It’s 7-11 Day, so be sure to get your free Slurpee. It’ll keep you cool while you try to figure out where your boss and Excel differ. Boss will be here today. How do I make Twitter look like a spreadsheet?! Dear Client, when i tell you to fill out the spreadsheet for import, i…
Perry Mason would hire a detective to do his data mining for him. And Della Street would know how to open Excel, and make the formulas work. OK, so watching a DVD didn’t happen. Filling in an Excel Spreadsheet at 4am happened. #ISwearIGetNerdierEveryday I vow to never be defeated in life by anything. Especially this…
If Excel starts to dance, you’ve either stayed at work too long, or nodded off in front of your computer again. No one thinks that you’re working. printed off a 7 page excel spreadsheet i’ve compiled and now i feel like the greatest scholar the world has ever seen Today I await the arrival of…
Excel has poetry, romance languages and Magic Mike, but are these things sexier than a pivot table? Started reorganizing excel spreadsheets for work and I. Cannot. Stop. #insane Creating a spreadsheet to organize and manage something important. Nothing else out there to solve this problem. This is how apps start. "This is fun", I whisper…
If you’re tired of copying and pasting in Excel all day, maybe you could hire some clown to do that for you. Or a spider. Ah … ‘Microsoft Excel has encountered a problem’ 🙂 Don’t say it’s Higgs causing that Well i just made myself look like a massive fool by missing off a minus…
Happy Fourth of July! Did you make all your Excel sheets in red, white and blue today? Or did you step away from Excel for a while, to clear your head? Excel is always asking me if I "trust" the contents of a spreadsheet. Are they usually not trustworthy or something Oh dear, another day…
Which type of Excel chart makes you laugh longer – a pie chart or a bubble chart? Or do both types, with default blue fill color, make you feel nauseous? Got an excuse to create a pie chart in Excel. Woohoo. You know you need to take a break when you dream about Excel macro…
Too bad you don’t get a gift card for every day that you work in Excel. That nerd crown must be worth a few dollars though. Just received an Excel spreadsheet with all the cells filled with a variance on this: 310.603 + 83.947 + 125.920 Today is being awesome. I hate it when people…
If you find an Excel macro that saves you a billion years of work, be sure to write it down, or pin it to your Excel Tips board in Pinterest. Otherwise, you’ll never find it later, when you need it. Is my love for excel spreadsheets something that shouldn’t be announced via twitter? #idontcare #nowyouknow…
Have you ever made an Excel chart in the shape of a giraffe? If not, maybe you need more coffee, or a little more Excel magic. Do any of Jon Peltier’s chart utilities create animal shapes, or just waterfalls? An Excel spreadsheet is the romance language of nerds. my new boss doesn’t know what cells…
Working with Excel all day can give you a migraine, or provide you with comedy material to entertain your friends and family. Or both. Somewhere, the universe is being held together with nothing more than an Excel spreadsheet running on Windows XP. #HonestyHour I love formatting the excel sheet rather than doing actual work! 😀…
Lucky interns! They get to work with Excel, which hadn’t even been invented back in my summer job days. And they don’t have to correct all their mistakes with white-out, like I did. When IT can’t help you with a pivot table you are officially a nerd or a operations mangement excel freak. #everyonelovesanerd #godhelpme…
If you have an Excel problem, do you guess the answer, or do you just Google everything? Maybe your boyfriend/roommate/groom knows the answer too. I’m just now opening Excel which means I haven’t done any work today Every time I use the UPPER function in excel I type the word supper. Not sure what that…
If you need Disneyland money, remember that people probably won’t pay extra for gradient backgrounds. Creating VBA code that works might get you some cash though. Just about won an epic battle against #Excel and its crazy formatting that’s twice in a week! Good things happen when I start creating dashboards and pivot tables in…
Doesn’t everyone post Excel ideas on Pinterest? What else could you possibly post on that site? Ok…I’m pretty sure I’m the only person that tweets about Excel… #nerdswag #excel I never thought I would have a desk job because I’m a drifter. Yet here I am, working on an excel spreadsheet, for the VP, at…
Today’s Excel questions — Can you find all the buttons in Excel 2007, without Googling? Did you know that Professional Excel Development is a mystery novel? Microsoft’s announcement is a version of Excel that lets you plot simple correlation graphs without wanting to lob your PC out the window. So, it’s 3.00am after my first…
Participating in a VLOOKUP competition might be a sign that you need a vacation. Or maybe some OLE action would brighten your day. He recalled of the time his boss told him, “If you can’t use Excel without a mouse, keep your résumé updated.” Excel: "Microsoft is waiting for another application to complete an OLE…
If you’re trying to look intelligent, avoid using rainbow graphs, cartoons, and 3-D pie charts in that fake Excel file that’s always open. A pivot table makes a good impression though. If we could ban faux-3d pie charts from Excel the world would be a better place. #MarkingStudentsAssignments I will pay someone to come up…
If you have to do something 40 times in Excel, maybe recording a macro would help! As long as it doesn’t interfere with the US Open feed, of course. People that use #EXCEL sheets as databases should be working in non-computer related jobs. And shouldn’t be allowed to reproduce. Thank god for #YouTube #excel #selfhelp…
Finally back after a long delay, here are my favourite Excel tweets from yesterday. If you’d like to track down the author of any tweet that’s posted here, copy part of the tweet into the Search box in Twitter, and you should find the original tweet and author. I was trying to create a Gantt…
If you can work Excel like a magician, you won’t need a team of assistants, or a stapler, to build your spreadsheets. I love excel spreadsheets and have began using them unnecessarily just for fun ► I just learned how to do a pivot table in excel. I feel like I just discovered the wheel….
