Category: Excel Humor

It’s 7-11 Day, so be sure to get your free Slurpee. It’ll keep you cool while you try to figure out where your boss and Excel differ.

• Boss will be here today. How do I make Twitter look like a spreadsheet?!
• Dear Client, when i tell you to fill out the spreadsheet for import, i don’t mean rearrange and change all the column names… grrrr
• Just lost six hours of work in excel because "autorecover" has done the opposite
• Man I do love working with numbers! (At work. On Excel. Splitting bills among GFFs is different as the brain hibernates off-office hours)
• I love it when I can help people at work with stuff in micorsoft excel that I didn’t even really know. Makes me feel like a brainiac
• Stuff I am doing in Excel has gone beyond spreadsheets and into numerology. I should have the black book of #Agrippa on my desk at work
• When you’re at row 973 in excel, you know work has been done.
• Wow. You can’t nudge chart elements in Excel 2007? Microsoft: 1, Real people: 0. Seriously. What were they thinking?
• A locked petty cash box and an Excel spreadsheet. Is it me or is this a slightly over the top method of managing a tea fund?
• It’s too hot to actually clean so instead I’m making an excel spreadsheet of my make up collection.
• Today I asked for some data in an Excel spreadsheet. I was offered 1/4 of the data via fax. #cantalwaysgetwhatyouwant
• I posted a query on a forum about helping convert an excel formula into VBA code. Over 50 people read it, not one reply. Bastards.
• Oh god. Why would you ever hard code a column count in excel? #thesemetricsareallmessedup #fixingotherpeoplesderps
• My boss: "When I do the math in my head, it doesn’t agree with your excel spreadsheet. Can you go over my notes and find where they differ?"
• Today I learnt more about Excel conditional formatting than I ever wanted. On the plus side my graphs now look pretty!
• almost every single chart I’ve made in Excel in the last few years has involved massive tweaking. Somehow, I don’t think *I’m* defective

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Perry Mason would hire a detective to do his data mining for him. And Della Street would know how to open Excel, and make the formulas work.

• OK, so watching a DVD didn’t happen. Filling in an Excel Spreadsheet at 4am happened. #ISwearIGetNerdierEveryday
• I vow to never be defeated in life by anything. Especially this excel spreadsheet I’ve been staring at for two hours! It will not beat me!
• Does anyone know the Excel formula for "do all this work me?" #spreadsheet #hell
• how many people does it take to do math in an excel spreadsheet? Three.. Two watching.. One doing the work.
• why can’t I get this formula to work in Excel.. I’m not asking for much
• How can people be so stupid as to not know how to save a file from excel?
• In other news, I’m making an excel chart to show how much money I’m saving buying my txtbooks used on amazon… #businessnerd #ilikecharts
• On the other hand, my excel lookup and pivot table skills are coming back. I know, the fact that I’m excited about this is pretty sad. #geek
• I have to read through and disect a detailed 14 tab procedural excel workbook on tonight…nothing like good ole procrastination….lol
• Reasons to work from home while I can: I can watch Perry Mason on the Hallmark Channel while data mining in Excel. #MondayFunday
• Hangovers finally gone 4 hours left of work..over 2 thousands excel cells left. I need to win the power ball already
• Oh god I just went mental and offered to put some information in an excel chart. I don’t even know how to open excel oh godohgodohgod.
• There is almost always a simple explanation for an Excel formula failing. It’s usually a stupid typo that you overlook 10 times.

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If Excel starts to dance, you’ve either stayed at work too long, or nodded off in front of your computer again. No one thinks that you’re working.

• printed off a 7 page excel spreadsheet i’ve compiled and now i feel like the greatest scholar the world has ever seen
• Today I await the arrival of a spreadsheet like the results from a colonoscopy.
• Now I just need to persuade agencies I can actually use MS Office. *whips up fancy excel graphs to put in fancy ppt slideshow* *dies inside*
• My boss is unable to see the world if it’s not formatted in MS Excel. Like, she probably sees her pet cat as a bunch of formulas.
• is it wrong to love the internet for facilitating my further love of Excel?
• I love waking up from dreaming of data entries and excel sheets all night. #someonesavemefromthisnightmare
• Yes, Excel, please delete my 18 page spreadsheet. I really wanted to redo it. Really.
• Social convention dictates when one has two earbuds in and eyes squinting at an excel spreadsheet, one does not wish to be interrupted. #fyi
• Joy of being an accountant? I can throw an excel spreadsheet up on my screen & nod off. Everyone thinks I’m working.
• New discovery! When you stay at work for nearly 10 hours, Excel starts to do a little dance. It might be singing too
• My boss still uses Lotus 1-2-3. While he is away I am going to convert everything to Excel and delete the Lotus files.
• Spent 30 min tryin to remember a stupid excel formula I shouldn’t have forgotten in the first place
• Both Cherry and I have a cold. Boo. Spending the day in bed with the little one and an Excel spreadsheet. I know how to live.
• The most exciting part of my day was adding a VLOOKUP to an Excel spreadsheet. Also, fighting a cholo grizzly was cool.
• Someone will send you an excel spreadsheet that is color-coded. Find a dark, damp corner and just weep. More for Colorblind Gemini…
• Wondering if I can cobble together some code/macro to get #excel to open a database,extract data and then tweet #alittleknowledgeisdangerous

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Excel has poetry, romance languages and Magic Mike, but are these things sexier than a pivot table?

• Started reorganizing excel spreadsheets for work and I. Cannot. Stop. #insane
• Creating a spreadsheet to organize and manage something important. Nothing else out there to solve this problem. This is how apps start.
• "This is fun", I whisper to my nerdy self as I make an Excel spreadsheet to calculate my grades.
• Trying to figure out how to enter the cost of a movie ticket to #MagicMike in my Excel spending spreadsheet as ‘priceless’
• Birthday planning begins! Like a good PR gal, I’m kicking off the planning with an excel spreadsheet of guests.
• step away from the spreadsheet and go sign someone that I’ve heard of, the Astros didnt need Excel to trade Carlos Lee.
• I just showed Karol my Excel spreadsheet of my hour-by-hour schedule for the RWA Conference. For some reason she thinks I’m anal. 🙂
• talk some more sexy…please. Say ‘pivot table’
• I am pretty proud that a spreadsheet I designed took 15 minutes maxing both processors on my computer to calculate. #excel #PivotTables
• today was about as exciting as reading a book on programming code for excel in spanish gets.
• Attidutes that lead to #spreadsheet errors – "It works, therefore it is correct" #spreadsheetrisk #excel #msexcel
• Need to be an excel expert within 10minutes. I need to find the problem with these massive pools of data.
• Awesome morning with Yr 8, Excel charting, illustrated by the charts and data sets from the LHC. No Higgs, but we have lovely pictograms!!!
• Excel and pie charts / can they show where we went wrong? / rainbow on her cheek #senryu #haiku #micropoetry
• Word to any wannabe game designers out there – learn Excel! Maths and graphs are your friends when balancing
• Some days excel is your best friend. Other days, it is a ninja-Chuck Norris hybrid waiting to roundhouse punch you in the face. #fml

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If you’re tired of copying and pasting in Excel all day, maybe you could hire some clown to do that for you. Or a spider.

