Category: Excel Humor

Awesome — a boss with a sense of humour. That almost makes up for a lack of Excel skills. Of course, we can debate that, during yoga class.  

• not yet, ah i don’t even know how to use excel 🙁 but i’ll attempt it tonight, is it hard?
• Only in my world does a quick Skype message to a friend before the end of work lead straight into nested IF functions in Excel *sigh*
• Why does excel take so long to calculate pivot tables??? #geektweet
• I make beautiful excel pie charts #justsaying. I’m copy righting the name Piecharto ©. In other news I’m hungry for some reason.
• This debate is just one long list of percentages. Like televising an Excel spreadsheet. #bland #yawn #senedd2011
• I just devoted 10m to embedding the War3 Orc "Work Done" wav into an excel macro. Yes, it was that important.
• I could’ve used Excel to do this entire 1.5 hour lecture’s work in 5 minutes.
• Boss: How do you do this thing on EXCEL? Me: Did you Google it? Boss: Did you Google how to file for unemployment? #SSG #WorkTweet
• Currently having one of those very rare moments I wish I knew how to use Excel to make charts and stuff. It would be helpful.
• I [heart] #excel macros. That is all.
• Welcome back to #excel hell. List lists everywhere and not a drop to drink.
• My boss can’t use Excel, nor locate a lost Outlook temp file, but yet is Director of I.T, how do I resolve this? 🙂
• Busy day at work = lack of tweets. #excel
• i know how to do the excel but 1 mistake ruined the whole workbook. =( unfortunately it ruined my grade too ='(
• Hmm, seems that I’ve arrived at work sans motivation. Maybe I’ll get some shortly once I’ve fiddled with excel.
• #Excel the only Microsoft program worth a darn. #truth
• Reports, excel charts, phones, email; all in my cubical. Do you ever feel more like a factory click-worker than a "knowledge worker"?
• Quote of the day "The problem with excel is you know you’re doing something incredibly boring if you even have to open it."
• Seems that I have my work brain on. Every time the yoga instructor said "exhale" I heard "Excel" #retired

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Related Links:

• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel VBA
• Excel Functions

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That Barbie workbook was pink, I’m sure, and would probably make you feel queasy. At least the boss wasn’t working on that – her Excel file was blue!

• I just spent the past 30min w/my boss picking out a shade of blue to color her Excel spreadsheet. #thatkindofday
• They see their lives through screenshot eyes/ take courage with the pivot table’s final say / make choices when they sign on the dotted line
• Loving the fact my husband knows how to create graphs and charts using Excel and doing my extra credit assignment for me
• Messy excel files give me the creeps. Having to work with one makes me want to recoil. *shudder*
• oh lord…she want me to do excel……….
• Nothing can kill motivation faster than losing 2.5 hrs of work in excel because of a blue screen. Gonna keep fighting tho #DangerVsMonday
• Saddest thing of all: still not clear on the answer. Time to procrastinate with a pivot table or something.
• The thought of a spreadsheet makes me feel slightly queasy
• Nerd alert: organized all my monthly expenditures into a nice Excel document, complete with pie charts!
• still can’t believed i made a Microsoft Excel workbook for my barbies. INCREDIBLE ?(•??~•~)?
• if I had an "i <3 geeks" shirt I woold dedicate it to you and your awesome excel spreadsheet 😉 I am making one after work I think
• Last work day of the week, and my computer was pulled out for repairs. Trying to mentally edit an Excel. #fb
• What the heck is this "pivot table" nonsense, anyway? If I wanted to pivot I would have bought a Sit & Spin.
• Just showed a customer how to do a pivot table and saved him a couple of hours work per month. I was popular!
• ooh, it could be so worse, you could be sitting in front of a pile of receipts and one unhappy looking spreadsheet…
• Excel spreadsheet, you can not be this persnickety today please. Thanks.
• mustering up the motivation to work on a finance project, but mostly staring at a blank excel spreadsheet morosely
• Last night i dreamt of pivot tables again. yes, pivot tables & yes AGAIN! i need to use excel less.
• if i have to work on another excel report i might just explode into binary

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Templates

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What’s wrong with running PowerPivot on XP? I don’t have to justify myself! But it’s strange that the tweeter assumes I’m a man – maybe I need more rainbows, and less dynamite, on my website.

• Wunderkind: a young lad with basic familiarity of Excel (today it was "The Pivot Table") in an office full of baby boom computer illiterates
• Zac can count. Zac understands calculators. Now all I need to teach him is pivot tables in Excel and I can send him to work to do my job 🙂
• Love it- excel is the fisherprice of programming… #trampoline
• Hacked my way into someone’s password-protected Excel file to look at their VBA code. Nerdy, but super cool and fun.
• I am at the "Excel spreadsheet open as I pretend to do work I don’t have because there is none" part of the day
• This man is running PowerPivot on XP. Strange… http://www.contextures.com/PowerPivot-Identical-Excel-Files.html
• Co-worker asked me why the text in an excel spreadsheet wasn’t lined up right. I almost told him "I don’t have to justify myself to you!"
• why do physics professors love excel?
• Showing my weekly budget paperwork who’s boss: ME (as long as Microsoft Excel says it’s okay).
• it’s an excel macro? They don’t work on twitter, just excell
• Stupid excel, make the damn graph!!!
• New found love – Nephew and Microsoft Excel. And they don’t go together
• One of these days I’ll swear-off getting involved in projects where the "application" is an Excel worksheet.
• So I found a cost/street value excel spreadsheet calculator for Cocaine on my computer.
• It’s quarter past midnight and I’m designing spreadsheets for work. Sad MS Excel addict much?
• Dear work: why exactly is it ‘inappropriate’ to yell "BOOM GOES THE DYNAMITE!" when I get an excel spreadsheet formula correct?
• My husband is making an Excel spreadsheet detailing my son’s Thomas collection and the value of each piece. #lovemygeek
• OH in conversation between two financial analysts: FA1 "I love Excel." FA2 "Oh man, me too." #geekingoutoverExcel
• I swear #Excel should limit you to 4 colours until you’ve proven you can use them effectively. #SeeingRainbows

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Related Links:

• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel VBA
• PowerPivot for Excel 2010

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Cursing John Walkenbach – didn’t they make a movie about that, starring John Cusack and Cameron Diaz? And speaking of movies, don’t let that Invesco video give you pie chart nightmares!

• Prior to this Excel class if my boss had asked me to Concatenate his Function I might have sued for harassment…
• Curse you Walkenbach! All these curly brackets! What sort of twisted formula is this? #excel #arrays
• The 2 most abused software applications in the business world: #Excel & #PowerPoint.
• Excel nightmares. Watch out for pie charts! — Invesco "It Can Happen" http://t.co/M0CY5HP via @youtube
• May have momentarily forgotten that iTunes wasn’t excel and tried to hide rows the got confused when it didnt work….
• Ooh I do love a pivot table #ivebeeninthelibrarytoolong
• Just got a website concept as an #excel file – why do people stuff like that? why? 🙂 #facePalm
• I was so bored at work i took the time to find out that microsoft excel is capable having only 65536 rows #thatsit
• quickbooks: you’re complicated & fussy! i’m going back to my old love, excel. consider this your post-it note breakup. #smallbusiness
• I need some food before trying to understand the formulas in that spreadsheet?!? feed the brain!
• I currently have 18 Excel docs open. I need a spreadsheet to manage the spreadsheets.
• Big ‘IF THEN’ statement in #excel is killing me!
• Wrote my first decidedly elegant line of code. Awesome feeling. On excel but still.
• i din’t know how sophisticated an excel spreadsheet can be. i feel like a grown up creating all this formula and piecharts. #microsoftoffice
• I work that kind of thing out in my head. Dont need excel for that. The answer is42!
• On my way to see Big Audio Dynamite and watching Excel pivot table tutorials. #NeverADullMoment
• Entering formulas into excel. Like a boss.
• Excel cannot complete this task with available resources. Choose less data What? I’m only creating a pivot table from 52,000 rows of data
• Someone just told me that he doesn’t have Excel, so he can’t open the spreadsheet I sent. He should look into updating that Commodore 64.

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Functions

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Yes, it does sound tempting to run off and drink champagne, but no one said it would be easy. Stay at your desk, and savour the small Excel victories.

