No matter how bad things get in Excel, remember to keep calm and carry on. Maybe some club music, or a few minutes in the freezing outdoors, would relax you. Made a lot of stupid Excel mistakes last night… They were all blindingly obvious after a full nights sleep. Damn it! Excel just crashed. Lost…
Yesterday was the start of a new week, and some people weren’t thrilled to be back in the office, making Excel pivot tables and charts. Maybe that’s why they have meetings at a burger joint instead. It’s Monday so it must be time for the spreadsheet of doom and the phone call of stupidity. Follwed…
Remember kids — don’t talk to strangers, even if they offer you a tempting Excel form. And don’t overdo the pivot tables — that could fry your brain, or cause double rainbow meltdowns. It’s a scary world! You should give it a shot. I don’t use Excel for anything complicated, just to placate my OCD…
That tweeter is crazy! The new ASUS Slate looks awesome, especially when you see Excel on it. It might be tempting, if I had an extra bag of money lying around the office. All in all we’re just another part of a cell in an excel spreadsheet wall I’ve spent my entire morning making a…
Is it easier to talk to the animals, or to Excel? Today Hangman, tomorrow a multi-user lobby system and 2 player battleships. I <3 @Office #Excel VBA dev. Rmbr: in PR/Mrkting you are only as effective as your contact spreadsheet. By they way, you know you can use the REPT() function in Excel to create…
If you don’t know the difference between a pivot table and an Excel table, just read the article. Don’t let your frustration lead to regrettable acts, like cheating on Excel, or insulting your co-workers. Wish I was an Excel genius. I could open a file and do some work then. I don’t know if my…
Careful! You never know when you’ll run into a shark or exploding donut in Excel. i hate how i still dont know how to use excel so i have to do all of my charts on paint 🙁 Does anybody know how to work Excel? I can’t seem to get these formulas working for an…
If you’re preparing for an Excel exam, the first thing you should learn is how to spell Excel. You can focus on Valentine’s Day dinners, and steam punk pivot tables, later. note to self: never assume that excel will know what you want it to do…idiot. I really fancy trying to make a semi automatic…
Funny…the Excel T function was covered this weekend in the 30 Excel Functions in 30 Days challenge, and people were tweeting about tea and Excel. Coincidence? You be the judge. Never ever ever ever check your work email at midnight. Almost one and I’m on mission that involves Facebook and Excel. I do excel spreadsheets…
Chuck Norris, Vincent Vega, or Macallan scotch — which one helps you conquer Excel, and its powerful pivot tables? I once taught Chuck Norris how to use vlookup. The PIVOT TABLE! I thought you were a cruel Enemy but now I have a best friend!!! PS I hate you Excel… Just finished drawing four pie…
Thanks to the Excel 25th birthday celebrations, people are sharing their Excel memories. Meanwhile, back in the office, overworked hands are turning into claws — there must be some medication for that! #Excel has text styles named "Normal", "Good", "Bad", and "Neutral" but no "Freakalicious". Stupid #Microsoft. OH: ‘why can’t I just have an excel…
Wasn’t Excel’s 25th birthday in September? Anyway, there’s lots of celebrating going on now, so have a piece of cake, or pie, and enjoy a day with wicked awesome spreadsheets. Microsoft #Excel is older than the college grad you just hired. http://bit.ly/htSSRf #depressing After six hours of copying radio stories into an excel spreadsheet I’ve…
With its pie charts and VLOOKUPs, Excel can help you rule the world. Or at least your small corner of the world. I wonder if there is a web application for world domination. I feel like I can control my whole world from a spread sheet …#planning #excel Beyond pie charts: can "proportion-of-a-whole" be taken…
Twitter, YouTube, Quora, Starbucks — how did we ever solve our Excel problems before these amazing resources were available? I just drank starbucks and mastered the spreadsheet on microsoft excel. #doworkson Loved, loathed, feared, misunderstood — #Excel VLOOKUP http://goo.gl/kJOXc fighting with the pivot tables at present. Once I have gone into pivot mode cant work…
Well, the weekend is over, so that poor guy is back to his Excel files. I hope he enjoyed a few pitchers on the weekend, got some sleep, and didn’t tweak any pivot charts. spreadsheet overload. Time for a beer break….. Omg, computer says "fatal error" stupid excel and formulas……3hrs of work down the drain!!!!…
Ah yes, fugly pie charts. They make cat videos look like fine art. #excel getting shaky… 52 columns x 796,984 rows = 41,443,168 cells… hang in there little buddy I may appreciate the beauty of a well put together spreadsheet, but that definitely doesn’t make data entry my dream… This is gonna sound stupid, but…
If your only conversations are with Excel’s Text-to-Speech feature, it might be time to get out of your cubicle. You could take an educational psychology class, or ask a co-worker to sort one of your Excel sheets. Trying to create a pivot table in Excel. Because I am twelve, "pivot table" seems mildly smutty and…
Excel pivot table books as romance novels — why didn’t I think of that! The movie version could feature Chuck Norris, and a few pretty charts. I am super pleased with my budget spreadsheet. Which is sort of a sad commentary on how exciting my life is right now. I HATE it when I do…
The year in Excel is off to a good start, with sex, sword fights and dragon slaying. Those experiencing heart attacks and stolen stuff are probably using obsolete technology. One group of people who freak me out? People who LOVE excel spreadsheets. spreadsheet != table, there is a lot more to a spreadsheet other than…
Anyone can use Excel, even a handyman or dinosaur. Just remember to pace yourself at the start of the year, when there’s so much work to do, and you’re still a bit tipsy. I still turn to VBA / Excel / Access to solve many a quick and dirty problem. Not sure if I am…
Over the weekend, people used Excel to wrap up 2010, and get ready for 2011. The bravest ones helped their family members too! Maybe we’ll all have assistants next year, or some beer, to make the work easier. Cracked a beer & an Excel spreadsheet. It’s time to budget for 2011! Yep, another wild Saturday…
Happy New Year! Wishing you a colour-coded year with no evil spreadsheets, and plenty of VLookups and other sexy formulas. you know you secretly love excel. especially vlookups. instead of having kids, we do something abstract with excel? it’s just stupid. Worked out, did laundry, cleaned apt, created a 2011 Excel budget, did work and…
Who crashes more often — a ski bunny or an Excel bunny? It might be safer to stick to grocery shopping, or working in bed. Working in bed. Not nearly as exciting as it sounds- Unless you love Excel just that much. Ski bunny? Better than Spreadsheet Bunny. Vale Bunny over Excel Bunny any day….