• Ah … ‘Microsoft Excel has encountered a problem’ 🙂 Don’t say it’s Higgs causing that
• Well i just made myself look like a massive fool by missing off a minus symbol on a spreadsheet making us look out £45k and panicking #idiot
• Who knew Excel pivot tables could be this sexy?!
• The clown is making a balloon dog give birth. I AM TRYING TO WORK ON AN IMPORTANT SPREADSHEET #ClownInOffice
• When I get to hell, the devil will make me fix someone else’s spreadsheet formulas and faulty logic all day. With extra data entry errors.
• I FINALLY figured out Excel 2010! Well, at least the doughnut graphs. WHY did everything have to change so much in 2010? #WHY
• The guy next to me in the lab made the most ridiculous spreadsheet in Excel. That will be me one day if I play my cards right.
• Don’t tell anyone, but I just wrote 4500 lines of code using Excel’s CONCATENATE function #notbestpractice
• I realize it *is* possible, but why would someone construct an org chart in Excel? With photographs? #new_hammer #all_nails
• Dear Excel: merged cells are the topic of today’s defenestration exercise. Kthxbai
• Monthly report time, that’s code for my head is going to be buried in Excel for at least the next 45mins
• Note to self: buy Excel for Dummies after work. -__-
• This woman at work, sits and creates Excel spreadsheets all day, coding them etc, for no reason. It’s nothing to do with her job. #baffled.
• Guy at work just asked how to copy & paste in excel. He didn’t know how b/c he used to have people to do that. Seriously? Hate him already.
• Bored with filling in an excel spreadsheet I went in the garden & watched a spider build a web. Similar work. A grid to catch stuff.
• These graphs are uglier than the excel chart template.

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Happy Fourth of July! Did you make all your Excel sheets in red, white and blue today? Or did you step away from Excel for a while, to clear your head?

• Excel is always asking me if I "trust" the contents of a spreadsheet. Are they usually not trustworthy or something
• Oh dear, another day at work. It wouldn’t be so Bad if they let me play games on the computers but noooooo those are for excel!
• Just discovered there’s a team of three who provide support to Department staff on optimal colours for spreadsheet cells. #auspol
• OMG I am actually writing Excel VBA code. Sob… it was not meant to be like this! Please send help!
• Can’t work out how to work out something in Excel. Can’t help but feel the universe is playing a joke on me. #whatismaths
• you can find anything you need on google – even code to clean up an unruly excel doc. VBA, you are now my friend!
• I just said in all sincerity "A chart can be compelling", I think I need to step away from the Excel file for awhile.
• I just Googled "how to work Microsoft Excel." Since when did I fall behind technology? Excuse me as I need more paper for my typewriter….
• Old people in the work force should be required to take excel training. Like renewing their license make sure they are up with times
• Haven’t proposed to anyone in a while, I want to marry this pivot table I’m working on….
• My boss thinks I’m an Excel master now. Uh-oh. What have I done?!
• I spent my day putting data from sales invoices onto an excel spreadsheet. Yeah, it IS as exciting as it sounds. o_0
• Dear Microsoft: Do you have a *reason* why Undo applies to every open Excel spreadsheet, not just the one I’m currently looking at? #FAIL
• Hubs: "I have a really interesting Excel problem". Me: Blank stare. #dork
• Color coded my excel spreadsheet in red, white, and blue. #Merica’

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Which type of Excel chart makes you laugh longer – a pie chart or a bubble chart? Or do both types, with default blue fill color, make you feel nauseous?

• Got an excuse to create a pie chart in Excel. Woohoo.
• You know you need to take a break when you dream about Excel macro code and formulas
• Somebody please call the Geek police, this Excel spreadsheet is giving me goosebumps.
• i just entered all the data for a bubble chart in Excel, hit "okay" and then laughed for ten minutes at the thing it gave me. wtf O____O
• Even now, my fingers itch with the yearning to open up Excel and create vast swaths of color-coded schedule charts. But no! I must not.
• I am officially mature! Doing my yearly budget with an excel spreadsheet, ha! 🙂 xx
• Today’s wtf: a customer managed to cram 3100 pics (all equal & on top of each other) in every sheet of a 50 sheet Excel workbook…
• I should be teaching a course on MS Excel at this point.
• Just did an excel spreadsheet f my finances. I am not sure whether to be proud I can work excel, or nauseous at my bills. #broke
• Boss: “I’ve been in that Excel report all day.”Me: “Well if you go mad or die we’ll have a meticulously-created graph to show the process.”
• Has anyone in the history of the world ever wanted the fill color in the legend on their #Excel chart to be the default color of BLUE?!?!?
• #Pivot has turned into the buzzword of 2012. I think I liked it better when it was just an Excel feature.
• nothing like a hardcore excel spreadsheet problem to spice up the evening 😉
• i need an excel spreadsheet to keep up with these game of thrones characters
• I thought Twitter live infographics on TV were dumb but I just witnessed an illegible scrolling Excel spreadsheet. #nbadraft

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Too bad you don’t get a gift card for every day that you work in Excel. That nerd crown must be worth a few dollars though.

• Just received an Excel spreadsheet with all the cells filled with a variance on this: 310.603 + 83.947 + 125.920 Today is being awesome.
• I hate it when people come in with questions and I can’t help them! Goddamn Excel Pivot Tables on MACS! It’s like 3 nightmares in one!
• The home Excel won’t nest as much as the work Excel. Disappointed but not surprised. Must be cleverer.
• I literally just made an Excel spreadsheet so I can record my exercises and weight each day. I’m turning into my mother. #yikes
• i literally want to send this guy’s excel document to a museum. it’s like a beautiful work of art. all the gorgeous formulas.
• Microsoft Excel apparently only allows 1,048,570 rows. Just when I needed 1,048,571. #fml
• Do you know how to make a chart in excel? What I wanted to say:"Click the chart button…dumbass" What I said: "Click the chart button"
• I got an award at work today thanks to that excel calculator I made 🙂 The award even included a $25 gift card! Huzzah
• Today at work I taught the IT guy how to use COUNTIFS and a pivot table in excel, guess who wears the nerd crown now!
• These days..half of my time goes into Explaining the formula’s in excel to my Boss.
• I wish there was a Grand Slam of Excel so I could go somewhere exotic and watch my wife do a pivot table quicker than the French No. 1.
• Oh you know; just waiting for an Excel formula to work on 155,073 items.
• I’ve just used a pivot table for the very first time (using the patented ‘poke at the menu’ approach). I feel so accomplished.
• Lol at the 55 year old lady at work who taught me a shortcut on excel and called it "sexy"
• What’s the reward for a hard days work of excel sheets? Yup you know it more excel sheets! #HellYeah

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If you find an Excel macro that saves you a billion years of work, be sure to write it down, or pin it to your Excel Tips board in Pinterest. Otherwise, you’ll never find it later, when you need it.