• Ever noticed that the only time you work on learning Excel is when you actually need to do something with it and it is due today? Yep.
• You know you have a problem when Excel shows up in your dreams. Waking up bored is not a great way to start the day!
• I hated working in an office, but I sure do love being able to find my way around an excel spreadsheet!
• The secret of manipulating bin sizes in a spreadsheet is slowly revealing itself. But … #excel #statistics
• One of the most underrated and important work skills: Knowing how to use Excel properly.
• Anyone out there know MS Excel???? And by know, I mean KNOW. I have a problem that’s more advanced than how to add two cells together.
• I’m not making an Excel spreadsheet for DJ-ing with BPM, cue points, and EQ notes. Psh! Do you think I’m an effing Ravenclaw? *shifty eyes*
• If I see another pivot table I’m going to *something* *something*.
• Much rather be guzzling free champers at the new #m&s opening on #eccy road than staring at an Excel spreadsheet #cheersies
• No one said it would be easy. And then they asked for an Excel spreadsheet.
• Oh dear I’ve sent people a spreadsheet where the text is aligned all rubbishly so if they’re like me they’ll be annoyed. Oops.
• Today I tell the young ones a little about code and language and some more excel. Sorting and graphs. Think they will like the graphing.
• Throughout the work day its the minor Excel victories that make you really proud. And lame. #Me
• Anyone wanting to hide information from me should just put it in a spreadsheet and email it to me.
• I’d rather spend my entire day in front an Excel spreadsheet than anything else in the whole-wide-world. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
• The biggest problem with Excel is its mere existence. #hugeproblem
• If you’ve got a problem, and no one else can help…just build a spreadsheet. Thank you excel for your help once again xx#SpreadsheetsRock
• Excel No One #moviedayattheoffice
• oh excel sheets…I loathe and love you. you’re the Ike to my Tina #datasheets

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Related Links:

• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel VBA
• Excel Functions

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You’ve heard of Excel pie charts, but what about custard charts? They sound equally delicious! And disarming.

• I’m the Director of IT at my office. Excel just shutdown and I lost a days worth of work. Just so you know it happens to us too.
• i love how the "show quick preview" printing option in excel bogs my machine down and takes a good 2-3 minutes.
• My Excel Geekometer went off the charts today when I unlocked the world of programmatically controlling Essbase with VBA. #sendhelp
• With statistics functions, I am entering strange waters. NORMDIST is a reassuring function though. Acts as my anchor. #excel
• So…a person was hired to use Excel AND HAS NEVER USED EXCEL. And this is now my problem?
• Just solved a complicated excel formula problem. Moral of story: F comes after E not before.
• it appears you can disarm bombs by using ms excel! http://t.co/ASiNQHM
• I put all of the excel sheets I needed in one workbook so I didn’t have to set print settings for each sheet. Guess what? You still have to.
• I almost cried earlier cus I didnt knw how to work microsoft excel for my project. But thank God for youtube videos lol
• Sorry Mr Salesman, that spreadsheet is misnamed it should be "pipedream" not "pipeline"!
• So much for me getting off work on time – stuck with a stupid excel issue for a user – uuuggghhh
• The excel problem now seems to be, it can’t tell if things like 02/12/10 are MM/DD/YY or DD/MM/YY.
• There are no stupid questions when it comes to MS Excel, just stupid people. #googleitdamnit
• No work for me today! Instead I’m going to become a Excel Super User…hope they have STRONG coffee!
• If I hide from this spreadsheet, will it solve its own problems?
• Yay for being able to paste conditional formatting across all tabs! Wasn’t sure if that would work. #Excel #IAmANerd
• Have started answering the phone at work as ‘excel help desk’ #fml
• New Goal: Learn #Excel Programming in next 15 days. How uncool can I be 🙁
• were making custard charts according to my excel 2 teacher at JCCC. yummm making me hungry. #itsclustersmartprofessor.

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Functions
• Excel Conditional Formatting

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A pig, some bricks, and a whiz. No, it’s not a fairytale, it’s just another day in Excel. Grab some coffee and buttered paper, and get started.

• if i were you i’d just delete the excel worksheet, uninstall excel and tell your (big?) boss to shove it…. but i’m not you =)
• I wish Excel would default to a 0 gap width for bar charts.
• oooh i remember setting up my first drop down list, pivot table and the ultimate "vlookups".
• Yes!! I feel restless! Maybe I’m getting Spreadsheet Withdrawl Syndrome! Lol
• Funny observation: when entering a function in a spreadsheet you have to start with =( maybe that’s why math makes me sad 😉
• Is it sad that I’d rather get a lower grade in class than pay $197 for a CD with some stupid excel files? #tightwad
• Oh Excel conditional formatting, how I love thee. Colour coded my spreadsheet in a way that would have taken hours. #TimeForASmugBrew
• Now on BBC4; the true story of Florence Nightingale and her use of Microsoft Excel charts and pivot tables. Way ahead of her time.
• When I was 8 a spreadsheet was something you did before you made a fort out of old bricks in the garden.
• Somebody played 52 card pick-up with my spreadsheet.
• Boss looking for an "Excel Whiz" to make a table for him. He’ll be so excited when he finds out I can also use the ‘Sum’ function.
• Public service announcement. If you can use Excel functions but don’t use pivot tables, learn pivot tables. Really, they’re the best.
• Pens and paper make a refreshing change from powerpoint and excel. Real office beats MS Office everytime…
• i love excel. i don’t do a lot of formula stuff but can do data coloration etc.
• You’ll all be pleased to hear that it’s a day of spreadsheet analysis for me. like a pig in mud lol
• i still don’t think i know what a spreadsheet is. the word makes me think of buttered paper
• Ladies and gentlemen of Twitter: an announcement. I HAVE MADE A PIVOT TABLE WORK ALL BY MYSELF. #success
• Best way to start the morning you ask??? #Coffee and #spreadsheets. Don’t know why I’m so addicted to Microsoft #excel
• it’s called a pivot table sweetie. Need some excel tutoring and a tissue?

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Related Links:

• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel VLOOKUP Function
• Excel Conditional Formatting

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Don’t blame Excel when your wedding goes over budget – it can’t order a fighter jet on its own! However, pastel pie charts wouldn’t cost much, and make lovely decorations.

• I wonder what the world would be like without Excel.
• Ok, I think my spreadsheet is now current. Dear COO, please to be not adding anything new to it, else my head might explode. /frazzled
• New addition to the ultimate wedding spreadsheet "fighter jet flyover"#goingtogetintrouble
• btw i can teach you pivot tables, but only on older versions of excel — the 2007 version blows.
• Is it me, or is Excel 2007 just plain sluggish?
• Making pie… charts that is. The default colors for charts in Excel are terrible. Nothing like pastels to grab someones eye < sarcasm
• I have mad love for MS Excel, those functions, curly formulas, macros *sigh* I’m in love #spreadsheetSwagger
• Just bought a book on VBA code in Excel from Amazon. #nerdwinning
• excel pivot tables do stink!! Why can’t they simplify that process? Not rocket science! Or- wait-maybe it is after all!
• Do new versions of Excel have the international date format built in? Because not having that is just stupid.
• I love mathematical modelling on excel….its a great destresser
• I love inserting comments in excel sheets. The small text boxes with arrows pointing to the cells excite me. Lol!
• Not that said coworker intentionally confused his code… that’s just the nature of the beast when working in Excel. Ugh.
• I hate Excel.I do,however,love my secretary (an appropriate amount).altho its her fault I am lazy&have an IT skills gap!
• I wrote between 12K and 20K lines of code today. Well not me excel did most of the work. I am the worlds most inefficient code monkey.
• Just wrote an #excel formula that line-wraps 3 times. If I hadn’t written it myself, it would look like an alien language.
• Ughh comp died and excel lost half my data of the populations of the 200 countries in the world #fml
• Just found some SUMPRODUCTs in an old spreadsheet I made. SUMPRODUCT…? SUMPRODUCT..? Ah! I remember those… *wistful sigh*
• Always play to your strengths. I spent 5 minutes making charts on an excel spreadsheet and my group totally thinks I’m pulling my weight.

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel VBA

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Back to work after a lovely spring weekend, and some people are cringing when they open Excel. What about you? Hung over? Or Awesome?

• Burying myself in a spreadsheet, hiding from the METs playing consistently – consistently bad pitching, consistently bad clutch hitting…
• sleeeeeeeepppp – this spreadsheet was a far more complex mire of cells than I was expecting
• Created a spreadsheet and graph on my mac to chart the progress of my book – procrastination to the extreme!
• Pretty sure I need Excel training – I can barely sort by column, and WTF is a pivot table? Yes I know I’m in IT….
• Working out what books to buy with the help of a spreadsheet. I’m just that cool.
• *cringe* opening up excel. on purpose. not for client work.
• You know what’s awesome? Working on an excel worksheet all morning, and then accidentally exiting without saving it. That’s genius. :/
• I’m probably doing the nerdiest, lamest thing anyone could be doing right now: An excel spreadsheet for my Magic cards as a database. 8D
• Well work has brainwashed me to the point of I cannot decipher information that is not in the form of an Excel spreadsheet.
• I just created a colour-coded ‘new house’ spreadsheet, with formulae and everything. Man, being responsible is so time consuming…
• Problem solving, yes. Playing with MS Word or macros in Excel, no.
• woke up early to try and finish some school work…it took me 2 hours to make a graph on excel… #hungover
• High-fives and shouts of joy as we set up Excel sales reports with conditional formulas…and they work. #nerdalert
• All done voting. Heading back to work now ? Excel is my lover for the day, we shall make sweet spreadsheets together #sexy #donthate
• My work from home plan mildly failed because I forgot I have Excel 2007 and I barely know how to use it. #FAIL
• Curse these arrays. They reject variable cell addresses. If I were Ricardo Montalban I would say they task me. #excel #arrays #Khan!
• Great day today, dog sit, work on excel, yanks vs sox, masters, spurs, then watching james kirkland box tonight! Holler!
• trying to do some simple analyses on some data for my latest assignment – When exactly does Microsoft Excel ever actually #excel?