Some people are using Excel to keep track of their online dating, and beauty products. I’d rather have old people problems, like poorly formatted forms. My boss just perked up when I said “pivot table”. #NERDALERT ► If pivot tables were a source of sustainable nutrition I wouldn’t need to eat for a week. Holy…
Do you dream about doing Excel stuff all day? Or is that a nightmare? Maybe the answer depends on the pay level. I don’t understand people who use these fancy $ budgeting websites. It’s called an Excel spreadsheet, people. Simple as that. ► there’s only so long I can stare at an Excel spreadsheet before…
Wine with dinner is an excellent reward, so treat yourself if you’ve spent the day debugging Excel macros. Taught myself how to do a pivot table in excel without the help of a BA. My reward? Wine while cooking dinner. #corporateamerica ► Just saw a hologram of Tupac working on an Excel pivot table in…
Don’t knock over pencil cups, just because someone wants you to colour code an Excel file. That type of thing should only happen in the Kid Zone. Going to bed with stupid excel formulas still on my mind. You may have won today Excel but tomorrow…I OWN you! #sleepwithoneeyeopen ► It’s Friday night in Las…
Today’s tweets were hard to believe. Are you sure that nobody cares about making Excel charts? Is it possible that the boss was right about something? Now my boss wants to know why weekly cost projections have switched from Excel to a spray painted message on his desk threatening his dog. ► Discovered the keyboard…
It’s fine to yell "Bullseye" occasionally, while working in Excel. Just don’t go to the dark side. Haha, I have a good sense of humor and enjoy a good joke, except in the instances listed in the attached Excel spreadsheet. Please forward. ► i was going to make you guys a chart, but i don’t…
If Excel could talk, would it really sound like Marvin from The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy? Would it be perfect husband material? I typed a date into an excel spreadsheet on Thursday and it changed into a random number. I immediately called the bomb squad. ► Am juggling twin tasks of making a pot…
Be nice to Excel, or it could delete all your work. Even your former boss, who makes way too much money, knows that. My first Excel spreadsheet, it’s going well. ► My info tech lecturer just said #Excel is stupid…THANK YOU!!! iThought it was just me that thought so ► The Mrs wanted a simple…
It’s spring! Celebrate by making your Excel worksheet look like a rainbow, or an Easter egg explosion. Handling someone else’s excel sheet is same as working on someone else’s code. Only no/lesser comments! ► There is no greater pleasure than plotting an upcoming holiday in Europe on an Excel spreadsheet. ► my excel spreadsheet looks…
Ignore the grocery checkout guy – it’s perfectly normal to create your shopping list in Excel. Just solved a co-worker’s excel problem. WITH SCIENCE. ► Hell is an endless Excel spreadsheet of math and a room of noisy coworkers. ► I’ll spend the rest of the day in Excel. You can find me via vlookup()….
If you won the Mega Millions lottery, you can buy a shoe tracker app. Otherwise, you can just build one in Excel. You better believe if I could put that excel workbook on the fridge I would. But the file is massiveeeeee #nerdtweet ► You know you’ve failed in life when you can’t even get…
Have you made an Excel chart since middle school? If not, maybe an exciting Excel boot camp would help you. My Matlab license expired, so I had to make a graph using Excel like some kind of goddamned animal! ► thank god my code to crash #excel at random is working properly now. I hate…
Which could you create faster – Van Gogh’s Starry Night, or a pie chart? Would you need dual monitors to work on your masterpiece? I should also sell tickets to watch me wrestle with pivot tables in Excel. Along with heaping mounds of complicated, intertwined data. ► Making a spreadsheet to compare closing cost estimates…
Excel wizardry and Pivot Table terror – it can affect you, even if you’re old, and working in Canada. Why is one of Canada’s largest companies using excel 2003. My graphs suck ► Successfully made my first line graph on Excel. Only took an hour + to figure out. #fml #computergenius ► Today an employee…
If your dad wants you to become an accountant, just pretend that you don’t know enough Excel. Maybe you could slice bread for a living instead. After working in excel for 3 hours, "Do you want to save the changes you made?"… You probably know what I clicked. #FML ► When you work with an…