• Is my love for excel spreadsheets something that shouldn’t be announced via twitter? #idontcare #nowyouknow
• Not even 8am and excel has already locked up my computer #badsigns
• Jeez, Microsoft, it’s 2012… would it BANKRUPT you to give us a couple more string functions for Excel worksheets?
• The error-bar feature in Excel was clearly designed by someone who had never encountered any data ever in any capacity.
• I am wearing the new Google Glasses. My whole world now looks like a giant Excel spreadsheet
• I would do a spreadsheet tabulating my jealousy and excitement but sadly can’t as I am only basic level Excel trained…
• As I stare at an excel spreadsheet, I ask myself, “Was my life really supposed to turn out like this?”
• currently cleaning up a spreadsheet of customers from the last 10 years, just 200 to go… who can beat that for excitement this morning?
• This is just the start. The day will come when Microsoft Excel takes on a murderous life of it’s own.
• If you’re a “digital agency”, and your idea of an issue tracker is an Excel spreadsheet, you really need to review your internal process.
• My boss pissed me off with this excel spreadsheet, so I’m rainbow highlighting everything and sending it back #officewars
• That moment when you realize you’ve sorted an excel spreadsheet and missed a column…and saved it. No undo. Oh joy.
• If d sheep manages to jump over d fence, goes to X-axis, if it fails, it goes to Y-axis #insomnia =IF(“sheep jumps”=success,”X”,”Y”) #excel
• Got an even newer game. ‘Excel Spreadsheet or new Muse song title?’ You have to guess which the word or phrase is. First word: “Discrepancy”
• Just saved a billion years of copy pasting with a VBA macro in Excel for Mac. I didn’t think I could love Excel any more. I was wrong.

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Have you ever made an Excel chart in the shape of a giraffe? If not, maybe you need more coffee, or a little more Excel magic. Do any of Jon Peltier’s chart utilities create animal shapes, or just waterfalls?

• An Excel spreadsheet is the romance language of nerds.
• my new boss doesn’t know what cells in an excel spreadsheet are this is a nightmare
• Only just finished prep for meeting thanks to some stupid rogue formula in Excel! Now if I can just switch off, chill and sleep.
• I felt so pro using excel doing gantt chart beautifully(:
• Gonna do a quick Excel spreadsheet of the filters I’ve used on Instagram. Maybe make a few charts. brb.
• My goal at work today is to make a graph in Excel that’s in the shape of a giraffe. #loftyaspirations
• Number crunching and Excel nerd-ing my head off at work. More coffee now please.
• Ack…7:00 and just leaving work. Excel is a pain in my catookus.
• Spent over 2 hours trying to make a chart for my dad on Microsoft Excel, and I finally got it right 🙂 #feelingaccomplished
• Spent the better part of the last 3 days trying to get an Excel formula to work in my spreadsheet. #geektweet
• that stupid moment youre ferociously pounding #s in excel, hit the # lock & look up 5 mins later to find youre typing nothing in row 1048576
• Fighting the after lunch drowsyness, and looking at those excel spreadsheet ain’t helping. #Yawn
• I’m convinced that coders are modern day practitioners of sorcery (also my coworker who used Excel magic to save me 2 hours of work today).
• apparently pivot tables could revolutionise my excel life

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Working with Excel all day can give you a migraine, or provide you with comedy material to entertain your friends and family. Or both.

• Somewhere, the universe is being held together with nothing more than an Excel spreadsheet running on Windows XP.
• #HonestyHour I love formatting the excel sheet rather than doing actual work! 😀
• Excel gives me a headache. And yet first spreadsheet was "so pretty that it needs a friend"..not my words
• I’m editing an Excel spreadsheet that spans two monitors, one is widescreen, the other one not wide enough!
• I keep a Microsoft Excel spreadsheet of all the most useful acronyms. I’d email it, but it’s 280mb and I’m on dial up.
• If this is what the real world is like, colleges should only teach PowerPoint and Excel…
• Gonna release our next album as a limited edition Microsoft Excel pivot table
• Hey Spreadsheet, maybe you should ‘excel’ at saving yourself! – COOL JOKE I JUST TOLD MY WIFE
• Just when I think I understand and comprehend EXCEL sheets. It throws me a curve ball and I get an instant migraine. #FML
• My Excel-Spreadsheet-Nerd side is bursting out like the Hulk!…did someone tick me off or do I just love spreadsheets this much? #BigIdeas
• I love hiding cells on Excel. Makes me feel sneaky.
• I don’t normally work in Excel, but I have been in it all day! Prediction: I will dream of mathematical formulas and pivot tables tonight.
• Love my boss. Him: "These files aren’t on my computer, they’re in Excel." Me: […explains…] Him: "Whatever."
• Using a pen to fix up one of the graphs because excel got it wrong. –.- great

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Lucky interns! They get to work with Excel, which hadn’t even been invented back in my summer job days. And they don’t have to correct all their mistakes with white-out, like I did.

• When IT can’t help you with a pivot table you are officially a nerd or a operations mangement excel freak. #everyonelovesanerd #godhelpme
• Waiting for my flight to Michigan. I’m between a dude working on an excel spreadsheet and a girl arguing on the phone about money.
• Looking at an Excel spreadsheet and realising that over time, all your hardcore GCSE knowledge has leaked out of your ears.
• Tip to future interns in the work place… Learn Excel…you’ll be using it…alot. #interns #mondays
• Just typed up my last spreadsheet for work..is it sad that I got teary eyed typing it?. #sadlifeilead..
• 7 sheet excel spreadsheet and all the pages have different size font and zoom on them, I give up.
• Discovered turning in an Excel spreadsheet at work with every cell filled with the word “redrum” is quite effective keeping the boss away.
• Always funny working with folks looking at and working with figures in an Excel spreadsheet and they leave the room to find a calculator
• I was working on a slick tournament management app but after further inspection, an Excel spreadsheet works just as well. #EasyWayOut
• oh? so that’s the purpose of having two monitors? something abt making excel spreadsheet easier to look at.
• Just heard myself call a pivot table and a dual axis bar graph sexy. Oh man.
• Big work spreadsheets with all of the deadlines ever are only helpful if you regularly check the spreadsheet.
• The American work force runs on coffee and excel. What would we do if one day There was no excel or coffee? #nationwidepanic
• I just shouted out "I LOVE EXCEL!" and genuinely meant it.

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If you have an Excel problem, do you guess the answer, or do you just Google everything? Maybe your boyfriend/roommate/groom knows the answer too.