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Conditional Formatting

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Unlike Marshall’s company, we don’t have a graphics department. But if we had one, they could work on the Zombie Apocalypse prediction charts.

• I hate it when info for a spreadsheet is plopped in my lap at the last second, and i’m told to "make sense of all this".
• Excel – you are rubbish, I mean total rubbish! There was no problem saving the file, so why does it take 4 PCs & 6 reboots to open it?
• Always seem to shut my laptop down and find zillions of leftover text files with Excel formulae or code snippets… Am I the only one?!
• decided to come into work to help my boss catch up on things…bad move. now im trapped here doing excel work.
• Would be surprised if one day I get "Excel Services can’t render workbook because the spreadsheet was created in excel" #Failed
• My new workbook in Excel is Book76. I haven’t closed Excel in awhile.
• This is a ‘sit in the park and eat ice cream’ afternoon, not a ‘sit in the office and fight with Excel’ one.
• I’m surrounded by 3 monitors of excel with recursive pivot tables trying to predict the Zombie Apocalypse.
• Just got done with an excel mind puzzle at work. Learned 5 new formulas today!
• i’m breaking down the structure of parks and rec scripts. i make crazy color coded charts in excel. does anyone else do this?
• i just figured out how to make Pie Charts in Excel. i feel like Marshall on HIMYM. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GaIGSOvjYec
• what is so hard about filling out a PREMADE excel spreadsheet? i mean REALLY people… #really
• Surprisingly, there were no results for the Google search "excel is from hades". Hmm. #excel
• I just figured out a simple ‘adjacent tile’ algorithm for my assignment, but using Excel to work with. I think I need to be slapped.
• It’s funny what software people use sometimes. I’ve never seen a website designed in MS Excel before 🙂
• #Wisconsin, good thing that the spreadsheet was in Excel 2007! If it’s wrong it’s wrong doesn’t matter the Excel version! :s
• I would be lying if I said I didn’t judge auditors by their use of comment boxes, merged cells, or text boxes. #excel #auditors
• You know where you’re talking to someone and you think ‘can you get any more boring?’… I don’t care about your spreadsheet problems!
• I just lost my pivot table virginity!!!

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel VBA

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The cautionary Excel tale warns about sorting disasters, but doesn’t mention frozen 3D pie charts or sunken pivot tables. Be careful out there!

• Spreadsheets have a more than passing resemblance to #battleship. ie: "You just sunk my pivot table!"
• I’ve never had any performance issues with my computer. But apparently running a pivot table on 2 million records in Access is a lil much.
• Made the transition from Office 2003 to 2007. I find myself in a conditional formatting jungle. #excel
• Just put together a spreadsheet for organising babysitters. Unnerved and pleased in equal proportions.
• I wanted to show off an HLOOKUP formula I just wrote, but it was 36 characters too long for Twitter. Too bad. #excel #nerd
• Screw you pivot table. You won’t do what I want I’ll just extract the data myself! Ha!!
• ugh, the absolute worst time to have Excel crash is when you hit the "save" button #fml
• a more #helpful message from #excel would be: "It’s too late, go to bed"
• I love Excel. No, really, it’s true. I do. I might marry it one day, just to broadcast to the world my commitment to it. #ultimatesarcasm
• Just learned a new #Excel function: SUBSTITUTE. Helpful little bugger in the right situation, but isn’t everything like that. #nerd
• I’ve just learned about Excel’s 1900 and 1904 date systems. Unbelievable. Microsoft has redefined the word stupid. I’m being diplomatic.
• If I have to look at one more excel spreadsheet with codes on, I will cry!
• wish I’d known about paste special -> transpose a long, long time ago. #excel #grades
• copying old e-mail addresses from paper to excel is.. interesting, important and valued work-task. Sure it is. #rant
• Music has taken over my academic priorities. Working on some Excel charts and getting my mind right.
• A cautionary tale for everyone who uses #Excel in their cubicles: http://j.mp/hH3Vtr #neuroskeptic
• I like to color-code my excel spreadsheets. #thingsdorkssay #iamadork
• I might be making peace with Microsoft #excel. Moving some of my metrics from txt files to excel sheets. Conditional formatting=Awesome.
• I just deliberately made a 3D pie chart and Excel froze up. See? I told you 3D pie charts are terrible!

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Functions

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Some people love Excel, and are applauded for their efforts. Others think Excel is a nightmare, and too cruel to use.

• Got bored at work, tried to make a game in Excel during dead time. You know what? Excel is not an effective platform for entertainment.
• In lecture bored, I learned about charts in Excel back in 2003..
• Excel spreadsheets look sexier at 85% zoom #excel
• Excel froze after 90 mins worth of work. It’s been 15 minutes. I was hoping it would unfreeze so I don’t lose my work. I didn’t save. #FML
• I love that for all the fancy things Excel can do, bolding a row can bring it to its knees. Why is that? #intheyear2000
• uh-oh… ppl at work are starting to think of me as an excel whiz. hope this won’t make me keep this financial mgmt responsibility. 🙁
• Gettin’ my spreadsheet on this AM. Advanced Budget Templates for Excel. It’s going to be rows of fun and columns of knowledge up in here.
• Figured out my excel spreadsheet problem….at 3am this morning. Fortunately I was at work and had the file in front of me. SOOO tired
• Today, i got a round of applause for my unhealthy love of Excel spreadsheets #oteam11
• Has finally broken free from his excel prison! Love stats but it was getting a bit too much #SuperGeek #DeathByAdmin
• Visual Basic in Excel is Awesome. A strange data problem was a piece of cake using VB and Macros. And it’s solved before breakfast. Sweet!
• Melancholy: The feeling when you realize that 1 tiny change in an excel sheet could have saved 10+ hours work. It’ll come in handy though.
• I bloody love making graphs on excel..more than life. Its so satisfying. #needtogetoutmore
• It’s pretty cruel to write anything in Excel, ouch.Problem is when someone sets it up,they rarely have to fill it in
• Arghh REPORTS!!! Eyeballs deep in #Excel… I hope this means I’m a little bit closer to getting the coveted ninja badge!
• #Excel can either be your best friend or your worst nightmare… Someone wake me up from this nightmare…
• Hotel room with Four Loko. Eat Pray Love on TV with James Franco. And Excel spreadsheets. I’m a catch!
• =IF(AND(groom="chad",bride="alise"),"LOVE! :-)","Not love 🙁 ") …Little excel humor for ya this mornin’. 10 DAYS!!!

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Functions
• Excel VBA

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  Paisley patterns, brain explosions, and dorky thoughts – all the ingredients for a spreadsheet of love!

• Haha, now using pivot tables in Excel to answer: ‘Are the Yankees really evil?’ We don’t need computers to know that… 🙂 #kipcamp
• Holy crap on a cracker. I am almost done with this EPIC SPREADSHEET. My shoulders hurt. My eyes hurt. My wrists hurt. Can I push on? HALP.
• Saving my work periodically, now, thanks to the power outage trauma of yesterday. *curses spreadsheet*
• I love when MS Excel’s help has a function example that doesn’t work in Excel.
• Excel’s love for changing things I’ve typed into dates is REALLY annoying.
• Apparently I’m an Excel genius at work… I’m not… I just know how to make pretty shapes & colours & hyperlink!!
• When your whole #Excel spreadsheet consists of inter-linked pivot-tables, it’s a sign you need to move your model to #Access.
• This morning, I’m teaching a Program Manager how to use Pivot Tables in Excel. I need to write some code before my brain explodes.
• bosses + computers = bad mix. My boss just asked me why he couldn’t see the entirety of a long number in a small cell in Excel…
• I hate the only thing stopping me from making massive spreadsheets of anything really interesting is my lazyness 🙁
• Freelance client just sent me excel sheet called, no joke, "spreadsheet of love."
• I love excel but I have to figure out a way to print this spreadsheet larger…where’s my magnifying glass?!?!
• I’d feel a lot better if I could pretend these numbers are just abstract shapes, like colouring in the spreadsheet with Paisley patterns
• You made a spreadsheet? // "Yeah, isn’t that what you always do when you have a problem?" 🙂
• Glass of wine (check), pjs (check), excel spreadsheet & @radian6 open (check), aptitude to stare at large amounts of data #priceless
• i have come up with so many equations on this stupid excel sheet i dont even know what im doing anymore…
• Dorky thought of the day: an Excel spreadsheet is probably way more advanced than the world of Tron, right?
• Another day when I wish I was an excel spreadsheet pro. Ugh. Must put that on the to-learn list. Oh, and must create to-learn list.

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Related Links:

• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Tips and Tutorials
• Excel Functions

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Mumbling and swearing about Excel? That sounds like every time of the year, not just a specific month! You could turn up the Aerosmith, to drown it out.