A day in Excel leads to screaming, craps, glitter and forehead smacks. And you think that your family is odd! It’s as if someone looked at the excel spreadsheet and said, "If only I had just one more color to get my point across…" I need to figure out some way to embed a forehead…
Ah, Spreadsheet Wasteland…where you tear your hair out, while boiling eggs and tracking stupid calls. Excel skills deteriorate over time if not used. I’ve forgotten 2/3 of the crapola I knew 10 years ago. i can’t get my excel to work!! Minor annoyance to me: when people only use one spreadsheet in Excel and don’t…
It’s almost the end of the year, and people are using Excel to take stock of the past year, and plan for the new year — even if they’d rather go shopping for a new TV, or tell bad Christmas jokes instead!! Excel 11 columns x 1500 rows done.Tea break now.Staring at the ceiling.Sunlight merging…
A few people were tweeting about Excel over the weekend, and not surprisingly, some of these tweets were about using Excel for Christmas activities. There were other interesting topics mixed in, like Japanese food, baseball, and haiku. And always remember, Han shot first. It sucks to work on Christmas, but I was behind. Got most…
Merry Christmas! Maybe you’re at work today, or at home, and trying to get away from the festivities for a few minutes. For your entertainment, here are a few Christmas themed Excel tweets — you’re not the only one who thinks that Excel and Christmas were made for each other! Right. Commencing the final wrapping…
It’s finally Christmas Eve! Even the most devoted Excel users might take the next day or two off, and step away from their computers. Happy holidays! Suspect that polar bear wrestling may be easier than getting this bloody spreadsheet to work. Tackling an Excel spreadsheet/workbook this afternoon….long overdue but must be done before the end…
The Pivot Table Wizard is gone now, so you’ll have to go back to Excel 2003 if you want to see the checkered flag. wow… all this excel vba is coming back to me like leaves on trees! i love it! super fun!!!! What’s some good ass-kicking, yet work appropriate music to listen to? Need…
A dog, a dork or a hammer — only one of these can plan your Christmas dinner, trim the tree, and calculate builder payments — all in Excel. When all you have is a hammer, every problem is a nail. When what you have is Excel, every answer is a pivot table. Just finished planning…
The holiday season is stressful enough — don’t move the shared Excel file! Oh, and don’t use shared workbooks. I’ve been bested by a spreadsheet. I think I have algo-arrhythmia. Hoping desperately that the horrid Excel spreadsheet will actually be completed in my absence. I saved the excel spreadsheet but I’ll be damned if I…
How was your weekend? Did your Excel workbooks help with the Christmas planning and best album charting? Or were you driven insane by Excel’s crashes and beach balls? Hmmm…from the end, a beach ball looks just like a pie chart! I love using excel to make things easier to visualize and understand! (p.s. i just…
To work in Excel you just need common sense, and a box of crayons. And it’s too late to send those international holiday cards, so just step away from the spreadsheet. I hate excel…I changed one thing now I have to change a whole worksheet Holy pivot tables. By the end of today I will…
Wow, that guy is lucky! We didn’t have calculators when I was in 7th grade. Well, at least not the kind that kids were able to lift, or carry in their pockets. I use Excel to concatenate geeky code streams. May I join your club? Did a rather complex Excel Pivot Table reading MySQL database….
I wonder what candle scent would be best when working on an ammo pricing Excel sheet, or a meaningless chart. I asked our IT teacher if I can go for just 15 minutes to donate my blood and she said NO "Excel" is important XD Oversized sweater. Puffy socks. Cinnamon candles. Fireplace. Home Alone. Hot…