• I’m just now opening Excel which means I haven’t done any work today
• Every time I use the UPPER function in excel I type the word supper. Not sure what that says about me.
• need boyfriend who likes pugs and gets excel RITe NOW….. #plze #asaap
• I can’t believe I’m pulling an all-nighter right now to finish thesis work …. in the summer. Fighting with Excel in June is just sad 🙁
• How have I never used or heard of VLOOKUP before???This seems to be the most useful function in the history of Excel…
• Never learned how to use Excel. That’s embarrassing. Don’t tell boss, just Google everything. #diva
• I’ve been having an excel problem for a couple hours now. Stupid roommate/coworker says "i would Google it" oh would you? REVOLUTIONARY
• You have to love when a help guide gives you the syntax for an excel function, you follow the syntax, and it says "INCORRECT SYNTAX." #f
• Wow…apparently I am in a HIGH percentile of competent Excel users. Also…I need to learn more about pivot tables #guessedthoseanswers
• Why has it taken me several years and several hundred spreadsheets to figure out that #Excel has spellcheck???? #thelittlethingsinlife
• Entering data into Excel is like hazing for internships #InternProblems” I haven’t used a mouse in days
• Excel is just one big exercise in trial and error.
• I had to make an excel worksheet for the clothes I’m packing to help me keep track of days & such. Seriously what is happening to me?
• The groom’s cake is an excel spreadsheet. Where do I find a guy like this? #realworldprob

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If you need Disneyland money, remember that people probably won’t pay extra for gradient backgrounds. Creating VBA code that works might get you some cash though.

• Just about won an epic battle against #Excel and its crazy formatting that’s twice in a week!
• Good things happen when I start creating dashboards and pivot tables in #excel. Booyah.
• I’m barely capable of staying awake when I have to work in #Excel. I should start entering data at night when I can’t get to sleep.
• Copied formula right to the very bottom in excel. This is a near fatal error.
• Job for Ben: "Take this terribly unorganized excel spreadsheet and make it organized." No other guidance. What!? #InternWork
• Trying to decipher my boss’ Excel formulae(s) is like cracking the genetic code. Shoot me now.
• Just got $200 for finishing my moms excel sheet for work. Just add it to my Disneyland money
• Feeling smug; created a whole line of working Excel VB code. #notquiteadeveloperyetthough
• "Where did my pivot table wizard go?" … Things I have said today that make me hate myself. ;^) #TIHSTTMMHM
• Always get sad when ‘reporting’ actually means ‘run some unversioned code, dump the results into an Excel file and email it’.
• When confused, spreadsheet.
• After listening to Stephen Few’s presentation on Data Sensemaking…I must sadly retire my gradient backgrounds for my Excel graphs. Ugh.
• Wife sent me email at work: "What do you think of my form??" It was a spreadsheet. What a tease.
• Excel is quite smart, except when it is unbelievably, infuriatingly stupid.

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Doesn’t everyone post Excel ideas on Pinterest? What else could you possibly post on that site?

• Ok…I’m pretty sure I’m the only person that tweets about Excel… #nerdswag #excel
• I never thought I would have a desk job because I’m a drifter. Yet here I am, working on an excel spreadsheet, for the VP, at 9PM.
• Arguing w/ 7yr old about the sum of 63 + 27. He refuses 2admit he’s wrong & thankfully I can still add double digits sans excel spreadsheet
• I’m stepping away from that spreadsheet. Comparing yourself to other’s + data + Excel = Greatest.Time.Vortex.Eva.
• HOLY NERD MOMENT! i HAVE discovered that people post excel spreadsheet ideas on Pinterest!
• If you’re going to google "Excel chart" and have the window up so your boss thinks you’re busy, make sure the chart is in English first.
• What? Everyone doesn’t have an excel spreadsheet with their budget plotted out 6 months in advance? #money #budgets
• I’ve been at it 4 hrs but finally learnt something new when using an Excel spreadsheet. #excitingday
• I feel amazing today! Like Wonder Woman amazing. Glad I can teach someone with my knowledge on how to: Pivot table.
• It’s a shame my Excel skills are wasted because I chose to be a stupid doctor instead. Sorry mom.
• Dear Microsoft Excel: "A formula in this worksheet contains one or more invalid references." Great, thanks for letting me know. WHERE IS IT?
• Do you fully understand the data you’re presenting in your Excel workbook? If not, chances are neither does anybody else.
• Dear Excel, I hate your face. And your conditional formatting. And that you refuse to make pretty charts for me.
• Senior executives: Smart people (mostly), but incredibly inferior #excel skills. Format a chart for them, they call you a genius.

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Today’s Excel questions — Can you find all the buttons in Excel 2007, without Googling? Did you know that Professional Excel Development is a mystery novel?

• Microsoft’s announcement is a version of Excel that lets you plot simple correlation graphs without wanting to lob your PC out the window.
• So, it’s 3.00am after my first real day and I’m up working on an excel workbook on my own accord. #imustlikethisstuff #tothetuneofavettbros
• Listening to AC/DC while learning advanced excel code/macros feels like a hacker montage – #ProblemChild
• Pivot tables is one area of Excel that has always flummoxed me. One problem is that the name has never made sense to
• This is the most ratchet lab report ive ever done. A drawn graph; excel is the devil.
• Am re-reading sections of ‘Pro Excel Development, 2nd Ed.’ – Turns out the Data Import Wizard did it, on the pivot table, with the slicer.
• Helping my mom do a flow chart for work… I think barely knowing how to do Excel and yet being able to do this is pretty awesome.
• You’re right, Excel. I should just rebuild the pivot table instead of updating it. I have the technology. Better than it was before.
• I feel accomplished. I created a graph in excel 2007 without Googling where all the buttons and menus were moved to.
• Dear excel pivot tables, please stop malfunctioning. Sincerely, frustrated intern with a deadline #internshipproblems
• I just spent 8 hours on one Excel chart..my brain AND my butt are numb
• I’m up at 12:40am creating an Excel spreadsheet about money. WHAT HAVE I BECOME?!
• Now trying to do a stoopid waterfall chart in Excel. Way too complicated!
• No one knows how happy I am that I can’t type my boss’s name into Microsoft excel without it autocorrecting to "Stupid." #thelittlethings

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Participating in a VLOOKUP competition might be a sign that you need a vacation. Or maybe some OLE action would brighten your day.

• He recalled of the time his boss told him, “If you can’t use Excel without a mouse, keep your résumé updated.”
• Excel: "Microsoft is waiting for another application to complete an OLE action" I don’t want a fiesta!!! I just wanna work!!!
• There’s a POSSIBILITY that I’m deciding on a potential holiday cottage using my own comparisons Excel spreadsheet
• I can’t stand the standard grey chart area and excessive gridlines on excel template. And people just leave them in! Argh.
• Nothing like a Force Quit to cap off an afternoon. Because yes, Excel, clearly my work would be much, much better the second time around.
• Then the Customer told me that he needs 1 dashboard page with 16 Gauges, 2 Charts, 1 Pivot Table and you know what I asked the customer 🙂
• if you’re happy because you’re excel file is password protected DON’T I can crack it in 5 minutes. stupid MS security
• Perhaps having 150,000 rows in this spreadsheet was a bit of an overkill, it takes about ten minutes to do anything ;/
• NTS: never ever lie to your employers and tell them you love Microsoft Excel and making spreadsheets. Someone help me! #noob
• I love it when my job is reduced to showing impatient, overreactive people how to print off Excel worklists properly.
• I did so much Excel yesterday even Facebook looked like a spreadsheet to me.
• You know it’s a slow day at work when the auditors start competing to see how fast they can complete a vlookup in Excel.
• These ppl at work think I have advanced excel skills…I’ve googled everything they’ve asked me to ever do #thankugoogle"
• I haven’t used Excel graphs in a while. They’ve changed all the colours. I approve although they should’ve run it by me first, really.