• Ooo it’s that time of the year where Kayleigh can be found mumbling and swearing about Excel whilst surrounded by reams of paper <3
• Queries, formulas, & toggling excel spreadsheets. Yaay, back to work.
• at last……..the spreadsheet is finished, well when I say finished, it’s all entered on it…….probably loads more to do but not today
• Yo followers. Are any of you any good with Excel? I need help and will give you my eternal love if you can help me!
• Talking to my boss about Microsoft Excel is like talking to a baby about astrophysics. POINTLESS.
• so I’m totally at a loss on how to modify this excel spreadsheet… it just looks like a bunch of random numbers…
• I’m not sure what the avg bride includes in their budget, but I just updated my excel spreadsheet w/ EVERYTHING and it was kind of ridic.
• #PowerPivot is OLAP tech re-skinned as #Excel. "Spreadmarts" by contrast are often the reverse. Guess which one works better? 🙂
• Oh goody.. one of my important #PowerPivot files is crashing #Excel every time I open it…
• This spreadsheet is draining me
• My boss asked for me to keep him in the loop so I sent him an Excel spreadsheet with a circular reference error.
• You’re trying to plan it all on an Excel spreadsheet and I’m sorry, Erin, but life doesn’t work like that. #mymomknowsme #plannerfail
• I liked Pages, so I bought Numbers for Mac. Damn thing is being stupid with leading zeros in zip codes. Don’t make me get Excel in here.
• How am I supposed to concentrate on my spreadsheet when #aerosmith #sweetemotion is playing? Such a great riff!
• you know you’re a nerd when all you can think about is how sexy your excel spreadsheet looks
• I AM doing my work, thank you very much, FOOL! 🙂 It’s only Excel and it’s easy 🙂
• Doing work and listening to grime isn’t a brilliant idea. I’m hyping up and ruining my excel formulas
• I think Microsoft put Pivot Tables into Excel for the sole purpose of making my life difficult.

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Related Links:

• Excel Templates
• Excel Functions
• PowerPivot for Excel 2010

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Did you enjoy a beautiful, sunny weekend, far away from Excel spreadsheets? Some of us weren’t so lucky, but a glass of wine at the end of the day can help.

• Excel shouldn’t be allowed to work on sunny days #spreadsheetshavetakenovermylife
• Saturday night is meant to involve me being recklessly drunk but instead I’m sat at home on excel trying to do some stupid tables!
• And here we are 25 yrs later & people are still ‘wowed’ by pivot tables & analysis in excel – jeez I was doing this in the 80s on my 286 PC
• the ipad still lacks an office suite. Useless in my business w/o excel spreadsheet
• a pivot table! Instant answer!
• I am not very good at Excel. I do have charts where my cells should be and formulas where my axis should be. Numbers are not my bag. #fact
• New pet peeve: people who use Excel for Word-type documents. Also people who leave stupidly huge amounts of blank space at the end of files.
• Oh, Excel 2007. I love you. Your AutoSum function has literally saved me hours of work. I think I just spontaneously made a baby.
• My boss gave me a CD to learn more about Excel 2007, do more forcasting, etc. About as fun as watching paint dry!
• Watching Bad Boys 2, I wish they could have that slo-mo camera work for me when I’m rockin Excel pivottables
• bored so came into office for 3 hours. Stereo Love, excel, and Bloomberg. what a sunday
• Been for a run-nearly time for comfy pants, no bra & glass of wine – bliss! First to tackle an excel spreadsheet …
• The score from Inception just played on my Pandora radio station. It’s not possible for Excel spreadsheet work to feel more epic than this!
• DAX formulas cannot be evaluated in parts like Excel formulas can. Makes it difficult to troubleshoot formulas that should work but don’t.
• Bible group at next table discusses "tracking the heavenly father’s good works in a Google spreadsheet that’s stored *in the cloud*"
• given up getting #excel to make me standard error bars. I will just draw the graphs with a pencil #oldschool

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• PowerPivot for Excel 2010

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Much of my best Excel work is done in a sleep deprived, hunger induced state of madness. Maybe I’ll stare at relaxed cats on the Internet, and call it a night.

• a guy who sits across the aisle from me had a problem with excel loading an add-in. IT replaced his computer. #coworkers
• I just instructed someone to colour an excel spreadsheet cell yellow. My work here is done! #fb
• took me over 5 mins to find where they put the pivot table button in Excel. I resorted to 2003 keystrokes.Then I RTFM.
• Just solved an Excel problem that’s been bugging me all day. Now to go install a sink and call it a night.
• is anyone awake and better yet is anyone awake that can make me a simple excel spreadsheet i am losing at excel
• I will never look down on spreadsheet wranglers again, omg. My mum already gave me a healthy appreciation for them, but this work! *faints*
• I’m wearing my excel book as a hat because I can’t figure out arrays. Boss asked if I hope to soak in the info that way. LOL
• Speaking of my birthday present, anybody know how to turn worksheet data into a pie graph in excel?
• It is possible to search an entire workbook in Excel instead of just one sheet. Just FYI.
• Sleep deprived, tendonitis flared, hunger induced madness & I’m learning how to create pivot tables in excel..
• Spreadsheet formulas are, I think, a very rocky introduction into functional programming. What I would give for a "for" loop right now…
• I have no faith in Excel’s colour-based filtering. Plus, you can’t make pivot tables based on row colour. #darkart
• Nice to be able to include the phrase "DON’T UNHIDE THE ROWS ABOVE THIS LINE! YOU’LL KILL US ALL YOU MANIAC!" in an Excel spreadsheet.
• After years of printing each worksheet individually, I just discovered you can print an entire workbook at once in Excel.
• Working on an important spreadsheet – The office McDonalds Happy Meal orders!
• the girl i work with said that she gets excited about excel like i get about facebook. Difference: facebook is changing lives…
• #facepalm I spent days looking for a document I made but couldn’t remember where. Just located it on a different page of open Excel workbook
• Creating a spreadsheet has stressed me out so much that I have been forced to look at pictures of a relaxed cats on the Internet to destress

___________

Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Special Sort

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No April Fools in Excel – everyone who uses Excel is a superior person, who makes wrangling lots of data look easy! Just ignore that person curled up in the corner, gently rocking.

• Transcribing names from a sign-in sheet to a spreadsheet…people have unbelievably messy handwriting!!
• I’m at that time at work where quickbooks, peachtree, excel sheets, and client’s statements blend together into one big blob
• I’m looking for a Superior person, with a capital "S", that knows how to make charts in Excel look fantastic. Anyone?
• Being able to build a pivot table on your own can get ya a job folks
• All data can be arranged into an excel spreadsheet. That’s an axiom right there.
• An excel spreadsheet just stole 4 hours of my life… I need a book keeper.
• I would like to express my gratitude that the "recover" function worked in excel, recovering two hours of spreadsheet work. thank you.
• No way in hell I’m waking up for class at 8. I hate Excel anyways
• Hard rock, a cup of tea and a pivot table…this is living!
• yuck!! I feel the same over this darn spreadsheet I am trying to create in which every1 wants something different
• I just love Excel… is that weird? I have just recently discovered Named Ranges! I used to use the default cell references!… took forever
• I usually start Excel work by going "WOAH! This is so clever!" and end up rocking gently a corner, once again defeated by a pivot table.
• Also, Excel Pivot tables are amazing. Makes wrangling lots of data look easy.
• A mere 25 years into its existence, Microsoft Excel still plots undefined numbers same as 0. Maybe they’ll fix that in coming decade or two.
• In #sql training, I was just referred to as the ‘Pivot King’ due to my knowledge of #excel pivot tables. #intenselygeeky
• I think I’ve just created the most intense spreadsheet/Google Doc in the history of Excel-formatted things #organizationFTW
• 🙁 sorry just got on….glad your daily battle with Excel was a victorious one
• just figured out how you can calculate howmany days someone is old in excel… #marilynmanson is 15425 days old! love this cursus!

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Contextures Excel Tips and Tutorials

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Wouldn’t it be great to have a single gadget that could run Excel, make toast and iron dress pants? Mornings would be so much easier!

• Learned to make pie charts in Excel and iron dress pants
• Taken me 5+ mins to find out how to remove a ‘password to modify’ from an Excel 2010 spreadsheet – MS, stop bloody moving options about!
• I just spent 30 minutes of my life discussing a non-work-related/vacation planning Excel spreadsheet w/ a friend. #fml #fb
• It should seriously be against the law to make someone stare at an excel spreadsheet for over 10 hours.
• Permission to leave? *hurls stupid laptop with stupid excel document across stupid floor of stupid place of stupid work*
• Dear Excel, I’m sorry that my 32GB of RAM is not enough for you, but still it would be great if you would stop choking on my spreadsheet.
• Sometimes when you think you’re saving the world, you realize you made an error in the numbers and you’re just polluting an excel workbook.
• I think programmers tend to prefer "R1C1" reference style in Excel.
• Buried in an excel spreadsheet for the afternoon. Head is melted. Tonight… there will be wine!
• I made a pivot table in excel last week. I still can’t come to grips with that
• You haven’t seen a pivot table until you’ve seen mine. #pivotenvy
• in advanced excel class, we learned to hide columns. #fail
• Seriously Microsoft start treating an Excel workbook as a single file. I don’t want to have to manually set every single sheet for printing.
• The massive excel spreadsheet project is now complete. Unfortunately my efforts weren’t rewarded with a new iPad. 🙁
• trust me. I didn’t overlook anything. I have a 5 tab excel workbook to prove it
• It’s a slippery slope! but then my wife used her excel/spreadsheet foo to track out cats glucose curve, then we shared it w/vet
• The most work I’ve done so far this morning has been to show two of the older guys in the office how to insert a picture in excel. #slowday
• Missing the most anticipated cricket match in history, to spend the day with Excel and LaTex 🙁 #FML #IndvsPak
• As it turns out the problem was that an update for excel turned on a long forgotten and well-hidden option without notice… frakin toasters

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Related Links:

• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel VLOOKUP Function
• Excel Functions

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Times might be tough, but you really should be working for food! Brush up on your Excel skills, and get a better job.

