this weekend.
• If the documentation for your API is in an excel spreadsheet, I don’t want it.
• Why does my CPU utilization redline and my EXCEL.exe memory usage spike to over 1 GB when all I’ve done is select a column?
• Just moved our #worldcup spreadsheet to the recycle bin
• You know it’s been a long, stupid Excel day when Doritos sound like a reasonable dinner substitute at 10:37pm.
• I keep quoting Lord of the Rings in my head this morning. Not sure why…”Fly you Fool” is not relevant to my spreadsheet
• Excel spreadsheet full of MI Data, you mock me with your complexity & utter lack of elegance. I yearn for infographics overtaking excel
• You know Microsoft Office is complicated when you have to ask Google to figure out how to create an Excel chart in Excel 2007 #microsoft

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Tips and Tutorials

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Sure, your brain knows that a spreadsheet can’t solve everything, but sometimes you try anyway — especially if it’s cold, or your feet hurt.

• Working on my film gear budget. Have decided that I’m in love with the Excel "sumif" function: "NO" "MUST" "MAYBE" "NEXTLIFE"
• I halped daughter with her IT homework in Excel by adding a Command Button+some neat code.Felt guilty.Added my name in a comment
• Last hr of work I never really work. Just click diff excel files adnd shuffle papers lmao
• Here’s a tip: be very careful when using Find & Replace in excel. Bad things can happen. Like completely ruining a couple hours’ work.
• Shower, Liverpool top, spreadsheet, beer, #Eng match*. In that order. *Disclaimer: one of these activities may be postponed until 17:15
• Made budget on Excel; under "cabs," included separate tabs for "frantic AM cab to work" "when drunk" "it’s cold" "feet hurt" and "cuz".
• Sponsor an African CHILD spreadsheet. An print ad #ewb is running in Engineering Dimensions next week: http://twitpic.com/1zty7d
• ‘I’m an engine-idler vigilante’: My success rate with cops is only 5 per cent. I keep an Excel spreadsheet so I ha… http://bit.ly/9Naz4p
• All of my totals in excel are off by ONE CENT. WHAT THE HECK
• OH: Who has seen Excel used as a database? (hands up) As a presentation tool? (hands up) As a spreadsheet? (crickets) #pyconau
• Contemplating trying a new bourguignon recipe but it’s so complicated it comes with an Excel spreadsheet and a decoder ring :S
• Audi UK bulletin: "..new ordering process on Q5 models, an Excel spreadsheet. Faxed orders will still be processed due to a spreadsheet bug"
• Deep into excel spreadsheet budgeting work; feel like I am being assimilated by the borg.
• My first song, titled "We all work in Excel Spreadsheets" http://bit.ly/9SO3gM
• Never tell me the odds. Present them to me instead as a colorful Excel pie chart. #badactionherodialogue
• I gotta stop working so that I can fill out a new tracking excel chart to gauge my efficiency and justify my existence, at my job..gulp! O_O
• I feel like an old person with technology when it comes to using Excel. I can’t even do the most simple things on it.
• Easier to Google for "display or hide all zero values on a worksheet" than invoke Help in Excel. Changed times for tech docs
• Can tell life is getting too hectic when you start thinking a spreadsheet will solve things….
• Every once in a while Excel pivot tables do exactly what I want them do and I briefly take back every bad word about Microsoft.

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel SUMIF Function

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Nerds, bosses, engineers and gangstas — is there anyone who doesn’t use Excel?

• Microsoft Excel just quit and deleted 6 spreadsheets and two days of work. I should really know better by now.
• I find it interesting that 95% of my work is done in MS Excel even though I’m an "Application Developer".
• Oh young engineers who don’t know how to use the F4 function in excel…
• I eagerly await the resulting spreadsheet comparing Sudafed blood levels with Excel productivity.
• To prove my love of Excel-avatar is of sister, sisters friend & I doing the official *cough* ‘gangsta’ fingers for Windows Microsoft Excel!
• I’d upload a pie chart showing the % of my day wasted by Microsoft Office 2008, but Excel crashed again. #excelfail #worstupgradeever
• im so done trying to figure how to work this Microsoft Excel so go ahead and -15 points i just dont care anymore!!!!
• Just taught my intern how to make a pivot table in excel. I feel v technologically savvy now. And old. She is 18!!
• For the record its "Excel" not "XL"! You make a spreadsheet in Excel & buy a size XL shirt. Not the other way!
• 4 pages? An Excel spreadsheet? Is this a royal wedding or something?
• New nerd goal: Get really good with Excel.
• havin excel documents 2 "work" on is so nice….dey pop up on the screen quickly so i can always pretend im busy
• you made a spreadsheet? does it have something to do with iphones?!
• Boss: "There you go! There’s nothing more inspiring than an #Excel spreadsheet."
• I may have been an English major, but I can do math. Don’t think I can’t find where you hid $13,000 in an Excel spreadsheet.

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Keyboard Shortcuts 

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Do not fall for the old "helpful stripper" joke in Excel. Besides, who could be hotter than our faithful old friend, Clippy?

• Going on vacation without an Excel spreadsheet schedule. How long before I lose my mind?
• Why can’t excel just be as easy as publisher? Give me media projects all day &  I’m golden. One spreadsheet & I feel dumb.
• doing some more excel work…this time i’m getting paid! =)
• Did anyone else notice that pressing ALT+F4+N in Excel brings out a helpful stripper instead of that stupid paperclip? [ed. Remember, I warned you not to fall for this!]
• Excel sheets,football & a Corona.Just another #WorldCup day in the office.Cheers! http://twitpic.com/1z9y0g
• performance review time. excel pivot tables are getting a workout.
• How can Microsoft Word not recognise "spreadsheet" as a word? That has to be some kind of joke between the Word and Excel teams at MS.
• I’m hip deep in excel docs for work and the main-TV-outage is making home kind of a weird social experiment. Both, weirdly, are net wins
• Found a fatal flaw in excel’s autorecover feature. Needless to say I already miss that spreadsheet full of notes from my 2.5hr meeting
• excel spreadsheet you CAN NOT write the future! Stop it!
• super fed up@ work,asked2get "this number" in an excel sheet, despite being only 200aed out,apparenlty it was the "wrong" formula
• I’m also budgeting. As in a multi-sheet Excel spreadsheet. Guys, I don’t want to be an adult. ;.;
• Creating infographics for my brownbag presentation. Good looking graphics is an art form. Excel charts are ugly. ^p

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Tips and Tutorials

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