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If you’re trying to look intelligent, avoid using rainbow graphs, cartoons, and 3-D pie charts in that fake Excel file that’s always open. A pivot table makes a good impression though.

• If we could ban faux-3d pie charts from Excel the world would be a better place. #MarkingStudentsAssignments
• I will pay someone to come up with a presentation on how to create charts/graphs on excel! I don’t have time for this!!! Grrrr
• If there was an ap/site that changed normal excel charts into cartoon animals, I would use that.
• making a killer playlist and a tall glass of boone’s farm to get me through hours of excel spreadsheets… #classy #dayinthelife
• I’ve become a master of having an excel spreadsheet open at all times to make me look busy and somewhat intelligent
• Who are these people who don’t know what a pivot table is?
• I asked my boss to help me with an MS Excel problem that Ive been trying to figure out for the past hour He solved it in 2 mins. #WHOAH
• losing weight the only way I know how, with GRAPHS. new Excel 2007 means I can have RAINBOW GRAPHS
• Have we really gotten to Generation Z? Will the generations keep going like an Excel spreadsheet or do we need a new workbook?
• Mass panic caused by hidden cells in an excel spreadsheet – Averted
• Thinking of putting on my resume "Ability to Excel spreadsheet my way out of any disaster"
• I just asked Excel to fill every blank cell with 7 Ys by accident. Well that’s one way to make work entertaining! #fail
• I am creating an Excel spreadsheet for my nail polish. I’ve hit an all-time low. #adminforlife #nailpolishaddict
• Asked Excel to subtract one five digit number from another five digit number. The answer it’s given me is "October 1985". Stupid formatting.
• Note to self: never tell your boss your and Excel expert. Merging 200 email lists is so unfun.
• Maaaaaybe if you’re 65 years old you shouldn’t talk to me about Excel as if I’ve never heard of it. #shaaddup

_______

If you have to do something 40 times in Excel, maybe recording a macro would help! As long as it doesn’t interfere with the US Open feed, of course.

• People that use #EXCEL sheets as databases should be working in non-computer related jobs. And shouldn’t be allowed to reproduce.
• Thank god for #YouTube #excel #selfhelp videos
• You know your a nerd when you wake up and realize you dreamed about #excel.
• conditional formatting is the last act of a desperate man #excel
• Coworker to me:"nothing is impossible in excel" #wordsofwisdom
• #ThatExcitingMoment when excel makes sense all of a sudden. Lol! Cc @Slor_thips
• My inability to use Microsoft Excel is startling. #repelled
• adding tabs to an Excel grid is a sure way for me to miss info. I never check for other tabs, much to my detriment
• One screen excel, the other email, and the third #usopen live stream… Gunna be a good day
• Oh Excel why do you hate me so? Can’t we just be friends?
• Oh hey cool I figured out how to do what I wanted to in this excel tool. Now do it 40 more times. – my life
• Playing Sonic on excel. I need to meet the genius who was able to make this possible
• Excel, you are amazing. I’m so sorry for ever doubting you.

___________

Finally back after a long delay, here are my favourite Excel tweets from yesterday. If you’d like to track down the author of any tweet that’s posted here, copy part of the tweet into the Search box in Twitter, and you should find the original tweet and author.

• I was trying to create a Gantt chart using excel. Step by step described in YouTube and that was the last place I looked. Doh!
• Making lots and lots of Excel charts now. I’m going to admit… This isn’t quite as fun as the other stuff I’ve been doing.
• I just made an awesome cluster-stacked graph w/ trend line and total in Excel. Sometimes, that’s just the sort of project that you need.
• The awful realisation that those hours spent arsing around in IT with paint shouldve been spent learning how to create excel graphs. #cvLies
• I spent most of my time swearing at Excel at it constantly altered the format of any information that I put into its stupid little boxes..
• I am pissed. Because of a stupid Excel 2010 memory leak, I have lost 4-5 hours worth of work. Excel stopped saving – 1.3 GB process
• Presenter just spent 5 min nudging his excel power pivot data linking boxes so they were lined up. people running for door.
• My work uses such antiquated crap I can not put Proficient in Microsoft Word/Excel on my resume!! #Lame #CorporateProbs
• 2 hours and 5 pages later… My excel shuts down at work and I never once pressed save! :,( #SchoolboyError #Devastated
• Colleague at work with 8+ yrs of exp. in sales doesn’t know how to calculate on an excel sheet. Not surprising at all
• Had Advanced Excel training at work today. You know what I learned? I’m a goddam geek. Class didn’t teach me a freakin thing. haha #ExcelPro
• Just helped a lady refresh a pivot table…I’ve accomplished somethin today so I can go home now right??
• Ever had someone add cells to an Excel worksheet that’s 7500 rows long and throw everything off by one or two rows? That’s my morning.
• I just received an entire Excel workbook in Comic Sans. I believe in freedom, but why is this even an option?

_______________

If you can work Excel like a magician, you won’t need a team of assistants, or a stapler, to build your spreadsheets.

• I love excel spreadsheets and have began using them unnecessarily just for fun ►
• I just learned how to do a pivot table in excel. I feel like I just discovered the wheel. This is game changing. ►
• One more look at an Excel spreadsheet and I may just drop out of school. #Overdramatic #DontCare #Frustrated ►
• I wonder what it says about my job that the integration of Excel and Photoshop would make my work a LOT easier and more efficient! ►
• this morning i will mainly be creating a large excel spreadsheet – yawn – one day i will have a team of assistants to do this sort of thing ►
• At the end of Dilemma, when Kelly receives that text, why does it show up on an Excel Spreadsheet? :L #weird ►
• If life is throwing you too much: select all->remove duplicates->insert pivot table->count your blessings. You’ll probably get an error. ►
• My boss’ keyboard might as well be in Chinese bc that’s how she looks at it when Excel is open…. ►
• Between Excel refusing to start/recognize any of my files and the revamp in the reporting grid this week’s charts involve a lot of yelling ►
• Getting to the bottom of a excel spreadsheet makes you feel like a magician. ►
• Can’t do work. Lost my stapler. Need my stapler for excel to work. ►
• I dont think it’s so dumb to make an #excel #spreadsheet of your #match.com dates, SENDING it TO one of said dates? Ticket on the DUMB train ►

 

______________

Some people are using Excel to keep track of their online dating, and beauty products. I’d rather have old people problems, like poorly formatted forms.