• Just traded my boss an excel report for string cheese and an apple. Everything I ever needed to know, I learned in kindergarten. #mature
• When your boss ask you to gather information and update the excel sheet simply say …Do I look like a people person?
• I just had to show the boss at work how ctrl+f works in excel. He got really excited. #highereducationatwork
• Excel knows who the boss is today like. Just wrote a Macro. HA.
• If it was not for boss we would have had an Excel Sheet that would have defied all the Presentations ever made in this office.
• Y this pivot table with this info so hard to put together on excel….dang man….I need a break
• Interview went well actually. But kudos to me for not knowing how to use vlookup and pivot table on excel. Sheesh
• note to self: selecting an entire workbook and mistakenly copying and pasting links elsewhere is enough to make excel implode
• Awesome, I’ve never wasted time making an Excel workbook that performs a Kaprekar Routine before. #cubefarm #morewaystopass4months
• I love you, Excel. I have missed you.
• Had to put marking on hold to brush up on my Excel skills tonight and being the nerd I am, I love it!!
• Dear users, if you’re going to send me a screenshot of an error….for the love of god, dont send it as an excel spredsheet. #ihateusers
• Microsoft Excel – I love you. Why can’t all MS Office products be as robust and reliable as you? You’re like the swiss army knife of data.<3
• I absolutely love that excel has a button that makes things normal. Sounds silly but SOOO helpful!!!
• Just figured out some really complicated (well, complicated for me) stuff in Excel. I love when I learn new things 🙂 #RealLifeAchievement
• I love when I send someone an excel spreadsheet, they make changes to it, and then cut and paste the data into an email. /headdesk
• jealous, I got this little laptop monitor…and I work with multiple excel large spreadsheets. #hopingfordualmonitorssoon
• Apparently “Save often” for Microsoft Excel means every 20 seconds. Just lost work and it reverted to a previous auto-save. #NotCool
• Ask me how I can work on a website design, but can’t create a table in #microsoft word or excel.

___________

Related Links:

• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel VLOOKUP Function
• Excel Functions

______________

Good question – what is your definition of an Excel ninja? The ability to turn spreadsheets lilac? Doing inventory work while drinking beer?

• Spending a day in excel doing inventory work for clients isn’t that bad when you’re sitting in the sun with a beer! #mondayjoy
• i swear. since when does 11-20 automatically mean 1st of november 2020. and why the hell would i be making a spreadsheet about the future!?
• In Excel, you can’t unhide multiple worksheets at once. That’s dumb.
• Laundry & excel spreadsheets….my life is so glamorous. #sarcasm
• Microsoft Excel you are the bane of my existence! A pivot table seemed like a good idea at the time…
• In honor of me figuring out this Excel Pivot table I will do a line of fries from mcdonalds.
• I really admire someone that applies their love of comic sans to excel files.
• I am falling out with excel at a rapid speed. My spreadsheet has turned lilac. #clientslovelilac right?!?
• More than a little annoyed that days of work will go to waste because Excel is stupid. (R has a ridiculous learning curve – will work on it)
• I’m entering important tweets in an excel spreadsheet to keep track, including troll tweets. Historians will pay a fortune for it 🙂
• Typed in following search on Bing site:linkedin.com "excel ninja" -dir what is ur def of excel ninja? Pivot tables, macros, vba programming?
• At work. Stupid reports. My battle with Excel and predicting when it will crashes begins. Bets anyone? Times?
• Just got emailed an 8 page Excel spreadsheet for the wedding I’m in. DANG.
• Excel, why do you think there are a MILLION rows of data here when there are clearly only 10? Don’t make me hate you. #work
• What kind of Corp Rep project doesn’t require you to submit an excel sheet? This is a joke, seriously.
• I was not born for spreadsheet hell, I know that much #excel
• I’m playing VAT Reconciliation Warrior 12: The Pivot Table. I’m a level 23 accounting warlock in the Excel Circle.
• I still haven’t finished this stupid excel workbook. Mainly because it’s stupid and I’m uninterested in it.

___________

Related Links:

• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel VBA
• Excel Tips and Tutorials

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Even though I’m working with Excel again, I know it’s not Groundhog Day. And don’t call me Shirley!

• I’m the dreamer/opportunist, he’s the "let-me-do-the-excel-sheet-to-see-if-it’ll-work". It balances out.
• *smackhead* Stupid mistake in Excel formulas. Now have to redo like a thousand formulas. #hategradschool
• JUst made an F1 points spreadsheet. Like the ones me and dad used to make back in the day on our first computer. #Nostalgia
• Should I open the excel model from work in the hope that it’ll put me to sleep?
• Numbers is for quick+presentation use, Excel is a full suite spreadsheet (which most of us never fully use)
• please explain to my boss that I’m too drunk/hungover to use #vlookup or any other excel function today.
• i would rather do just about anything than make an excel spreadsheet… #guesswhatimdoing
• Shirley I’m not the only one "working" with my mouse over a fake spreadsheet! #BUTLER
• Friday night. On the couch. watching basketball. Work spreadsheet in front of me. Canceled a date #fml
• was an online test. Only got hung up on the Excel part. Damn pivot tables.
• I don’t know where to start explaining to a client what’s wrong about keeping a spreadsheet with the username and passwords of their users.
• I’m in accounting too!! I have mad Excel skills & love balanced numbers! And also get mocked for it #AccountantsRock
• i met the deadline. 4398 balanced rows(excel). The boss is overall happy. i #rule 😀
• Excel & I are at that point in our love/hate relationship where I push it out of an airplane from 35,000 feat and it plummets to its death.
• I opened my laptop to work on excel I’m tweeting instead
• no problem…glad to share my arcane (and usually pointless) knowledge of excel 🙂
• Groundhog Day. Spreadsheet. Soul. Wilting.
• I am hating my class again. ARGH – 4 words, small team – BIG spreadsheet
• Entering check information into a spreadsheet, and noticed someone wrote a check for $190 as "one hundred and nighty".

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Related Links:

• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel VLOOKUP Function
• Excel Functions

______________

Whether you’re in fashion school or helping grandma, Excel can help. And if you forget how to calculate percentages, a pie chart might not be the best long term solution.

• Got the most confusing spreadsheet from customer wanting me to fill it in, but it was sent as read-only. Someone needs an Excel class…
• Watching Modern Family while I work helps me ignore that Excel is taking 4ever to save (I’m a compulsive saver, so this is a BIG problem)
• This spreadsheet is as good as its going to get… good night Excel. Good night events list. Good night Twitter. Good night moon.
• The weirdest things get me excited now….I’m totally geeked about this new excel spreadsheet #dork
• It’s a rare day that I get an e-mail with a screenshot of an Excel sheet and I’m asked to calculations on it, but today is that day. #fml
• Realized that making reports, charts and pivots in Excel is a new hobby of mine..Should I be worried right now?
• I get it from my dad. We are supreme spreadsheet lovers! He would be so proud if he saw mine..err..maybe not… 😉
• I love Excel but there is a line and think you just crossed it with your Scabble score spreadsheet 🙂
• I am so lame. I just my a pivot table for my #wedding flowers. I officially just became an #ExcelGeek…and I think I like it!
• Thank God for that business computer class, just helped my grandma with this excel spreadsheet.
• Ummm… I’ve forgotten the excel formula for working out percentages… But it’s okay because the pie charts worked it out for me. #phew
• Dear Universe, just ONE more excel file to complete, please allow me to survive..(a months work in 3 days…)
• Kid at the office just sent document to me (I asked him to put date in the name): spreadsheet twenty fifth march two thousand and eleven.doc
• I even like formulas. I would marry a spreadsheet.
• Pivot Tables. The most useful, yet most unstable and frustrating part of Microsoft Excel
• I love filling out spreadsheets for stuff that doesn’t matter. Even better if a secret society of Excel engineers designed the spreadsheet!
• Fashion schools should put an emphasis on Microsoft Excel. I make at least 4 charts everyday.
• Work work work. I would like to know when did excel become a means of torture?

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Functions

______________

If Excel work is making you depressed, take a break, and jot down a few new ideas. Or maybe Satan could teach you to play the blues.

• Tonight, when I get home, I am going to write a love song about Microsoft Excel.
• What’s not to love when you solve problems of the dreaded excel variety
• I’m in computer class, we doing spreadsheet, I really can’t believe that so many people can’t do basic things on pc’s, shockn #imjustsaying
• Love that my dad classifies me as a genius because of my basic excel know-how. 🙂
• Excel never ceases to amaze me how much it can be used in so many different ways #excelrocks
• Dear Satan, teaching Robert Johnson the blues at the crossroads was an inspired move. But, it still doesn’t make up for Microsoft Excel.
• Revamping someone elses XL spreadsheet is the worst!! My eyes are glazed.
• #Excel is right next to #Twitter on my dock and i keep opening excel and it depresses me deeply.
• Fixed the #Excel macros that were shutting down my computer yesterday. 20 min work each month is now a single mouse click. #winning
• I really should keep it quiet that I know how to use Excel. People find out and the requests pile up asking about metrics, charts, etc
• Used an #Excel #PivotTable to turn an entire day’s worth of my co-worker’s job into about 10 minutes of work. #Seriously
• Today, at work, I was told that I’m at Jedi Master level when it comes to my Excel skills. #howtomakeageekhappy #ilovespreadsheets #starwars
• You know you’re a consultant when… you use Excel for your shopping list and then sort it using a pivot table!
• after complaining, the excel gods were nice to me and the pivot table stopped being stubborn – all is well – chocolate overdose avoided
• Take a break from excel, and doodle down a few new ideas.
• Tech Tip –> don’t run a macro on a 65k-row excel workbook, if you want to do anything else in Excel for the next freaking hour!! #FB
• Take a screenshot of a spreadsheet. Set it as your desktop wallpaper. Look productive at all times.
• Well I wanted/needed to do some work tonight but I think my roomie just bored me into a coma with an Excel conversation. Accountants…

___________

Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Templates

______________

It was the opposite of a sunny day here yesterday, so there was no temptation to stop working in Excel and go outside.

• Ok. Folks. Can someone tell me if YIELD in excel takes in the dirty price or the clean price?
• I never thought I’d say this but Excel’s help function just helped me big time… 😀
• Hip deep in data validation rules. Excel how I love thee. Let me count the ways…..it’s 2
• Just took a Mean Nap, Time to knock out this Excel work!
• Lovely sunny day outside & I’m in work battling with date formats in Excel!:-( #miffed
• An excel book should do it. Problem is having time and patience to make excel do what you want.
• Man I love a spread sheet, marmite is good but excel is by far my favourite spread!
• Love it when I work something out for myself on Excel 🙂 #pivottablesfordummies
• I’m having a blast at work learning new things about Excel… Oh how I love Excel. Also, I get to leave soon.
• #Excel and I are just about to fall out. Nice to > 256 columns, but would also like not to have the accompanying memory issues… Grrrr!
• Just overheard a debate on which Excel formula was best #fail
• Text to columns is a beautiful, time-saving thing. #Excel
• Has worked out ‘Auto sum’ in excel and got it to work out my weekly and fought nightly driving times!
• Can’t. Get. Pivot. Table. To. Sort. What am I doing wrong?! I need to buy an Excel book today. Good thing I’m working at sbx next to mall
• It’s time for the Excel fairy to stop by and do my work for me.
• Numbers will match. It’s after all MS Excel. Add some charts to look professional and create confusion. #OfficePolitics #ThumbRules
• I now dream exclusively in Excel/VBA code. #engineering #nightmares #nerdybrag #excessiveuseofhashtags
• is it weird that i kind of like making ridiculously organized spreadsheets on #excel ? #nerdalert #ocd
• being good with excel, like being a good with a banjo, earns respect from practitioners but annoyance from everyone else.

___________

Related Links:

• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Functions
• Excel Data Validation

______________

Things can turn ugly when Excel processes go rogue, and Excel demons appear. A pivot table wizard or flux capacitor might solve the problem.

• Excel is suddenly crashing every time I try to save a workbook. Did Adobe buy Microsoft this morning and I missed it?
• ALTHOUGH it used to be easier in earlier versions of Excel, where there was Pivot Table Wizard. New office, notsomuch.
• Post on a Warcraft forum called "why I love Excel." This is pretty much as good as it gets for me
• Just opened my budget spreadsheet to find it somehow didn’t save all the work I did on it last time… *sob* stupid Excel!!!
• Batlling the demons of excel and #winning
• I finally got upgraded to Office 2010 last week and I’m having a love affair with the new Excel. This is what my life has come to.
• Late night playing with #excel functions, SEARCH > FIND, any objections? 🙂
• Such crap at work today. Seriously, if you can’t enter info in an Excel worksheet its time for you to be shown the door.
• Please sponsor my excel marathon, taking place today, at work, all day…
• I hate using Excel for data updates and charts figures. This stuff is takes forever. #overit
• Seeing my magical powers with the Excel pivot table, the social workers were awestruck, as though I had invented fire.
• Boss is banning me from joining Excel training. What?! Is it due to my job as superbackup holds me back? Or I’m just too awesome? Can I cry?
• making bubble charts on Excel is a nightmare. They always look horrible. Any other tools that people use ?
• I HATE this day…urgent needed Excel file’s missing…8 hrs of work for nothing…*argh* just great…
• Turns out #excel didn’t lose my personal.xlsb, there was a rouge excel process holding it captive.
• 14 – I love Excel enough that I’m about to switch this list over to there to help me get organized. #100factsaboutme
• Learn some basic formatting skills! I’ve just spent 10 minutes resizing your spreadsheet columns to make it legible.
• Vlookup pivot table flux capacitor transwarp ratio differential. All functions of Excel I claimed to have used today at work. #blagging

___________

Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Functions

______________

I hope your day in Excel didn’t leave you feeling pivot brained and body slammed! That could result in your talking like a pirate.

• Instead of playing pokemon I am instead making an excel worksheet. Does this mean I’m an adult now?
• This may come as a shock to you, but staring at the #Excel spreadsheet does not make it populate with data. I tried this tactic. It failed.
• Recieved a great compliment last week. "You spend too much time on #Excel". I found it amusing.
• I really love the new colours in Microsoft Excel 2010 – Spreadsheets never looked so good! #massivenerd
• excel pivot tables are great… unless you know how to code reports out of mysql
• been putting off work for 3 hours playing with excel -_-
• Have been so buried in excel today my brain feels like a pivot table
• after careful consideration I have come to the conclusion that I would rather be playing Golf instead of working this spreadsheet!
• Whoever came up w/ #excel and #spreadsheets needs to be body slammed by the Aussie bully body slammer. That guy is cool, Excel guy is not
• AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH #excel #id10ts
• ridiculous… i can stumble upon pricelessly useful formulas in excel, but i cant find the effing page setup button to save my life. #fml
• I LOVE YOU, SUMPRODUCT!!! #Excel
• I’m sorry #Excel, but after discovering joys (?) of #Numbers, I bid you adieu. #funwithspreadsheets
• Today my Excel-Fu has been… Strong!
• I don’t know why I am fascinated by complex excel spread sheets. #NerdAttack
• I was just reading an article about how to Excel at work. My mind kept thinking, what does this have to do with spreadsheets. It didn’t.
• my excel crashed just like that, couldn’t repair, couldn’t save. Whole day’s worth of work is gone.
• I made my own pivot table in excel. I’m almost an IT guy – overheard in the office.
• It takes time to adjust to Excel 2010’s easy manner. Feels like cheating to just type custom Y axis labels into the chart. #excel

___________

Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Golf Scores Template

______________

People must have worked with Excel formulas all weekend, because there were several tweets about brackets. There was probably lots of pivoting too.

• Oh my DAYS I am obscenely happy with this color coded production schedule I just made in #excel – it’s almost TOO sexy for safe consumption.
• In VBA used "Dim i,j as Long" for years, assuming i & j to be type Long; turns out j is Long but i is Variant #yalearnsomethingneweveryday
• Living the nerd life…at a diner watching live spreadsheet!
• I’m trying to get the in-game variables in, but I can’t keep up. Seriously, my spreadsheet said IL and I went, no UNLV will win.
• ya know…i was 4th in the state for excel spreadsheet. i got a 100% but took the longest.
• In response to "why do we need to do that in Excel?" I sent my boss my blog post on Excel. That, my friends, is #winning.
• My friend calling me to go out tonight.. my condition … excel assistance LOL
• I used Excel at work, the class helped me at work a lot, until the manager told me to stop being good and do it their way!
• What’s worse boring ole work or the fact I’m doing my super boring excel hw at boring work. It’s boring squared.
• Ok, is it just me or does anyone else dislike color in Excel spreadsheets? Not charts. You’re not colorcoding data but making my eyes hurt
• I need to talk to someone who is really smart and good at making charts in excel
• "I see you have constructed a Pivot Table. Your Excel skills are complete. Indeed you are powerful as the emperor has foreseen" #sorry
• How do you make a bunch of excel sheets go into one workbook. My wife asks this.. I asked what’s excel? Anyone help us?
• Oh. That one got broken. Sorry. It fell off the pivot table.
• Why must people with the internet at their finger tips insist on emailing me stupid questions like "how to I wrap text in excel?"
• It’s a 27" monitor. I can’t see my entire Excel document without having to scroll. There has to be a better way. I’m too stupid to find it.
• Eeee my boss gave me a page of formulas and said "go make it work on Excel" and I did I did! 8D
• Doing data aggregation without Excel Pivot tables would be a nightmare.
• #Excel can be your worst enemy if you are on the #IT Dept

___________

Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel VBA

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Is Excel heaven filled with spreadsheets of doom? Should we blame Microsoft? Ah, it’s the weekend — you can worry about that on Monday.