• My boss just perked up when I said “pivot table”. #NERDALERT ►
• If pivot tables were a source of sustainable nutrition I wouldn’t need to eat for a week. Holy freaking Excel day. #I‘mHungry ►
• Who wakes up a 3am on a Saturday because they had an idea about an Excel chart???? me. thats who. ►
• I reactivated my twitter just to ask if anyone knows how to make a damn graph on excel,help me!!! ►
• Joey made fun of me bc I keep an Excel spreadsheet of my fav beauty products… Ok, so I’m a nerd for beauty, so what?! >;[ ►
• I wish I could write Excel Macros like a boss. My job would be so much easier. ►
• The moment of horror when Excel unexpectedly shuts down your chem lab with 27 different graphs. #saveitplease ►
• I wish I could put the contents of my closet into a pivot table. ►
• finally figured out scroll lock was on after a day of manually clicking between excel cells because arrows “didn’t work” #fml ►
• Poorly formatted Excel forms at work annoy me to no end. I don’t know why people signed off on this crap. #oldpeopleproblems ►
• Nothing more frustrating than working in an Excel spreadsheet where every cell has a live URL in it. Right click+R, you are my new bff. ►
• Open Excel. Give the file a name, save it. That’s my dating spreadsheet. ►
• My boss accidentally showed an excel sheet with all our names listed PLUS a column called “Observed Behavior”. Time to update resume. ►
• Am I the only one who has an Excel spreadsheet of all the artists/songs/albums I’ve ever liked since the age of 12? This is why I’m a loser. ►

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Do you dream about doing Excel stuff all day? Or is that a nightmare? Maybe the answer depends on the pay level.

• I don’t understand people who use these fancy $ budgeting websites. It’s called an Excel spreadsheet, people. Simple as that. ►
• there’s only so long I can stare at an Excel spreadsheet before I go blind! need cute kitty pics stat! ►
• My afternoon has flown by thanks to Excel analysis…does that make me weird? My graphs are pretty ►
• If u hold the down arrow key in an excel 2003 workbook starting at cell A1 it will go as far as A650000 and take 45 mins and 50 secs #bored ►
• My phone just corrected ‘graphs’ to ‘Iraqis’. Now my brother thinks I want help making Iraqis on Excel. #predictivetextfail #simplethings ►
• That or a pivot table. I hear some combination of fire and pivot tables solves most Excel problems. ►
• Hey man you leave Excel alone! Excel rocks. If people used Excel properly no-one would have a problem with it. >:( ►
• With just a capped pen and an LCD monitor, you too can turn a mundane excel spreadsheet into a very unsatisfying game of Fruit Ninja. ►
• Never EVER get bored with #Excel. Surely there must be a (highly paid) job out there that would allow me to “do Excel stuff” all day. ►
• Creepy guy keeps notes on dates, posts them on Excel spreadsheet on internet. Hit him in face with sock full of condensed bellyache please ►
• When I close my eyes all I see is an Excel spreadsheet with numbers swirling around. Getting to sleep tonight should be fun. ►
• I wish everyone got as excited about excel as I did…so they wouldn’t look at me weird when I giggle due to my epic spreadsheet #nerd ►
• This evening – just me, the football, beers and a massive excel spreadsheet. ►
• Making an Excel Workbook idiot-proof. Harder than you may think. ►

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Wine with dinner is an excellent reward, so treat yourself if you’ve spent the day debugging Excel macros.

• Taught myself how to do a pivot table in excel without the help of a BA. My reward? Wine while cooking dinner. #corporateamerica ►
• Just saw a hologram of Tupac working on an Excel pivot table in the office down the row from me. How strange. ►
• First it awakens, then it showers, then it gets dressed, then it brews coffee, then it drives to work, then it opens Microsoft Excel. ►
• Just fill one excel cell with 2-3 paras of info… no problem #sigh #procurement ►
• They should rename “College Degree” to “Expensive Validation You Can Make a Colored Bar Graph in Excel ;-)”. Winking emoticon included. ►
• Damn you “Error 1004: Application-defined or object-defined” for a piece of code that hasn’t changed and WORKED FINE BEFORE!! #Excel ►
• Anyone who is good at excel and able to turn 3 million numbers into a legible graph.. I’m willing to pay ►
• Making a wedding planning spreadsheet. Sad or organised? I’m undecided.. ►
• just spent an hour looking at excel formulas to send out post cards for work. #seriously #fml ►
• Making graphs on excel seem so easy…..yet they are so hard #eme2040 ►
• Nothing says “I’m back at work” like debugging macros in Excel spreadsheets… >.< ►
• When did #excel start sucking so much. I remember when it used to work without crashing ►

___________________

Don’t knock over pencil cups, just because someone wants you to colour code an Excel file. That type of thing should only happen in the Kid Zone.

• Going to bed with stupid excel formulas still on my mind. You may have won today Excel but tomorrow…I OWN you! #sleepwithoneeyeopen ►
• It’s Friday night in Las Vegas and I have an Excel spreadsheet open. #MothersLockUpYourDaughters ►
• you give me a 5 page excel spreadsheet to sort and color code? I knock over your pencil cup.. on purpose. #officejustice ►
• You know what a pivot table is? No? Thank your lucky stars… #excelhell ►
• Eww. Gross. I hate seagulls. They have officially been added to “Things I Hate: The MS Excel Spreadsheet”. ►
• Just created a graph for a 400-level research class using a website called “Kidz Zone” because Excel is too confusing for me. ►
• That moment when you realise excel has incorrectly sorted names & email addresses & you’ve uploaded to the database. #FML ►
• My motto when using Excel to make graphs/charts/pretty things: use ALL the colors!1! ►
• Can I just point out that my phone has EXCEL. For those spreadsheet emergencies… ►
• I’ve created an Excel spreadsheet and line graph clocking my weight loss. I’m micro-managing my vanity. PowerPoint presentation forthcoming. ►
• just got too excited over the fact you can COLOUR CODE tabs in excel (Wedding spreadsheet just got so much better!) ►

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Today’s tweets were hard to believe. Are you sure that nobody cares about making Excel charts? Is it possible that the boss was right about something?

• Now my boss wants to know why weekly cost projections have switched from Excel to a spray painted message on his desk threatening his dog. ► 
• Discovered the keyboard shortcut for switching sheets in an Excel workbook. My excitement about this seems a sad commentary on my life. ►
• This year I’ve resolved to learn VBA for Excel. I’m not too old to learn how to code! ► 
• That awkward moment when you realize your boss was completely right about links to other files in excel. #dontdoit #ruined #analystproblems ►
• Although the creating of graphs etc on excel seems easy, getting it to display the right data seems to be the challenge! Ahhhhh! ►
• Trying to go through this handbook for work and it reads: "This is the single most difficult thing to do on Microsoft Excel" #FML ►
• This morning: thinking about avant-garde periodicals of the 20s. This afternoon: making excel charts of corporate finances #dayjob ► 
• I am dreading tomorrow already. Because tomorrow is going to be spent in a conference room with a thousand excel sheets! #fml ►
• Even now, my fingers itch with the yearning to open up Excel and create vast swaths of color-coded schedule charts. But no! I must not. ►
• Dear Teacher, Nobody cares about making charts in Microsoft Excel! Please let us leave. Sincerely, Your horribly bored student ►
• I hate this job.. you want that messed up data sheet put in excel? Well, I can’t read it and the disorganization gives me a headache. #FML ►
• that is the truth, had to help my boss "because her #s disappeared in excel" she had typed them on white font ►

Related Excel Links

• Excel Charting Tools
• Excel Keyboard Shortcuts 
• Excel VBA School

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It’s fine to yell "Bullseye" occasionally, while working in Excel. Just don’t go to the dark side.