• Instead of working I’m playing with Excel pivot charts. Which is still technically working, but not a priority so I am kind of slacking.
• Just been called into the training room to solve a problem with Excel. On an excel training course.
• App work gone down well with my client but the real star is the data. I’m in love with Excel spreadsheets.
• Time to face the terrible spreadsheet of doom once more and try to discover why my calculations are off by 40 grand! #woo
• Finally created my own custom Function in #Excel. Gotta love some old school #VBA code.
• I’ve got spreadsheet eye. It’s like tennis elbow for people who work in accounts!
• Excel has given me the names of 10 students to work with. If it doesn’t work out we can blame Microsoft.
• Nested IF statements. Just what I want on a Friday! #Excel #NotOnAFriday
• I have that problem here. Apparently, I’m the ‘Excel Guru’. When I leave they’ll grind to a halt and possibly go out of business
• just finished listening to "Palace" at work. It’s like I’m at #sxsw but with a desk, office supplies, and an Excel spreadsheet.
• Wow, who knew spreadsheet tweets would be so popular? Would you all like to hear about my pivot table woes now? 😉
• Spent a whole day trying to encourage a sophisticated stats package to do something which I found out can be done in seconds by #Excel!
• The IF function in Excel is currently the bane of my existence
• update: my beautiful spreadsheet i tweeted about earlier has gone to excel heaven after a minor forgetting to save hiccup. i could cry
• Dear #excel. I am sorry for every mean thing I’ve ever said about you. You are a lovely spreadsheet program.
• I’ve tried and tried and even cried at how frustrated Excel makes meTold the boss I won’t be touching any spreadsheets
• I can write code to turn the blender on from my computer, but some Excel problems KILL me.
• Me: "I love conditional formatting in Excel" Manager: "Get a life"
• For as powerful as Excel can be, it sure has some insanely stupid limitations.

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel VBA

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Did you get punked by Excel today? Is the Ribbon making you crazy? Or are you loving Excel…pour le moment?

• Sometimes I get bribes like this at work via email – Subject: can u help me again with excel? we have beer come over #work
• J’ai trouvé !! #Excel je t’aime !!!!!!! … Pour le moment …
• Why do people when putting colour on an Excel sheet insist on using stupid colours? I feel like I’m on an acid trip
• Can we talk about my profoundly disturbing love for the vlookup function in excel?
• I am slowly starting to learn all the Excel keyboard shortcuts. Had to relearn because of the stupid Ribbon.
• one sign of the US educational system’s failure: i spent 16+ years in it and still can’t print an excel spreadsheet. #thishandbasketiscomfy
• Every time I create a pivot table in MS Excel I always change the view back to classic. I’m just curious who uses the new view & why?!?
• It’s a Microsoft #Excel kind of day. Not happy about that. #PR
• If I had a dollar for every time I bitched about Excel, I’d be a freaking billionaire in no time. Stupid, stupid program.
• My new boss just said I did a great job with this excel file. That’s the first time she’s said anything kinda nice. #yaymi
• Why does Microsoft Excel let you Paste via Transpose from Copy but not from Cut?? Stupid thing!
• Boss & I having a crazy time using the 2007 excel,trying to figure out where all functions are. But once we found em,we’re blown away! Sad.
• Excel spreadsheet error. It asks, "Do you want help with this?" So I click Yes, and it says "No help available." I just got punked by Excel!
• I wonder if Sonic Youth knew they were making the perfect album for editing a spreadsheet when they made Dirty.
• I have to strategically place my streaming windows for the next two days. Then have a spreadsheet readily available to pop up for "work"
• On train to work. Girl has her laptop with excel on it and a big manual calculator doing sums. #fail. Also looks confused by her blackberry.
• In GA, I did a Excel spreadsheet with summary in front of hardware and each tab was a floor. Boss screwed it up.
• Today’s biggest accomplishment: A much-dreaded spreadsheet (non-work) I’ve avoided doing for one month. Only took 45 min tonight. #typical

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Related Links:

• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel VLOOKUP Function
• Excel Keyboard Shortcuts 

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Save your Excel work as you go along — that should reduce the amount of crying, even when you’re helping the boss.

• No matter what Microsoft critics have to say, Excel has got to be open of the greatest software applications ever written. #microsoft #excel
• Fine then, Excel. I will use a pivot table, but let’s get this clear; I won’t like it.
• Hour’s work lost on Excel. When will I ever learn to save as I go along. 🙁
• Sometimes you just need to start the day with"busy work". Just to give your brain (and nerves) a breather. Yes excel worksheet I mean you.
• There was a time in my life when I was called a genius for adding up figures on an excel sheet. Now I work with people cleverer than me.
• Ooook I’m not gonna even get involved with this excel thing right now cuz I’m hungry. Food 1st work l8r
• So I was gonna leave an hour ago, till my boss called me asking for 5 mins to show him excel. An hour later…. #FML #livetowork #telstra
• Boss is gone on errands, big meeting finished for the day. I should have brought my pajamas for this last 1.5 hours of excel database work!
• My boss called a meeting so that we could sit here and watch him copy text from a powerpoint to an excel doc. #failboss
• Omg.I’m never gonna help euriel with his excel sheets anymore. I pretty much did all his work & he got a higher grade then me. I’m mad !
• My boss just learned how to sort and search within Excel. #welcometothe20thcentury #smh
• You know you have a problem with excel when your spreadsheet is 76,847 rows long, but at least sample size won’t be a problem… #NERD
• Our simile of the day, courtesy of the Microsoft trainer: "A pivot table is like turning a mob into a marching band."
• Dear Excel, I love all the things you can do but I don’t like writing you IF statements
• why didn’t any1 tell me ab excel’s pivot table function! U ppl hv been holding out on me.
• buried underneath a pile of excel spreadsheets, direct deposit forms, and workers’ comp claims. i love being busy at work.
• woo .. 375000 rows of Adventure Works goodness in my Excel workbook #PowerPivot
• Fine. Don’t come crying to me when you gotta do an Excel spreadsheet. #ImaPC
• Just explained text wrapping and overwriting vs inserting text in Excel to my frustrated, confused boss. #jobsecurity

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Related Links:

• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Functions
• PowerPivot from Identical Files

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Watching the Sharks probably affects your blood pressure, so keep track in Excel, and report the results to your doctor.

• i’m succeeding in my mission to do as little work as possible today. its almost 11am and i haven’t finished a single excel sheet yet.
• I’m having way too much fun playing with charts in Excel. It’s for work, I swear!
• Dang, I wish I was watching the Sharks game right now instead of looking at stupid excel spreadsheets.
• I really, really love using MS Excel. I wish I know more "tricks" than merging cells and coloring them. XD
• Waiting for Excel. Massive vlookup is slow. Gonna be a while. #excel #haiku
• dude, that’s what I love about you. You are the only person I know w/ a favorite excel function. That’s awesomeness.
• I find it a shame that some of my finest work is in spreadsheet form and no-one wants to see it. Ah well.
• We’re not sure what the "look out" & "on alert" excel spreadsheet means.
• Someone just sent me their CV as an excel spread sheet. In the name of all that is holy tell me stupid is not contagious…
• The doctor loved my blood pressure Excel charts. I’m such an engineer.
• $1 to anyone who can tell me how to disable that stupid edge-double-click-jump-to-end-of-column "feature" in Excel. Also I hate Excel.
• I hate Excel -.- dealing with 2007 for work, too many stupid things about it!
• Trying to plan my birthday party. Yeah, I made an excel spreadsheet and everything.
• Today I love the person responsible fr creating #Microsoft #Excel 😀 Work simplied 🙂
• I seem to have lost my way and fallen into Excel Spreadsheet hell! CTRL + A and Delete ?
• You know, I still think "ribbons" are stupid, but I like New Excel. (Which has apparently been out for 4 yrs, but I’ve had it for 3 months.)
• Just put together an Excel Spreadsheet in a moving vehicle. Thank you, Verizon Wireless, for having my back in times of crisis. #BeastMode

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel VLOOKUP Function
• Excel Keyboard Shortcuts 

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Based on these tweets posted yesterday, it must have been a Monday. What other day of the week has wrestling matches, creepy messages and Apocalypse Now?

• If I don’t say so myself, this spreadsheet full of projections just might make sense.
• really creeps me out when #excel asks you to save changes to spreadsheet you havn’t actually modified
• My boss is asking me how to make changes in an Excel doc. Plz just send it to me so I can do it myself!
• Gearing up for my wrestling match with a v complicated excel spreadsheet in the morning.
• Just opened a screenshot of an email pasted in a word doc embedded within an excel sheet. #nojoke #badpractices #fml
• Spreadsheet creativity is something I excel in.
• Not that it happened to me yesterday… But who knew excel couldn’t handle 4 pivot tables summarizing 140000 rows of data.
• I could go into more detail about my love of lists – Excel spreadsheets etc – but I’d worry I might come across imbalanced.
• i’m about to label the tabs on my excel workbook and create my cover page for my paper. that’s all i’m doing right now. i’m tired.
• Microsoft marketing have had a huge coup. the Spanish day-to-day word for a spreadsheet is "un Excel"
• I chilled enough today… time to open up Excel and get some work done.
• Because, to me, anything involving Excel spreadsheets is work … not fun!! But that’s just me.
• I made a housemate-proof spreadsheet on the weekend for keeping tabs on grocery money.
• My journey into pivot table hell is basically the same story as Apocalypse Now except A3 print outs have replaced terminating Kurtz.
• done and done. that took all bloody day to do those additions and excel spreadsheet. gonna save an average of 20 minutes a day tho!
• Enough charts on there? You just get Excel and figure out how to use it?
• The "Transpose" feature of Excel must be the single most stupid UX implementation ever! Copy, Paste-special, Transpose checkbox, Paste. WTF?