• Haha, I have a good sense of humor and enjoy a good joke, except in the instances listed in the attached Excel spreadsheet. Please forward. ►
• i was going to make you guys a chart, but i don’t know how to use microsft excel. ►
• As a rule I think journalists should try to make their charts look as un-excel like as possible. ► 
• I have made an incredible spreadsheet. It has drop downs, filters, & coloured cells! I wonder if Facebook want to buy it for $10 million? ►
• Staying back at work to run reports… this calls for an Excel party! Have sour candy, upbeat tunes and an empty room 😉 ►
• Have you started writing all your "code" in Word and PowerPoint yet? It’s over when you’re proud of an Excel macro. ►
• I have become one with the spreadsheet, a master of the pivot table. Another netwoker going to the #darkside ► 
• And that is one full year’s worth of participation marks built into a sexy sexy spreadsheet. PS I make sexy spreadsheets. ►
• It should be illegal to put a 100+ line Excel spreadsheet into a PowerPoint presentation. ►
• …just entered data into spreadsheet cell "T16," and whispered, "*Bullseye.*" #starwars #hahaNERD ► 

Related Excel Links

• Excel Charting Tools
• Excel Filters
• Excel VBA School

______________

If Excel could talk, would it really sound like Marvin from The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy? Would it be perfect husband material?

• I typed a date into an excel spreadsheet on Thursday and it changed into a random number. I immediately called the bomb squad. ►
• Am juggling twin tasks of making a pot of sambhar and extracting data from an Excel pivot table. Maami says "Such perfect husband material" ►
• I made an excel spreadsheet cataloging all of my clothes…what kind of monster have I become? ► 
• I’d rather draw my graphs personally on paper, than to watch a YouTube tutorial teaching me how to draw them on Excel #sadunilife ►
• Today spent all day making graphs in Excel. If Excel could speak, I think it would sound like Marvin from Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy. ► 
• Running a macro for pivot tables on excel is *really* not conducive to my current dizziness&threatening nausea. Too much movement going on! ►
• I’d rather take a puck off the collarbone than look at one more spreadsheet #notafinancemajor ►
• Calculating numbers, and creating a pie chart for those numbers without the books help on Excel…..I feel so smart 😉 ►
• You should see the Excel workbook I made for work. Cut our monthly work down by 2 days at least. So complex but so effective. #ButNoPayRaise ►
• Dad looks at my graphs I did on excel "oh what a beauty" "excuse me?" #lovemydad ► 

Related Excel Links

• Excel Charting Tools
• Excel Data Entry Tips
• Excel Pivot Tables

______________

Be nice to Excel, or it could delete all your work. Even your former boss, who makes way too much money, knows that.

• My first Excel spreadsheet, it’s going well. ►
• My info tech lecturer just said #Excel is stupid…THANK YOU!!! iThought it was just me that thought so ►
• The Mrs wanted a simple excel graph from a bank statement. Ended up creating Azure db and reporting services report for it 🙂 #OverDoingIt ► 
• Former boss that makes over $160K just emailed to ask how to sort a sheet in excel…again ► 
• Y none of these educated folk in this ofc knows how 2 use 2007 Excel Pivot Tables? Is it that NONE of us wanna read instructions? YES! ►
• So my professor handed out an excel graph made by an inmate. Can someone tell me how an inmate has access to a computer? ►
• Coffee + Dogs + laptop + me in bed doing some excel spreadsheet accounts work….may stay here all day at this rate ►
• @microsoft_excel should have voice commands…I would be like…"A1 to D12 pivot!" I could make it more dramatic if need be. ►
• I made fun of Excel before and now it’s deleted all my work. Well played, Excel. #sigh ►

Related Excel Links

• Excel Charting Tools
• Excel Functions
• Excel Pivot Tables

______________

It’s spring! Celebrate by making your Excel worksheet look like a rainbow, or an Easter egg explosion.

• Handling someone else’s excel sheet is same as working on someone else’s code. Only no/lesser comments! ► 
• There is no greater pleasure than plotting an upcoming holiday in Europe on an Excel spreadsheet. ► 
• my excel spreadsheet looks an easter egg coloring pack exploded ► 
• Finally tackled the evil excel spreadsheet for the shop that has been glaring at me for 3 months! Bedtime now- well deserved sleep! ►
• Mental note to self: Improve Pivot table skills! ►
• Never thought I’d be writing VB code to validate an Excel spreadsheet prior to saving. God, I’m depressed. ►
• Norah Jones, Gin and Tonic, Excel Spreadsheet ►
• Pivot tables will never ever be equivalent to a quality analysis! Anybody can do a pivot table! ►
• Slow day at the office? Fire up #Excel and make some spreadsheet rainbows. Every great contractor must also be an Excel artist. ►
• Highlight of my day? Learning how to make pivot tables in Excel. Supernerd. ► 
• ZIP code creators clearly didn’t have Excel in mind when they made 0 a starting digit. ►

Related Excel Links

• Excel Conditional Formatting
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel VBA School

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Ignore the grocery checkout guy – it’s perfectly normal to create your shopping list in Excel.

• Just solved a co-worker’s excel problem. WITH SCIENCE. ► 
• Hell is an endless Excel spreadsheet of math and a room of noisy coworkers. ►
• I’ll spend the rest of the day in Excel. You can find me via vlookup(). I’ll hang around the pivot table. ► 
• Mocked by the grocery store checkout dude because I had my shopping list in an Excel spreadsheet. ►
• Shouldn’t have made that stupid GWA calculator excel file cos now the grades under the "lowest acceptable" column are coming true <//////3 ► 
• Instead of messing around with Excel Pivot Tables, I imported the whole deal into MYSQL and got the answers the old fashioned way: hacking. ►
• Choosing Pet Insurance is HARD. I’ve got an excel doc open with pivot tables for 7 carriers, 20 plan options and 7 scenarios of needed care. ► 
• I have spent over 16 hours the last few days on this damn Excel problem. I have decided it’s not me, it’s Excel. ►
• Purple pivot tables in excel 2010. Now I am happy. 🙂 ►
• Time to write about a dangerous weekend in Prince George’s involving more shootings that I can accurately count. Excel chart is essential. ►
• Once I year I bemoan the fact that I don’t know Excel. Just about ready to make a graph with a ruler & crayons. ► 

Related Excel Links

• Excel Charting Tools
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Weekly Meal Planner

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If you won the Mega Millions lottery, you can buy a shoe tracker app. Otherwise, you can just build one in Excel.