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Keyboard Shortcuts 

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Find a boyfriend who can organize the Olympic Games in Excel, and he won’t have any problem planning a Vegas trip or wedding later. Good choice!

• I just used the array function on Excel spreadsheet. Feeling extremely genius bout myself now. Lol 🙂
• if my excel work is correct, the answer is: 600
• Ur my hero! In ur honour I’m going to spend my Sunday night with a pivot table and my Q1 figures! #TheGeeksWillInheritTheEarth
• I just got really giddy learning about Excel 2007 conditional formatting data bars. Visual learners like me love this stuff #nerdalert
• If you’ve ever used a pivot table in a spreadsheet…you’ve written a BI query. @oraclebisig Nice explanation about #BI http://ow.ly/3KNgQ
• Applying Excel formulae to work out running times for my Noel Coward show #donetoomuchtempinginmytime
• Using Excel was supposed to make the guest list simple, but my mother can’t open the file. I do not know how to fix this problem efficiently
• What happens in Vegas…stays smartly in the form of a Excel spreadsheet until reported to my wife-to-be…at post-trip briefing.
• it just took me 10 min to figure out how to beat my auto-correct typing in excel for 2 stupid cells. #truestory
• Got powerpoint and excel this evening. Like Christmas, but after the presents you have to work. Doh!
• OBSESSED with planning my backyard vegetable garden. Already have the beds organized and color coded in an excel spreadsheet #nerdalert
• My boyfriend is so cute! He organized the "possible" olympic games onto an excel spreadsheet. Oh yes. Got to love organization!
• To really drive someone mad, just pass them an Excel Spreadsheet.. (aggh)
• Is it lame I’m constructing a work breakdown schedule in Excel for my wedding?
• I love getting documents in Excel format. Means I can calculate the average sentence, the sum of the headings – that kind of thing. #useful.
• tryin to do excel but the rascal flatts special is on.. love them
• turquoise and white excel spreadsheet with red and black text #whomadethisthing?
• It was 2:30am and I didn’t know what was going on! I’m not too conversant with Excel – funny now but not at stupid o’clock!

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Related Links:

• Conditional Formatting Data Bars
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel Functions

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Let’s put on some Duke Ellington, crack open a monthly revenue report in Excel, and party like it’s 36525.

• Dear @Microsoft , Excel 2010 is buggy and is making more and more work for me. Productivity: Zero. #officehaiku
• I thought #Excel couldn’t be any worse than I’d already discovered it to be, but it always surprises me with new ways NOT to work #ExcelFail
• If excel is like a daily jog and pivot tables are like a marathon why do monthly revenue reports seem worse than an iron man?
• When you simultaneously work on pdf and Excel files, you realise that Excel should have a hand tool or a pan tool that Adobe Acrobat has
• Still up inputing data into spss and microsoft excel. I don’t wanna be a teacher anymore. This is entirely too much work. #tiredtweet
• #FML! Just worked super hard on trying to finish an excel project that I thought was due at 12 when it was due at 11:30 + it was worth 60pts
• I may have just created the single sexiest and most useful excel spreadsheet EVER!!! With it I shall RULE THE WORLD!!!!
• Can’t believe I just spent two hours on that spreadsheet. Like really?
• #saynoto merged cells and shared workbooks in #Excel
• I’ll just send gobbledegook. That will shut him up for a while. Back to your spreadsheet and Harvard Business Review, you pencilneck.
• I’ve seen his package, and its HUGE -coworker on my boss’ excel spreadsheet
• Tonight we’re gonna party like it’s 36525. #excel
• Have a pal in the army who keeps sending me ‘bravery’ videos. I work with a MNC. Should I send him excel sheets?
• Made the mistake of asking my helpful developer colleague for help with an #Excel macro. #BazookaToAKnifeFight
• excel is my friend… too bad it is like my wife, we only partially speak each others’ language. #excel
• If one spends too much time with someone u r in love with them. This has been replaced with Excel sheets now
• Coffee…check. Duke Ellington on spotify…check. Multiple excel spreadsheets open….check. I LOVE working from home #geekric

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Related Links:

• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel VBA
• Excel Tips and Tutorials

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Thundercats used to be popular at our house, but I never connected it with Excel. Twilight Zone, however, sounds like some shared spreadsheets that I’ve seen.

• Forgot to tag that with #excel , the Devil’s software. Or does #access hold that title?
• Dear clients: No, Excel can’t convert Photoshop graphics into live charts.
• I think i finally figured out how to use a pivot table in excel. scratch that off my bucket list.
• I’ve been using #microsoft #Excel 2007/2010 for at least 2 years. I still haven’t bought into whether it’s an improvement. frustrated.
• I am now having a migraine after solving an excel problem after 1 hour…
• Playing with Visual Basic. How on earth do you learn all these codes??? #microsoft #excel #visualbasic
• Every year I learn a little bit more about Excel’s pivot tables.Contrary to what you might expect, that’s a good thing.
• 7 hours in front of an Excel workbook, I feel strangely out-of-body, and emotional
• Group editing a spreadsheet. #notwinning
• the only reason why i went to comp sci today was because we are learning all about #excel #weirdobsession
• Sword of Omens, give me sight beyond sight. Oh, and some extra Excel-fu #thundercats #Excel
• Do you think there’s a job out there called ‘Pivot table creator’? I think I would enjoy that.
• Spent all morning fixing microsoft excel shared worksheet issues! Seriously stopping me and others from doing their work, fixed now!
• If I don’t fall sleep in the next 10min, I’m sure I’m gonna get back to my Excel Sheets and work for the next couple hours! #excel=ENDLESS
• Drawing circles with scatter charts is trickier than it looks. Don’t let your mind wander. Excel will catch you. #excel #in
• I found myself suggesting an excel spreadsheet and developing a process. Who am I??? #twilightzone
• sucks when two people are trying to edit the same document at the same time. damn #excel
• just filled in a excel spreadsheet.. i feel sad, nauseous, confused, gobsmacked.. it cant be surely not… ?
• Why spend the day shopping when you know you’d rather be enjoying the delights of an excel spreadsheet?
• I finally opened #Excel to start my spread sheet after much procrastination, now i’m on #twitter again 😛

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel VBA

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Today’s Excel lessons — never correct your wife, use your powers to help your dad, and don’t annoy macro-writing co-workers.

• Turns out the problem was having Excel open at the same time as Word. #ffs
• I go from my store yday, where it was so busy I couldn’t eat, to my new store. where I am changing colors on an excel spreadsheet.
• i don’t think an excel spreadsheet is large enough for 7 combinations and its infinite 🙁 #FML so so much
• For one day I would love a day without microsoft excel and powerpoint… I wonder if my boss is ok with me giving them up for lent
• Could this spreadsheet lesson get any more boring … "show and hide these rows" .. *yawn* :/
• My color-coding system is changing. Lavender is easier to read than violet. -4 man points. #excel
• It has been so long since I have had to make charts in Excel. Have lots of numbers to make into something sensible. Tips appreciated.
• If u want me 2 write an Excel macro 2 turn ur daily hour task into a 5 seconds one, and I’m doing it, don’t cc my boss in ur "done?" email.
• Magical Megan Excel Powers: Episode 3.9: The case of her father’s missing spreadsheet tab. "Click the arrow on the bottom." #shazam…
• I look forward to free meals at work but there’s always a price to pay right. <opens new excel window>
• Playing with excel, trying to work out where my money goes every month. Still none the wiser.
• live corporate dream – curry & spreadsheet – er, is it too late for another career change? #overtime http://yfrog.com/h459ohxj
• my roommate is making an excel spreadsheet of how shes gonna spend her money over spring break. im wearing shutter shades and eating oatmeal
• I judge my productivity on how often I crash #excel. Count this morning: 4, median daily crashes: 1.5, months supply of crashes: 7.2
• I seems I can’t spend ten minutes on a spreadsheet without making a cup of tea #procrastination
• I am on a computer. I am tweeting from the computer. I am pretending to work on excel whilst tweeting from the computer. Mission successful.
• And, in my case for this stupid Excel VBA, it’s "what the hell was I thinking" #dontjudgeme
• it’s taken me this long, but i’ve finally found something PCs do better than macs: MS excel. HATE the mac version.
• Did 3 min’s of Excel/charting work for my wife, who is excel-illiterate. Pretty 3D bar chart. She thinks I’m a genius. Who am I to correct?

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Related Links:

• Excel Charts
• Excel Pivot Tables
• Excel VBA

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