• You better believe if I could put that excel workbook on the fridge I would. But the file is massiveeeeee #nerdtweet ► 
• You know you’ve failed in life when you can’t even get excel to make a simple line graph #ipreferthepaperandpendays ►
• I currently have an advanced excel workbook, a hard hat, and baby wipes in my backseat. What is going on?! ► 
• My dad would be ashamed of me right now. I’m sacking Excel for Word as I have noooo clue how to work it! Hahahaha! ►
• The nerd life: Adding used book sale books into home library spreadsheet on a Saturday night. ► 
• I think I need to host a "how to use excel" seminar for folks at work. With emphasis on "how not to overwrite formula cells" ►
• According to my Mega Millions excel worksheet (MMew) the chance of me winning the $500 million is 50% #CantArgueWithStatistics ►
• Dreaming. In horizontal, vertical, compartments, colours and figures. LIFE is a spreadsheet! ► 
• I would be lying if I said I didn’t cry a little in frustration while doing my Excel workbook for IS… #hatethisclass ►
• Love it when you need to make a spreadsheet for something and then find that "there’s an app for that" #ShoeTracker ►
• Argh, my Blue Screen of Death has saved my entire Excel Workbook cell format as Kr currency – I could say a rude word…… ►
• Also, I made graphs to go along with my tax spreadsheet. It’s a nice visualization of my pain. ►

Related Excel Links

• Excel Charting Tools
• Excel Functions
• Excel Tips and Tutorials

______________

Have you made an Excel chart since middle school? If not, maybe an exciting Excel boot camp would help you.

• My Matlab license expired, so I had to make a graph using Excel like some kind of goddamned animal! ►
• thank god my code to crash #excel at random is working properly now. I hate you #vba. ►
• Looking at reports and indulging in some spreadsheet-jiggery-pokery – not exactly my favourite sunny day activity! #stircrazy ►
• I might as well make an Excel Spreadsheet with all the #MEGAMillions tickets I have… ►
• guy stands up in comp lab: "does anybody know how to make a graph in Excel?" girl across the room: "not since middle school…" #truestory ►
• Yes I taught my mom how to create an excel spreadsheet while I was drunk. No I don’t know if it made any sense. #Repeat ►
• Soooo don’t nobody in my group know how to make a spreadsheet in excel –___- ►
• Halfway through my first day of Excel boot camp. Let me make you a spreadsheet and bar graph to show you how exciting it is. ►
• I should write a book on how to speed code with excel. Nothing in the world can beat excel. ►
• I’ve said this, but it really does feel like someone’s bones are being ground to dust when Excel launches and opens a first spreadsheet ►
• I asked the boy for meal ideas for the days ahead – he produced an excel spreadsheet. I love him ►
• I’m convinced my purgatory will be waiting for delivery companies that never show, and filling in excel spreadsheets #FML ►
• After about 6 month #PhD I finally spotted an interesting result 0.026 (as opposed to 0.000) on a spreadsheet. Closest come to being useful! ►
• Dear #Microsoft: I’m glad you receive a notification every time my Excel Spreadsheet crashes. You seem to be doing nothing about it. ►

Related Excel Links

• Excel Charting Tools
• Excel VBA School
• Excel Weekly Meal Planner

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Which could you create faster – Van Gogh’s Starry Night, or a pie chart? Would you need dual monitors to work on your masterpiece?

• I should also sell tickets to watch me wrestle with pivot tables in Excel. Along with heaping mounds of complicated, intertwined data. ► 
• Making a spreadsheet to compare closing cost estimates instead of going to a B movie at a go-go bar. #whatadulthoodlookslike #doesntlookgood ► 
• The code I typed for CS was so effective that it froze my Excel ► 
• Nothing like spending an hour reformatting an excel spreadsheet only to wonder if you shoulda done it another way. #partylikeajournalist ► 
• I could create van Gogh’s Starry Night in PS in under 20 minutes. I’ve been trying to make a pie chart in Excel for over an hour… ►
• It’s a shame that I had to write a macro in order to use a cell reference in the footer of a worksheet in Excel. Foolish. ►
• If any of you want help as to how to create graphs and charts in Excel, I’m your man! Just done them for an hour at college!! ►
• Still at work using excel with dual monitors for my statistics homework. Beats my 9" netbook screen by at least 10 fold. ►
• Thank you for not unfollowing me after 100 tweets about a lost Excel doc. I really love you sometimes. Thanks for being ace and helpful. ►
• Don’t mind me, I’m just here making an Excel spreadsheet of the present tense conjugation of every verb we’ve learned so far this semester ►
• Whenever i touch an excel sheet, it soon turns into a chaotic mess of charts, graphs and multiple worksheets. I need some discipline ►
• just had to figure out how to make an excel graph. with error bars and all that crap. i can see college now 🙁 ► 

Related Excel Links

• Excel Charting Tools
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel VBA School

______________

Excel wizardry and Pivot Table terror – it can affect you, even if you’re old, and working in Canada.

• Why is one of Canada’s largest companies using excel 2003. My graphs suck ►
• Successfully made my first line graph on Excel. Only took an hour + to figure out. #fml #computergenius ► 
• Today an employee asked me if she could color code an excel sheet and was there a way I’d prefer it done. I love this woman. ► 
• Mail merge madness and excel hell. Pivot table terror. ►
• that awkward moment when a relatively cute guy asks for help on something as simple as putting a pie chart into Excel…#ohcollege. ►
• I should do the washing up but i’m too busy basking in my victory over Daves excel problem. Man…I really need a job. ►
• Leaving work at 10.30pm after staring at excel spreadsheets for 12 and a half hours… And people think working in tv is glamorous! ►
• This must be what it’s like for old people trying to use a computer.. I CAN NOT work out how to draw this graph on excel! #ComputerInvalid ► 
• I love it when a plan comes together. Even when it’s limited to nerdy statistics and Excel wizardry. ► 
• HR wants me to hire someone that doesn’t know the difference between a sheet and a workbook in Excel … wow ► 
• My composer spreadsheet database would be so much more awesome if I was allowed to put text in the pivot table data field. #nerd #sorry ► 

Related Excel Links

• Excel Charting Tools
• Excel Data Entry Tips
• Excel Pivot Tables

______________

If your dad wants you to become an accountant, just pretend that you don’t know enough Excel. Maybe you could slice bread for a living instead.

• After working in excel for 3 hours, "Do you want to save the changes you made?"… You probably know what I clicked. #FML ► 
• When you work with an accounting department, you cant but feel that excel is the greatest thing man invented..not that slice bread. ► 
• I have come to a conclusion that all the successful people are brilliant at Excel, whereas I struggle to make a simple 3-variable pie chart. ► 
• Opening bell, LCD Soundsystem, Excel, and 30mg of work ethic all hit me at once; the joyous symphony of Monday morning. ► 
• And stupid excel. Rounded off a bank account and now I get in trouble for that 😐 ►
• Just discovered you can’t use medians in pivot tables in Excel? Seriously? ►
• I optimized someone’s Excel VBA code. Execution time from 3hours to 1min. Same number of code lines… That’s awesome! #LessTimeWasted ►
• well staring at an excel spreadsheet for hours gives me a headache .. glad im not going to be an accountant like my dad wanted me to be ► 
• Dude in my computer class kept sayin "Ima punch this computer in the face" & "I will fight a computer" cause he couldn’t work Excel properly ► 
• During naptime today I ____. (My answer: made a boatload of tables + charts in Ppt/Excel.) #toddlermom #workingmom ► 
• Just spot some bugs in a spreadsheet made by other departments…I would pretend that I don’t know excel enough to fix it –..- ► 

Related Excel Links

• Excel Charting Tools
• Excel Functions
• Excel VBA School

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